Beauty in the Breakdown
by Satan-wears-prada
Summary: Addison at sixteen and how her life falls apart for her. Deals with abuse and rape.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N:** Okay, so I'm posting another stry b/c my friends want me to. This fic deals with abuse and rape, but only really for the first few chaps. This is Addison at 16 and her parents divorce and neither want her, so she falls into the wrong crowd, and her life beomes hell. This is just a starter chap, all will start in the next one.

Disclaimer: Don't own them

Enjoy

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Addison sighed as she heard her parents arguing again. It felt like the hundredth time that day. She picked up her iPod and put her earphones in, turning on her music. Her eyes closed and she led back on her bed. All her parents seemed to be doing lately was arguing, it always seemed to be about stupid things as well. They never seemed to be happy anymore. They were hardly ever in the same room anymore. Addison placed her iPod on her night stand, letting the music overtake her as she drifted off to sleep.

A week later while Addison was sat in the kitchen eating lunch, was when she was told her parents were divorcing. It wasn't a huge surprise, and it wasn't as devastating as it should be. She just sat and looked at her parents. No one said anything for a while. Addison shrugged and went back to her lunch, at least she wouldn't have to listen to them arguing anymore.

Addison sat and tapped her fingers against the table as her parents argued once more. They were getting divorced, how could they still be arguing? She glanced around the room and let her head drop to her hands. Both her parents' lawyers didn't seem impressed either. A sigh passed her lips as she heard her name.

"Addison can live with you!" Peter yelled at his soon to be ex-wife.

"Why me?! Why can't she live with you?!" Joanna looked at Peter.

"You're the one keeping the house! She's got all her stuff there! And you're her mother!"

"You're her father!"

"She should stay with you!"

"She can't stay with me! My job will be taking me all everywhere! She should stay with you!"

"I'm not home much with my job!"

"Well she is your daughter too, you can't just throw the responsibility at me, you know I'm working in a very important project right now, it will earn me promotion."

"I don't care! I'm not going to be home to take care of her!"

"Of course not, you only have time for your lovers." She raised her voice.

"Hey I'm not the one who slept with my brother the night before our wedding!" Peter glared at Joanna.

"Well I was about to commit myself to a life with bad sex so I needed that." Addison groaned at the image in her head and let it hit the desk.

"Well I must have done something right to get you Addison!"

"No I was just not so smart at that time, now I know it was a big mistake!" She just wanted to hurt him

"Hello! In the room! I can hear all what you say! I don't need to hear how much neither of you want me!" Addison yelled trying not to let the tears fall.

"Now look what you've done Joanna!" Peter looked at his soon to be ex-wife.

"Me? I didn't leave my family to be with that slut!"

"I never left you to be with her!"

Before she knew it her hand landed across his face. "You think I was going to let you stay here while you are with her as well?"

"Better than being with a cold hearted bitch." He spat.

"Just leave!!" She yelled at him. "I'll see what I can do with Addison on my own."

"I would have left years ago if I wasn't for Addison."

"Yeah right." She turned her back to him. "You just said you didn't want her."

"I'm not the one who doesn't want her."

"I'm just saying I'm in a very busy time at work, now is not the best time for her to be with me, but it doesn't matter I just want you out of our lives so just go."

"Fine, I will then." Peter turned to look at the lawyers.

"Fine" She replied in a cold way.

"She is having custody of Addison then." Peter told his lawyer. Joanna was still not sure about it, she had no time to take care of Addison but she didn't want Peter to have her now either so she agreed to sign the papers that would give her full custody of Addison. Addison sighed and just watched her parents.

As soon as they were done Joanna stood up and motioned for Addison to follow her. "Let's go Addison."

"So I don't even get to say goodbye then?"

"I'll wait for you in the car Addison, don't take long." She said good bye to everyone except for Peter then she left the office. Addison stood and shifted on the spot, not sure who she would rather go with.

Peter put his arms around his daughter. "I will always be there for you."

"Thanks dad." She turned slowly and walked to the door.

"I will come see you this weekend okay." He hated to see his daughter leave but he knew he could not take care of her at the moment.

"Okay." She got this feeling he wouldn't, but didn't say anything just left. Peter opened and checked his schedule for the weekend, it was all full he just let out a sigh.

Addison sat in the car and gazed out the window as her mother drove in silence. She knew her mother didn't want her living with her, really neither of them did. They stopped at the traffic lights and a family caught Addison's eye. They were happy, and together, why couldn't she have that? What had she done that she didn't deserve a loving family. She watched them as they laughed together then walked across the road, it was everything she had ever wanted. It was the one thing she just couldn't have, and probably never would. She sighed and let her forehead rest against the cold glass. Her life would never be simple.

A month later and the divorce was finalized. Addison would live with her mother and see her father on weekends if he was available, and that, caused another argument between them. Addison just wished it would all stop, that she could get away, but she couldn't.

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continue or not??


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Okay so this was meant to be posted hours ago, but when I came onto fanfic earlier I started to read a story. So here is the next chapter now. I am surprised at the response I got for this fic, it has made me happy. This chapter starts the first bit of how her life goes down hill, the chapters will tend to get a bit worse after this one, they will deal with self harm, abuse and rape.

Disclaimer: Don't own them

Please give me your thoughts.

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Addison walked through the park and kicked a stone. She didn't want to go home, but she had nowhere else to go. Her mother probably wasn't home, and if she was, she wouldn't want Addison there. Addison kicked the same stone again and walked along the path. She stopped when she spotted five kids from her school. She looked and saw they were smoking, and having a laugh. Slowly she began walking towards them, normally she'd stay out of their way.

"Hey! Addison right?" One of the boys called out to her.

"Yeah…"

"Come over." He beckoned her over. "What you doing all alone?"

"I don't want to go home." She stood in front of them.

"Oh." Steve, the guy, smiled. "Here, why don't you try one, it'll make you feel better." He handed her a cigarette. "Go on, try it." He smiled.

Addison looked at it, before looking at the others, they were all smoking. "Okay…" She took it.

"Put it up to your lips." Addison did as he said and he lit the end for her. "Then inhale slowly." Addison inhaled and started coughing. Steve laughed. "Don't worry, happens the first time, it'll be fine your second." She nodded slowly.

"You're not as nerdy as we thought." Diane one of the girls pushed herself off the tree she was leaning against and took a puff of her cigarette, blowing the smoke in Addison's direction. "You could fit in with us." She tilted her head to the side and looked at Addison. "What do you think Blair?" She called the other girl.

"She could, if she changes her style a bit, and her attitude. We can work on her though." Blair took a puff on her cigarette. "Take another puff." She motioned to Addison's. She slowly brought it up to her lips and copied the two girls, this time she didn't cough. "Good." Blair smiled. "Fitting in already."

"Babe, I want to go home." Ryan wrapped his arms around Blair and under her top.

"We will." Addison tried not to look as his hands moved up towards Blair's breasts.

"Take him home B, give him what he wants." Diane smirked.

"Okay, okay." Blair rolled her eyes and her and Ryan left.

"So, you got a boyfriend Addison?" Diane raised an eyebrow.

"Erm, no."

"Shame, you're missing out on something great. Sex is just amazing." She winked at Jake. "Here, you should try these." She handed Addison a packed of cigarettes. "Be good by the time we see you in school tomorrow." She walked over to Jake before they left as well.

Steve smiled at Addison and moved closer. "So, you want to hang around with us then? You got no one else, you might as well." She nodded at him. "Good, I'll see you in school tomorrow then." He winked before walking off as well. "Smoke those fags!" He shouted over his shoulder and Addison brought it up to her lips and inhaled again. It wasn't actually that bad.

Addison walked into her house that night and noticed her mother still wasn't home. She walked into the kitchen and pulled out a ready meal and put it in the microwave. She noticed that she smelt of smoke and she screwed her nose up. Next time she would have to take body spray with her when she smoked. She took her dinner out of the microwave and sat at the kitchen table to eat it.

Addison stood in her room and looked at the packet of cigarettes. She shut her door and walked to her window, opening it fully. Her bedroom was at the back so her window wouldn't be seen, and she had a small roof beneath her window which she climbed out onto. Addison made herself comfortable and took out the lighter she had got from the kitchen, putting a cigarette to her lips she lit it. She inhaled slowly, before blowing it out. It was pretty easy now. She looked around her garden at the trees and flowers, it looked so peaceful.

Just as she finished smoking she heard her mother's car pull up in the drive. Addison climbed back into her room, shut her window and sprayed, making sure there was no smell of smoke. She walked into her bathroom and turned on her shower, before stripping and getting in under the water. She washed the smell of smoke off her, she didn't want her mother finding out, not that she would probably care.

Addison walked into school the next day and saw the group of five. Steve spotted her and called her over. She smiled as she got nearer. "Hey."

"So, how was the smoking?" Diane raised her eyebrows.

"Okay."

"Good, got any left."

"Yeah…"

"Good, you don't want to smoke too many in a day, costs too much."

"So sit with us in class." Blair played with her lip piercing.

"You should take her out shopping Di." Jake commented, looking Addison up and down.

"Sure, we could go tonight, you free?" She looked at Addison who nodded. "Good. We can go after school."

"Okay." The bell rang signalling the start of class, and they made their way to maths.

"No you want this." Blair held up a very short mini-skirt. Addison looked at it stunned.

"No, that may be you but it's not her." Diane put it back and picked up another skirt, this one a bit longer. "Try this one, with this top."

"And this one." They piled clothes into Addison's arms. "Go try it on." They pushed her towards the changing rooms, where she tried every one on. She ended up buying only two things. "Now underwear."

"What?" Addison looked at Blair in shock.

"Well you need sexy underwear for your boyfriend."

"I don't have a boyfriend…"

"But you will soon." Blair smirked. "Now underwear, follow me." Addison followed them to another shop. "Ta-da!" Blair stood in front of Ann Summers.

"You want me to go in there?!"

"Yes, I go in all the time. Guys love stuff from this shop, now come on." Blair pulled Addison into the shop, knowing exactly where she was going. "Hmm." She searched the shelves for what she wanted. "What bra size are you?" She looked at Addison's boobs.

"I'm not telling you that!"

Blair rolled her eyes. "Hmm, well, you're big, so I'd say like 36C, would you think Di?"

"Yeah, she looks it."

Addison sighed. "Fine I'm a 36C."

They smirked. "We knew it." Addison huffed slightly and crossed her arms over in front of her boobs. "And there's a matching thong." Blair pushed the underwear into Addison's arms. "This set is good too." She began picking out different sets and giving them to Addison.

"Whoa, not too much there B." Diane put a couple set backs. "Let her try these ones out first, then she can always come back and get the rest." Blair nodded and they walked to the till, where Addison paid.

"Now all we need is to get you a boyfriend."

"And I know someone who is interested." Diane smirked as they left the shop.

"Who?"

"Ah, now that would be telling, but I don't think it will be that long before he asks you out, and you should say yes."

"Oh, okay…" Addison wasn't quite sure if she wanted a boyfriend just yet.

"Good." Blair smiled. "You can show off your new underwear to him. I know Ryan loves mine." She smirked.

"Okay we don't need to know about your sex life with Ryan." Diane rolled her eyes.

"Whatever." Blair shrugged. "So, Addison, you still a virgin?"

"Yes."

"Well, you'll soon pop your cherry when he asks you out." Diane winked.

"Who?"

"I'm not going to say anything, you'll find out soon enough." They walked down the street.

"Hey!" Steve ran up behind them and put an arm around Addison's and Diane's shoulder. "So how did shopping go?" He looked down at Addison's bags.

"Okay, she'll fit in with us in no time." Blair smiled. Steve nodded his head and let his gaze travel upwards, so he could look down Addison's top. "I better go, see you guys later." She waved goodbye before turning off.

"Any plans for tonight?" Steve raised his eyebrows and glanced up at Addison's face.

"No." She shook her head.

"You could come out with us."

"Where?"

"Oh." He shrugged and looked down her top again. "Just the park. Meet us at seven."

"My mom will be home then."

"Sneak out, I do." Diane shrugged.

"I can't." Addison shook her head.

"Come on, it'll be fun." Steve urged.

"Sorry, another time?"

"Okay then. You should go home, we'll see you tomorrow." Steve and Diane walked off, leaving Addison alone. She looked away before walking home.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N:** I didn't think that you guys would like this story as much as you do, but you might not like it as much after this one, it deals with rape and not lightly at all, sorry.

Disclaimer: Don't own them, only the plot.

Enjoy

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Five days later saw Addison walked through the park again. She had arranged to meet there with Steve. He had wanted to talk to her, but she had no idea about what. He was stood by the same lot of trees smoking. She hadn't smoked that much since she got with them, but she had smoked, only mainly with them when they said to her about smoking, she didn't smoke on her own.

"Hey." She walked up to him.

"Hey." He put his cigarette out and walked towards her.

"You wanted to talk to me."

"Yeah, I did." He smiled and stood close to her. "I was thinking, seeing as we're both single, and both attractive, that we should get together, what do you think?" He titled his head slightly and looked down at her. "Well?"

Addison looked up at him not sure what to say. "O…okay…"

"Good." He smiled. "Now, how about a kiss for your new boyfriend huh?" He lent down and captured her lips in a sloppy way. It didn't spark anything in Addison, she felt nothing. "Let's go back to mine, it's a bit more private." He took hold of her hand and led her back to his house.

Steve's house wasn't as big as Addison, it was much, much smaller. Steve led her up the stairs to his room, and shut the door behind him. He sat down on the bed and pulled her down next to him. "So?" He smiled. "Let's take it one step at a time." She nodded her head. "Okay." He lent forward and kissed her again, pulling her close this time. He pushed his tongue against her lips until she parted them. One of his hands slid under her top, making her tense. Steve didn't seem to notice this and let his hand travel up and under her bra, grasping her breast.

"I don't think I can do this." She pulled back.

"Hey, it's what boyfriends and girlfriends do, I'm not asking for much, we'll take it one step at a time." He pulled her closer to him again, returning his lips to hers. Steve began to feel her up, making her feel uncomfortable.

He pulled her onto his lap and she felt the bulge in his jeans. "Give me your hand."

"Why?"

"Just give me your hand." He reached for it and Addison let him take hold of it. He unzipped his trousers and left them open before taking her hand again. "Take hold of me."

"What?"

"Just do it." He moved her hand to his erection and wrapped her fingers around him. "Now move your hand." He moved her hand up and down and let out a moan. "Keep going." He placed his lips back on hers. Addison did as he asked and heard the moans escape his mouth. She didn't feel comfortable at all.

After a few minutes he moaned loudly and his semen left him. Addison pulled her hand back and looked at him. "That was fucking good." He sighed. "Now it's your turn."

"What?!" She began to panic.

"For me to pleasure you, lie back on the bed."

"What are you going to do?"

"Finger you, what else." He shifted her onto the bed.

"You can't!"

"Why not?" He looked at her.

"I haven't finished my period."

"Oh." He pulled back. "Okay, another time then." He shrugged and stood up, doing up his jeans and taking out a cigarette. "You can go home now if you want." Addison nodded and stood up. "See ya in school." She quickly left, not wanting to be there anymore.

Addison lay on her bed that night and starred at the ceiling. What had she gotten herself into, she wasn't supposed to be doing this sort of stuff. She sighed as her bedroom door opened and her mother walked in. "I have to go away Addison for a while, you'll be fine here if I leave you enough money to get food won't you?" She raised her eyebrows.

Addison didn't dare argue. "Yeah, I'll be fine, how long will you be gone?"

"Until next Friday, I leave early in the morning." Addison nodded again and her mother left, shutting the door. She sighed again and closed her eyes, turning over, trying to sleep.

That weekend Addison walked to the park with Steve, they held hands and his was slightly clammy. She just wanted to drop it, but couldn't, he already thought she was a prude and made fun of her. They walked to the same lot of trees where the other four already were. "What took you so long?!" Jake huffed and threw a bottle of cheap alcohol towards Steve.

"Thanks mate."

"Here." Blair pushed a bottle into Addison's hand before taking a swig of her own. Steve unscrewed the lid and took a long swig before joining the other two guys there. "Drink it then." Addison unscrewed the lid and took a sip, screwing her face up. "It's only cheap stuff, but whatever."

"Just throw it back." Diane threw her head back and drank the rest of her bottle. Addison just watched her. "Go on." She looked at the bottle hesitantly before taking a large gulp. She grimaced at the taste. The guys joined them and wrapped an arm around their girlfriends.

"So like the drink?" Steve looked at Addison.

"Erm, it's okay I suppose."

Steve smirked. "Drink some more then, it makes you feel great."

"Okay…" She took another sip and Steve encouraged her to drink more, in fact he wouldn't stop until she had consumed the whole bottle. Addison felt all light headed and like she was swaying. Her movements felt slightly sluggish to her as well.

Blair and Ryan began making out and nearly ripped each others clothes off before they decided to go home, and do it in private. Diane and Jake were all over each other before they left as well, leaving a tipsy Addison and a still kind of sober Steve. "Shall we go back to mine?"

Addison blinked at him a few times. "My mom isn't home…"

"You'll have some company at mine." He smirked and she gingerly nodded her head. "Good." He took her hand and led her back to his, Addison tripping over her feet at times. He held her up and took her to his house.

Steve sat Addison down on his bed and made sure his door was shut and locked. He knew she was kind of out of it and wouldn't know what was happening. He smiled and sat next to her, kissing her hungrily. She seemed surprised at first and he pushed her back against the bed. He pressed his body against hers. His hands took hold of the bottom of her top before pulling it off. Addison looked up at him confused.

"It's okay." He removed his own top before kissing her again and moving to her trousers. Quickly Steve pushed her trousers off and took his own off. He reached behind her back and unclasped her bra, he could see she was not in a state to know what was going on and he smiled to himself. His hands moved down her body and into her panties, before pulling them off as well. He parted her legs before discarding his boxers and settling above her.

He slid into her and began to thrust, ignoring the grimace on her face, apparently she could still feel pain. Steve pulled her legs up around his waist and kept moving inside of her. His head dropped to her shoulder and he began to suck the flesh, biting as well. Once he had marked the skin he removed his mouth, his hands roaming over her breasts. Her eyes were half open and unfocused as she looked up at him. Steve brushed her cheek with his thumb and kissed her lips. He felt his release near, and he filled her with his semen, a moan leaving his lips.

Steve removed her legs from around his waist and pulled out of Addison. He saw the blood and rolled his eyes, he should have known it would have been her first time. He climbed out of bed and walked to the bathroom to clean himself up. By the time he got back to his room Addison had fallen asleep. He pulled on a pair of boxers and left the room, leaving her naked and exposed on his bed.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Okay so here is the next chap for you all. Glad you are liking it:D This chap deals with him forcing her to do sexual things and self harm.

Disclaimer: Don't own them.

Enjoy

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Addison awoke the next day to a headache. She reached a hand up and cradled her head. Slowly she sat up and noticed she wasn't in her own room, then she noticed she was naked. She gasped and realised she was in Steve's bed. Something red caught her eye on the sheets. Blood. There was blood on the sheets, and on her. Tears sprang to her eyes. Had her and Steve, done it? Had they actually had sex? She got off the bed and quickly pulled on her clothes, wishing she hadn't moved as fast.

Slowly the bedroom door opened and Steve walked in smiling at her. "Good morning sleeping beauty, sleep well?" He smiled widely.

"Yeah, thanks…" She ran a hand through her hair.

"Good."

"I should go, I want to go and change."

"Okay. Meet us later in the park?"

"Erm, maybe, I don't feel all that great."

"Okay." He smiled. "See ya."

"Bye." She quickly left his house. Steve stood smirking to himself, he always got what he wanted.

Addison got in under the hot water as soon as she got home. She wanted to get rid of any traces of him. Getting in with them was such a bad idea. But she had gone too far now, there was no turning back. She had already slept with the guy. Addison scrubbed hard at her body, the hot water burning her skin. The tears ran down her cheeks, stinging. This was not how her life was meant to be.

Once she felt she had gotten as much of him off her as she could, she got out of the shower. Carefully she wrapped a towel around her body that stung from the hot water and scrubbing. She walked to her room and sat down on her bed, looking around her. She sighed and stood up again, pulling out clean clothes and placing them on her bed. Carefully she took the towel off and applied cream to her body, trying to stop the slight stinging. Once she had the cream on she began to get dress.

Ten minutes later and Addison stood in the kitchen staring at the knives. It would be so easy, to just pick one up, and cut. No one would see, so no one would know. She could end it all and there would be no one there to stop her. No one would know. Slowly Addison reached for a knife and held it in her hand, looking at the sharp blade. She brought it to her arm and pressed slightly, just feeling it on her arm. It felt…good. Slowly she pressed harder so blood appeared. She gasped slightly and moved the knife, leaving a clean cut. Blood trickled down the arm and she just stared at the cut, feeling, refreshed. Suddenly she felt better and she moved the knife to another place on her arm, cutting again and watching the blood. She had found what she needed.

Addison placed the knife on the side and turned on the tap, letting the cold water run over the cuts she had made, washing away the blood. She watched as her blood went through the plughole, not being seen again. She grabbed a towel and wrapped it around her arm, before going to the cupboard and getting out a bandage and wrapping it tightly around her so the bleeding would stop. Addison then went back upstairs to get a jumper to cover her arms.

The doorbell rang just as she had pulled a jumper on, and she walked back down the stairs, not really wanting to see anyone. She sighed and pulled open the door, revealing Steve, Diane, Ryan, Blair and Jake stood there. "Hey!" They walked into her hallway.

"Nice house." Blair commented and looked around. "Anyway, we heard your mom isn't home?"

"No, she's gone away until next Friday."

"Cool." There was a sparkle in Blair's eyes.

"House party!" Diane sang.

"What?" Addison looked at them.

"A house party." Steve dropped an arm around her shoulders. "A party in your house." He smiled down at her.

"I don't think that would be a good idea."

"Your mom would never know!"

"I still don't think…"

"We get away with them all the time." Blair shrugged. "My mom never finds out."

"We could arrange it for tonight, we will take care of everything."

"But…"

"Don't worry about it babe." Steve kissed her neck.

"Leave it to us!" Diane and Blair smiled and left the house ready to plan the party for that night.

"I really don't think it's a good idea."

"It'll be fun, we'll go get some booze." Ryan and Jake left as well.

Steve smiled down at Addison and pulled her close. "Tonight will be fun."

"Yeah… they won't invite too many people will they?"

"No, of course not."

"Okay…" She still wasn't sure.

"I should let you go and get ready for tonight, you can wear some of your new clothes." He smiled and left. Addison sighed and closed her eyes briefly. This was not meant to be happening.

Addison looked around at the people she didn't know in her house. She hadn't seen most before and she wondered if they knew anyone else there. Her eyes widened as she saw two drunk guys throwing a vase to each other. "Hey!" She caught it. "Don't break that, it's was my grandmothers." She frowned and put it back.

"Hey lighten up babe." Steve wrapped his arms around her. "Just let the party go. Let's go upstairs and forget about this lot." A shiver ran down her spine as he dragged her upstairs and into her room. Steve shut the door behind them and led them to the bed. "So?" He smiled at her. "Let's have a little party of our own shall we?" Addison just looked at him. "Kneel down in front of me."

"What? Why?"

"Just kneel down." He pulled her arm so she ended up kneeling in front of him. Steve unbuckled his belt and unzipped his trousers. Addison swallowed and just looked at him. He revealed himself and smiled. "Go on, do what you want to do." He smirked at her and she didn't move making him roll his eyes. "It's not hard." He shifted a bit closed to her and placed a hand either side of her face, bringing it closer to him. "Just suck."

Addison had no idea what to do. He brought her face even closer to him. "Put your mouth around me and suck." His tone was harsh. Slowly she opened her mouth and placed her lips around him. "Good." She began to do as he asked and his moved his hips towards her slightly then with drew them and repeated it. His eyes closed and he moaned, his hands still on her face. "Harder baby."

Tears stung Addison's eyes. "I don't want to do this anymore." She tried to pull back.

"No, you will do it, now." He shoved her head back and forced her. She tried not to let the tears fall as he moaned. "This is good, keep going." She could feel him hardening in her mouth and knew he was getting close. Addison pulled away. "Finish off." She didn't move forward. "With your hand then." He grabbed her hand and wrapped her fingers around him. "Go on." She began moving her hand up and down, giving him his release, making him moan. "Fuck me." He breathed. "That wasn't so hard now was it?" He stood up, doing his jeans up again. "Next time, don't whine and just get on with it." Addison looked down at the floor and fought against the tears. He walked out of her bedroom and back down to the party.

Slowly Addison got up and walked into her bathroom, locking herself in. She walked to the sink and looked at herself in the mirror, she felt disgusted. With a shaky hand she opened the cabinet and got out the razor, pulling it apart to get the blade out. With tears running down her cheeks, she turned to the other arm this time and drew the sharp object across her flesh, watching as the blood once again trickled down her arm. She felt the pain and felt good about herself. Addison removed the blade and moved to another spot on her arm, cutting there as well. She knew she shouldn't, but she needed to. It was what was keeping her breathing.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: I've spent most of my day rehersing for our show and I've kinda screwed my ankle and I've spent the day dancing on it, which probably wasn't a good idea but nevermind. This chapter deals with rape and abuse.

Enjoy

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Addison looked at the state of her lounge the next morning and sighed. It was a mess. She wasn't going to have another house party in a while. She began to clean it all up, keeping her arms covered. The bleeding had stopped but it had left pink moist cuts. She sighed as she threw the trash into a black bag.

Once she has finished cleaning up, the doorbell rang. By now it was lunch time and Addison was hungry. She walked to the door and pulled it open, revealing Steve who walked straight in. "Least it's cleaner than last night." He looked around. "Shut the door we don't want people seeing our business." Addison shut the door and turned to face him. "I want you upstairs."

"Why?"

"Just go upstairs." He took hold of her arm and pushed her towards the stairs, walking up after her. "Sit on the bed." He pushed her down and began kissing her roughly. She wriggled beneath him and he pinned her down. "Now you enjoyed it last time, so be a good girl again." She looked up at him and froze. She couldn't have enjoyed it before, could she? Steve kissed her again and let his hands roam her body. She felt so uncomfortable but could do nothing to stop him. He began to take off her clothes, leaving her in her underwear, he took no notice of her arms, she meant nothing to him. He unclasped her bra before moving his hands down to her panties, sliding them off her hips. Quickly he undressed and parted her legs. Addison stared up at the ceiling feeling his hands on her, and closed her eyes as she felt him enter her painfully. She could feel his weight on her, moving against her skin. His mouth moved to her shoulder where he began to suck her flesh before biting, making her whimper in pain.

"Shush." He growled and moved his mouth back to her shoulder and began to bite again. Addison squeezed her eyes shut as he began to thrust harder into her, moans leaving his lips. She tried to block it all out, trying to feel numb and not feel anything.

It didn't seem long before he moaned deeply, filling her, before he rolled off onto her bed, breathing heavily. Once he had caught his breath, he turned on his side, moving his hand to one of her breasts, playing with her nipple. She closed her eyes again and squirmed. "No moving." He pinned her down again and let his hand travel downwards.

"I don't want to do this Steve." Addison whispered.

"You what?" He looked at her. "Did you say you don't want to do this anymore?" She nodded. "Well guess what, you have no choice about this." He spat pulling his hand away, sitting up. "You don't do anything anyway, no one says no to me." He slapped her hard across the face, catching her eye. She winced and instantly brought her hand up to her face, cradling it. Steve got off her bed and began to get dressed. "You don't get off that easily." He left her room, slamming the door behind him.

Addison felt the tears roll down her cheeks, making her eyes sting. Slowly she got off her bed and walked to the bathroom, where she once again, took a very hot shower. Once she had gotten out the shower, she picked up the blade again, making a long cut down her arm, letting the blood trickle down her arm, and drip slowly to the floor. Tears angrily rolled down her cheeks, her eye already becoming swollen and bruised. The cut was deeper this time, and longer. Addison sniffed and took the blade away from her arm, just looking at the blood. She suddenly felt sick. She knelt down in front of the toilet quickly before she started to throw up. Sighing she sat back and felt disgusted, she should stop him, but how? She didn't stand a chance.

Twenty minutes later, Addison walked down the stairs on shaky legs before sitting on the couch, after turning on the TV. She flicked through the channels before she settled on a movie. Snuggling down to watch, she held her arms in front of her as not to touch the cuts she had made. She had wrapped bandages around them, trying to stop the bleeding. Addison just led and watched the movie, forgetting about her own problems for a while.

About half way through the movie, her eyes closed and she drifted off to sleep, dreaming peacefully.

Addison walked into school and hoped the foundation and her hair would cover the bruise enough to stop people from asking questions. She wanted to avoid everyone she could, especially him. She walked to her locker and opened it, taking out her books that she needed for first period. She turned to the direction she was going to head and Steve stood in her way smiling, looking at her eye. "Sleep well?" He asked and she nodded slightly. "Good." He smirked and took hold of her arm, walking to class.

As Addison walked into her classroom after lunch and noticed she was the first one there. The teacher looked up and smiled, before catching sight of her eye and frowning. "What happened Addison?"

"Erm…" Steve walked into the classroom at this point, making his presence known to Addison. "Nothing, I just opened the cupboard too far." Addison shrugged and sat down, Steve following her.

He wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her close, his face inching to her ear. "Tell anyone and you will have more than a bruised eye from me, your life will be hell." He kissed her cheek and lent back in his chair, smiling as more people walked into the classroom. Addison just looked down and felt so alone.

After that lesson Addison went back to her locker and took out any books she needed to take home. She looked around before she walked out of school, needing to take a walk, to clear her head, to think.

She headed out of school and walked slowly home, just thinking about everything that had happened to her. Her life was hell already, she didn't want to make it worse by telling, she'd just keep her mouth shut. Then once she was old enough to leave, she would, and never come back. She sighed and kicked a stone, watching it bounce along the road. She felt so used, she'd just go home and cut again, it seemed to get to calm her, clear her mind.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Thank you so much for all the reviews I am getting, just don't forget that wehn you hit rock bottom the only way you can go is up, and that's how it'll work for Addison. Once again deals with abuse and rape.

Enjoy

* * *

A month later and Addison lay underneath Steve again, she had lost count of how many times he had made her do things to him she didn't want to do. She had just learnt to blank it all out, feel numb at that time. Learnt to ignore his hands all over her body, his moans in her ear, his mouth on her skin.

He moved above her and bit too hard on her skin, making her bleed. She winced and he removed his mouth from that spot, closing his eyes as he moaned deeply, letting his semen fill her, whether she wanted it or not. He breathed heavily and looked down at her. "You're bleeding," he commented pulling out of her.

"I know." Her voice was small.

"I need a fag." He pulled his boxers on and pulled a cigarette out of his pocket.

"Can you not smoke in here please."

"So where am I meant to smoke?" He raised his eyebrows.

"There's a roof under my windows." Steve looked and climbed out onto it, lying back and smoking. Addison sighed and gathered her clothes and began to get dressed. It was a Saturday so he would make her do something else before the day was over. She hated hanging with the group now, but had no choice about it. Steve would show her off, his hands all over her body, under her clothes, on her skin. He'd even make her do it in school if it was what he wanted.

Steve climbed back in through the window and looked at her. She looked back for a while. He smirked slowly and stepped towards her. "You know." He breathed into her ear. "It's better to keep your clothes off." He pulled her close and ran a hand under her top.

"Please." She pulled away.

"What?!" He yelled at her. "How many times do I have to tell you? No one says no to me." He clenched his hand into a fist and brought it up to her face, making her fall back against her bed. "I get what I want." he hissed and moved a few steps backwards. She felt the tears sting the back of her eyes and the blood run down her cheek. "Now I think you better make it up to me hadn't you?" He walked back towards her. "And it better be good. Take your clothes off, now." He pulled her up by her hair and watched as she took her clothes off again. "Good." He stripped from his boxers as well and sat down on the bed, with his legs apart. "You know what I want." Slowly she knelt down in front of him, a tear rolling down her cheek. "Don't be so pathetic crying, you want this as well." Steve grabbed her face and she opened her mouth, doing what he wanted.

Steve moaned again and opened his eyes, catching his breath. "Not too bad." He stood up and got dressed. "Be in the park at eight, don't be late." He glared at her before leaving. Addison waited until he'd left to let the tears fall again. She couldn't get away from it.

--

Addison looked at the clock and pulled on a jumper, hiding the cuts she had made earlier. Every time they seemed to get worse. She should stop, but it was the only thing that kept her breathing. She walked down the stairs and left the house heading towards the park.

Steve was stood by the same lot of trees and smiled at her as she approached. "Right on time." He took a swig of the bottle of alcohol he had. "Want some?" Addison shook her head. "Didn't think so." He took another swig and lent against the tree. "Come here." He held out his arm and she hesitantly walked to him. He pulled her close to his side. "We make a good couple." She could smell the alcohol on his breath. "We're good together." His hand moved down as he drank some more. "Best couple there is." He was drunk, she could tell. His fingers slid under the waist band of her jeans and she began to tense. "Everyone should be jealous." He drank some more and slipped his hand inside of her panties. "They don't know what they are missing." Addison squeezed her eyes shut and tried to block out his fingers slipping inside her and moving about. "But you're mine, no one else's, I don't share." He downed the rest and turned to her, kissing her neck.

"Steve."

"What?" He pushed her against the tree and removed his hand.

"We shouldn't."

"Why not?" He pressed his hips against her and she could feel the bulge that was starting to grow there.

"It's the park."

"So, they can see what they're missing out on."

"No, I don't want to…" She regretted the words as soon as they left her mouth.

"You what?" He growled pushing her harder against the tree. "I've told you before." He pushed his body into her and pushed his fist into her face again. He moved his hands and gripped her arms tightly, and she could feel her cuts opening up again.

"No, please." She tried to push him off her, but Steve simply growled again and pushed her against the tree, ripping her clothes off. "Please." She tried to push him away, tears running down her cheeks.

"Don't say a word, you deserve this." His breath smelt of alcohol and he unbuckled his jeans, pushing himself into her opening. She cried out in pain and his movements were rough and painful. Addison to push him off, but he had her pinned against the tree and was too strong. He began to bite her neck again, leaving a red mark. Tears ran down her cheeks, all she could do was wait for it to be over.

After a while, Steve pulled out of her and buckled his jeans again before looking at her. "Think about what you say next time, bitch." He turned and walked away, leaving her alone. The tears still rolled down her cheeks as she tried to make herself look presentable. Her jeans had mud on them, her top was ripped and blood-stained, and her cuts stung under the fabric.

Addison pushed herself off the tree and looked around, seeing no one there before she wrapped her arms around herself and made her way home, alone and scared.

She ran straight up to her room and turned on her shower, getting in and letting the hot water cascade over her body as her tears continued to fall. She scrubbed at her skin, trying to get rid of all traces of him. She scrubbed so hard her skin was sore and her cuts bled even more. Addison sniffed and slid down the wall, crying.

She cried until she had no energy left and she pulled herself from the bathroom, and onto her bed, where she collapsed and curled up into a ball, falling asleep.


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: Thank you so so much for the reviews I am recieveing, they mean so much to me :D

This chapter only deals with self harming, Steve is not in this chapter which I'm sure you're all relieved about.

Enjoy

* * *

Addison awoke to the beeping of her alarm the next morning. She reached out and shut it off, snuggling back down into her covers. Slowly the night before came flooding into her mind and tears stung the back of her eyes, making her feel ill. She felt so violated and exposed. She didn't want to go to school and see him, it just made her feel sick.

She heard footsteps down the hallway before her door opened and her mother walked in. "Addison? You'll be late if you don't get up." She walked into the room, standing at the end of the bed and staring down at her daughter "I don't have time to worry about you going to school or not."

"I'm not going."

"Why not?"

"I don't feel well." Addison lied, well, she did feel sick.

"Fine then." She walked back out the room and shut the door again. Addison sighed and curled tighter into a ball.

Addison waited until she heard the front door close behind her mother before she got out of bed, walking to her chest of drawers. She pulled open the top drawer and picked up the new blade she had acquired, before she sat back on her bed. The cold blade was placed against her skin and she slowly applied pressure, watching as it pierced her skin and the blood ran free down her arm. The blade went deeper this time, more blood running down her arm and dripping to her floor. She removed he blade and placed it on her other arm, repeating what she had just done.

Afterwards she sat and stared at the blood, feeling her head go light and woozy. This wasn't good. She heard their cleaner enter downstairs and she stood up, feeling the room spinning. She pulled her bedroom door open, leaving blood on the handle as it ran down her arms. Addison called out to the cleaner, who almost immediately appeared at the bottom of the stairs, gasping as she saw the blood, rushing towards Addison as she collapsed.

--

She could her voices before she opened her eyes. They weren't voices she recognized, and she heard someone leave the room. Slowly, Addison opened her eyes and looked around groggily. "Where am I?"

"You're in the hospital." The nurse looked at her.

"Oh." She blinked a few times and she looked down at her arms, seeing the bandages. "You stopped the bleeding?" Part of her was disappointed, but she knew she shouldn't show it.

"Yes." The nurse's voice was harsh. "I don't know why though."

"What?" Addison looked at her.

"You did this to yourself. We have people come in here who have been attacked and are bleeding to death, and they don't survive even though they want to, then there's people like you, who want to die, but survive."

Addison felt the tears feel her eyes again. "I should have died." Her voice was quiet.

The nurse opened her mouth ready to reply when the door opened and Joanna walked in. "Addison." She looked at her daughter in the bed. "What have you done to yourself?" Addison didn't reply and looked down. "I was in the middle of a very important meeting when I get a phone call telling me to come to the hospital straight away as my daughter has tried to kill herself. I have better things to be doing then wasting my time with you." The tears made their way down Addison's cheeks. "You obviously don't want to live."

"It would be better if I died."

"But you're alive." Addison nodded. "I should go back to the meeting now that I know you are still alive. How long will she be in here for?" Addison and Joanna turned to the nurse.

''Until we're done.''

"How long will that be?"

''About an hour.''

"Okay." Joanna nodded. "I'll either come back in an hour or get someone to pick you up." She looked at her daughter before she turned and left the room. The nurse started cleaning up, ignoring Addison as she looked down at her arms, wishing that she had died.

''Does it hurt?''

"What?" Addison looked up at the nurse confused.

''The cuts.''

"It hurts when I do it, then they'll be sore to touch after for a while." She shrugged.

''Why?'' The nurse sighed, pausing her cleaning to look up at Addison.

"Why do I do it you mean?"

''Yes.''

Addison shrugged again. "It makes me feel better, makes me feel alive. No one cares about me, so I cut."

''You nearly bled to death.''

"It's not like anyone would miss me."

''Your mother was just here wasn't she?''

"Yes, so?"

''If she didn't care she wouldn't be here.''

"She doesn't care, she's just here because she was told to come, she didn't even want me."

''If you say so.'' She went back to work.

"Then why was she fighting with my dad that she didn't want me to live with her. Neither of them wanted me to live with them."

''Divorces are hard.''

"So is life."

''You have to care about yourself because if you don't no one else will either.''

"There's nobody to care about me, so why should I bother?"

''Why wouldn't you care about yourself?'' Addison shrugged. ''Well?''

"What is there for me?"

''What do you mean?''

"No one else cares about me, so why should I?"

''Because if you don't then who will?''

"No one will ever care about me." Addison looked away as she felt the tears again, it was true, no one would ever care for her.

''And this will help?'' She raised her eyebrows. ''Man up.''

"There's nothing for me to live for."

''Nonsense.''

"It's not." She looked at her arms and her voice became quiet. "You don't know my life."

''You're sixteen.'' Addison shrugged. The nurse took off the bandages to check the bleeding, and Addison looked down at the numerous scars on her arms. ''Yeah, take a good look at it, that's what your arm is going to look like for the rest of your life.''

Addison looked up at her. "You wouldn't understand."

''Right, of course I won't because I'm a forty-two year old board certified nurse and you're a sixteen year old girl who is still in high school.''

"You have no idea what life is like for me, you have no idea what it is like to live my life."

''You people all say the same.''

"Really? Ever thought that maybe we all have hard lives?"

''God life is hard for every sixteen year old, you all think you're so special and so unique, you should be happy you even are alive.''

Addison turned to the nurse with tears in her eyes. "You even know what it's like to get up everyday and know your own parents don't care or even want you? To go to school everyday and have no friends. That the people who you hang around with just use you, especially your boyfriend who only wants one thing!"

''Then talk to your parents, make friends, dump your so called boyfriend!''

"It's not as easy as that!"

''Yes it is.''

"It's not." She shook her head.

''Yes it is, have you even tried?''

"Yes, I've always tried to make friends, it never works, I've tried talking to my parents but they just brush me off, I don't matter to them, like I don't matter to anyone."

''Then try other things.''

"Like what? I've tried saying no."

''No to what?''

"My boyfriend," she whispered. She knew shouldn't say anything, but she couldn't help it. "I said no, and look where it got me." She pointed to the bruise around her eye.

''Get rid of him.''

"I can't."

''Why not?''

"He'd get angry."

''So?''

"He'd do more than give me a black eye."

''Go to the cops.''

"Like they'd do anything." Addison looked down again. "When can I go home?"

''Soon.'' Addison nodded her head. She looked at her arms and felt sick. ''I'll come back once you're cleared.'' She nodded again and felt the bile rise in her throat. She watched the nurse leave, and slowly the tears began to fall as she held her arms out in front of her. It made her feel sick; they were completely scared, she would never be able to show them in public, no one would ever like her. She began to sob harder and curled into a ball.

--

About an hour later, Addison sat in the car with her mother. She let her head rest against the window and gazed out of it, ignoring her mother talking. She was probably telling Addison how stupid she was, something she'd heard a million times before, but she didn't care.

"Addison? Addison are you even listening to me?" Joanna glanced at her daughter. "Addison!"

"What?" She turned to look at her mother.

"I was talking to you."

"Oh, sorry, what were you saying?"

"Oh never mind." Joanna sighed. "You're staying with your father the weekend."

"What?"

"He rang and wants you to spend the weekend at his." Joanna shrugged. "You haven't seen him in a while you should go." Addison just nodded shocked. Her dad actually wanted to see her.


	8. Chapter 8

myA/N: Thank you once again for the reviews I get for this fic, they make my day! :D I don't think I've said this before, but I really should, and that is to thank ym friend Emily, **Crystaltears** (or something like that) for helping me with this fic, she has helped me so much when I've been stuck adn she's even wrote with me a fe times jsut toh elp so thank you soooo much Emily!! Love ya!! :D And thank you to my wonderful beta Beth!! You rock!!

Disclaimer: Do not own them

Enjoy

* * *

Addison looked around her dad's new house for the first time, he had never asked for her to visit before, so it made her think there was a reason. She noticed there were no photos up on the wall or the mantle piece, no photos at all.

Addison wandered through the house to the kitchen, the knives caught her eyes and she slowly walked towards them. Hesitantly she reached for them, but then the scars on her arms came to mind and she stopped, leaving the kitchen quickly.

She walked up the stairs to the room that would be hers and pushed the door open. It was just an ordinary room, with a bed, a closet, a desk, the main things a bedroom would contain. Addison walked in and looked around, it was like no one had entered the room since everything was put in there.

"You can decorate it however you want." Addison turned around to face her dad. "It's your room, you can do whatever you like to it. You can have whatever you want in it." He smiled at her and she slowly nodded. "What do you think?"

"It's…big." She turned back to the room and walked towards the window. "It has a lovely view though." She smiled.

"That it does, I thought you would like it." He walked further into the room. "You can buy clothes to keep here if you want. You can keep anything here you want to." Addison nodded and gazed out her window. "How are you Ads? I've missed having you in the house." She just shrugged at him.

There was something different about her, but he couldn't put his finger on it. Since the divorce, Peter had come to realise how important family was, and he really missed his daughter. He had missed her presence in the house. It was different now, though, Addison was different.

"How's school?" Again he just got a shrug. "Your mother told me what happened the other day." Addison tensed slightly. "You know, if you ever want to talk, I'm here, okay. Just because you don't live with me doesn't mean to say I don't care, because I do, you are the most important thing to me." This brought tears to Addison's eyes and she tried not to cry. Peter saw this and held his arms open. "Come here, sweetheart." Slowly she turned and fell into his hug. Peter kissed the top of his daughter's head and held her close. She wasn't the same person anymore, that much was certain, but he knew better than to push her now. "Shhh, it'll be okay." Addison sobbed onto his chest and shook her head. "It will be."

--

Addison sat down at the dinning table and picked up her fork. She hadn't eaten a proper meal in a while and was thankful for the food in front of her. Peter had always been the cook out of her parents. "Enjoying it?" Peter smiled at his daughter.

"Yes, I've been living off ready meals, they get a bit boring and tasteless after a while." She smiled.

"You should come round more often."

"Yeah…" It would get her away from Steve, she wouldn't have to do those things to him.

"I know I don't live that close to you, but you are welcome whenever, and you can always stay weekends." He smiled and she nodded. "It's a nice place here. I like it."

"It is a nice view here." She nodded and finished eating, pushing away her plate.

"One of the reasons I chose it. It has some good schools as well." Peter looked at his daughter and she just nodded again.

"I think I'll go take a bath then go to bed."

"It's early though." He raised an eyebrow.

"I know, but I'm tired." Addison stood up and picked up her plate.

"Leave that, I'll sort it out. If you want anything else, just ask."

"Okay." She nodded and left the room. Peter sighed and rubbed his face, wishing he hadn't left it so long to contact her.

Slowly Addison lowered herself into the bath, letting the water wash over her body. She laid back and allowed herself to relax. The whole place was relaxing and she felt so calm there. She closed her eyes and tried to forget about everything and just enjoy her bath.

Half an hour later Addison walked into her bedroom and looked around, it wasn't exactly welcoming but it would do. She picked up her bag and placed it on her bed. The scars looked pinker after her bath and she ran her fingers over them. Maybe it hadn't had been such a good idea at the time.

She sighed and pulled out her clothes, setting them on her bed. Addison began to fold them and put them away in her closet, filling only part of the big space. She walked back to her bed and picked up the bag, placing that in her closet as well. Slowly she began to dry herself and put on her pyjamas, placing the towel in her washing basket.

Addison looked around the room once more before she climbed into bed and snuggled down, closing her eyes. It didn't take long for her to drift off to a peaceful, much-needed sleep.

--

The sun shone through the window and onto the sleeping form of Addison. She slowly began to open her eyes and blinked, adjusting to the light. She stretched, feeling very refreshed. She turned on her side and looked at the clock, gasping when she read 11am. Never before had she slept so late.

She slipped out of bed and pulled a jacket on over the tank top she'd worn to bed, before she headed down the stairs.

Peter stood in the kitchen and smiled when Addison entered. "Good morning, did you sleep well." She nodded and rubbed her eyes.

"Want me to make you some breakfast? I remember how you loved pancakes, still like them."

"Yeah." She smiled.

"I'll make some then."

"Thanks." Addison sat down at the island in the kitchen. "Do I have to go back to mom's?"

"Do you not want to?"

"No, not really, I'd rather stay here."

Peter smiled. "Of course you can stay here. Stay for however long you want."

Addison nodded. "Can I not live with you?"

"Well, your mom has custody, but maybe we can rearrange it all."

"Okay." She sat in silence for a few minutes while he moved around the kitchen, preparing her breakfast, before placing a plate of pancakes in front of her. She smiled, beginning to eat.

"So I thought today, we could decorate your room, whatever colour you want." Peter smiled.

"How about lilac?"

"If it's what you want." Addison nodded. "Okay, we'll get the paint later, and we can have a look for anything else you want."

"Okay." She smiled.

--

Addison giggled as she had paint splattered over her face "Dad!"

"What?"

"You got paint on my face." She tried to wipe it off with no success.

"Now you've just smudged it." They both laughed. "I've missed you Ads."

"I've missed you too dad, it's not the same anymore." She sighed.

"I know, I'm sorry." He took a deep breath, knowing this was as good a time as any. "Why did you try to kill yourself, Addison? Was it because of the divorce?"

Addison took a deep breath. "Not really, it was just everything that happened when we moved."

"Like what?" She shrugged and went back to painting. Peter sighed, deciding to drop the subject for a while. "How about pizza?"

"Okay." She nodded.

"Still only like a margarita?"

"With mushrooms."

"Okay. Why don't you take a shower and I'll go and order the pizzas?" Addison nodded and walked into her bathroom, locking the door behind her.

Half an hour later and they sat eating their pizzas, watching a film. Addison curled her legs underneath her and kept her arms covered. She didn't want her dad seeing her scars, she didn't want anyone seeing her scars, she didn't even want to look at them.

"Why haven't you got any photos up?" Addison turned to look at her dad.

Peter shrugged. "I guess, it didn't feel like a proper home without you, so I never bothered to put any up."

"Oh, okay then."

"Maybe you can help me put some up tomorrow?"

"Okay, that sounds good."

--

The next morning, Addison knelt down in the attic with her dad, the two of them surrounded by boxes, some open and some still taped shut. They'd been looking for about an hour already, but had yet to find any photos. She grabbed the next box, grinning when she saw what was inside. "Here's some photos." She picked up one and looked at it.

"You were about an hour were about an hour old there." Peter glanced over her shoulder and smiled. "I was so proud."

"Was mom?" Her voice was quiet as she asked the question, not sure if she wanted to know the answer.

"Your mother..." He chose his words carefully. "Doesn't convey her emotions easily, but she does love you."

"Then why doesn't she show it?"

"She's too scared to I guess." Addison nodded and pulled out another photo. "That was your first birthday, you wore more of your cake than you ate." He smiled widely. "Your mother seemed to enjoy that day, and you toddled after her wherever she went."

"Oh."

"The two of you were always together that day." Addison looked at the photo for a little longer before they went through the rest of the box, stories being told for each one, before they decided which ones were to be put up and where.

Three hours later and they had gone through every box of photos in the attic, and some photos were piled up separately ready to be taken down. Addison handed them to her dad and looked around. A letter placed on the floor caught her eye and she picked it up. She was just about to open it when her dad called up. "That the last of them?"

"Yeah." She quickly slipped it into her pocket and climbed down the ladder.

"Shall we put then up then?"

"Yeah, okay." She smiled and picked up a box, it was full of the photos she wanted put up in her bedroom. "I'll go put these up." Addison turned and walked to her room, setting the box on the floor and taking out the photos, trying to decide where they all should sit.

Another two hours later and all the photos had been put up around the house and Addison was pleased with it all. "Pasta alright for dinner Ads?"

"Yeah thanks dad." She smiled and sat down, looking at the photos above the mantle piece. Now it looked like a home.


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: Okay, so here is the next chap for you, hope you all like it. I really need to say thxs to my beta Beth b/c well she just makes it better for you guys, b/c i suck at spelling and grammer at times. Thanks once again to Emily for giving me ideas, you two girls rock!!

Enjoy

* * *

Addison sat in her bed that night and opened the letter carefully. She knew she probably shouldn't read it, but for some reason she needed to. Slowly she unfolded the piece of paper and began to read. Tears stung the back of her eyes as she read. It was a letter from her father to her mother, explaining about his life, his life that was similar to hers.

Peter used to self harm when he was a teenager; he may not have self harmed in the same way as Addison, but he did self harm. He had been bullied at school and had turned to self harm to make himself him feel better. It had only lasted six months, but it had stayed with him his whole life. Peter had stopped self harming when he had met Joanna, he didn't want anything to ruin being with her. It was one thing he had never told her about his life.

Addison closed the letter and wiped away the tears that had fallen down her cheeks. She wondered if she should tell him how she'd turned to self harming the same way he had; he would understand, he had been there himself. She couldn't tell him about Steve though, she couldn't tell anyone.

She put the letter beck in the envelope and placed it in the drawer of her night stand, planning to put it back in the attic the next day. Addison turned off her light and snuggled down into bed, still wondering if she should talk to him. She sighed, choosing to decide the next day, and finally let her eyes close and she drifted off to sleep.

--

The next day Addison stretched as she awoke and rubbed the sleep from her eyes. She sat up and ran a hand through her hair, dealing with the mess slightly. Her scars caught her eye and she ran her fingers lightly over them, they were still slightly fresh and she sighed. She needed to stop, she needed a reason to stop.

Slowly she got out of bed and picked up a jacket, pulling it on over her pyjamas, she wasn't going to show her dad her scars just yet. Addison picked up her hair brush, brushing her hair out of the mess it was in, before leaving the room and heading downstairs.

All was quiet and she called out to her dad, getting no response. Addison frowned and walked into the kitchen, finding a note on the side.

_Having friends round for lunch, gone out to get something nice to eat, be ready for 12!_

_Dad_

She placed the note back on the side and looked at the clock, it was 10:30. She didn't want company, she just wanted time with her dad. Addison sighed and made herself some toast and filled a glass with water before sitting down and tucking into her breakfast.

--

Addison was helping Peter put the finishing touches on lunch as the doorbell rang. "Can you answer that for me Ads?"

"Sure." She wiped her hands clean before she left the kitchen and walked to the door, slowly opening it to reveal a woman, four girls, and a boy standing outside.

"Hi." The woman smiled. "You must be Addison, you've grown so much!" Addison looked at the woman, she had no idea who she was.

"Kathryn!" Peter smiled widely as he approached the door and pulled the woman into a hug. "So nice to see you again."

"It's good to see you too, and Addison has grown into a beautiful young lady."

He smiled and turned to Addison. "This is an old friend of mine, Kathryn, you met once when you were about three, you and Derek spent the day playing together." Addison still couldn't remember this. "Anyway, come in, come in." They all walked into the hallway and Addison shut the door. "Your lot has certainly grown as well." He chuckled.

"They have." Kathryn smiled. "You remember Derek."

"Hi." Derek held out his hand and Peter shook it.

"Then there's, Nancy, Kathleen and the twins, Emily and Beth."

"They're all going to break some hearts when they're older."

"Oh they are." Kathryn nodded in agreement.

"Go on through to the living room, can I get you anything to drink?" Addison looked at the girls and noted they were all younger than her and looked alike, and like their mother. Then her gaze travelled to Derek, he stood tall and was quite handsome, he resembled his sisters and his mother. She could tell he was the oldest and older than her.

They all moved into the living room and sat down. Addison kept quiet and observed it all, she didn't really feel like talking. She sat back and played with the cuff of her jumper. It may have been hot but she wasn't going to show her arms to complete strangers.

"I'll just go and get lunch." Peter stood up.

"Let me help." Kathryn stood as well.

"No, there's no need for you to do that."

"You cooked, it's the least I can do." She smiled and they walked into the kitchen. Silence settled over them and Addison was happy to sit like that rather than try to make conversation.

"So what are we actually having for lunch?" Emily screwed her nose up in thought. "I hope it's something nice."

"Emily." Derek scolded. "Don't be so rude."

"I'm not the one who didn't want to come in the first place." Derek frowned.

"So." Nancy turned to Addison. "You're Addison right?" She nodded. "Cool, I'm Nancy, I'm the best out of the lot of us." She smiled. "Ouch!" Kathleen thumped her sister in the arm. "No need to hit me!"

"Just stop fighting, we're not at home anymore, wait until we get back before killing each other." Derek sighed and looked at Addison. "Sorry about them, they are constantly arguing."

"We are not!"

"Lunch." Peter called and they moved into the dining room, each finding a place and sitting down. Peter sat at the head of the table, with Kathryn one side and Addison the other. Derek had ended up sitting next to Addison with Beth on his other side, and Nancy, Kathleen and Emily sat on the other side, down from Kathryn. "Enjoy." They smiled and began eating. Peter and Kathryn started a conversation and the sisters began one as well, leaving Addison and Derek.

"So…" He started.

"You don't have to talk to me you know." She took a mouthful of her food.

"But I want to."

"I thought you didn't even want to come here?"

"Well, I didn't at first…"

"There you go then." Addison stopped talking and gave her attention to her food. Derek sighed and did the same.

After lunch Addison was loading the dishwasher while Peter and Kathryn sat in the lounge drinking coffee and chatting, the girls were in the garden and she had no idea where Derek was, until he walked in and began talking again. "Want some help?"

"No, I'm fine thank you." She placed the rest in the dish washer and shut it, turning it on.

"Okay then." He smiled. "So?" He put his hands in his pockets and shifted slightly as once again silence settled over them.

"You don't have to talk to me, I'm fine on my own."

"But I want to talk to you, we're going to be here for a while, and we don't live that far either." He shrugged. "I'm Derek."

"I know."

"So…how old are you?"

"Sixteen."

"Same here." Silence again. "So why haven't I seen you around before?"

"I live with my mom."

"Oh, okay, so you only come here on weekends?"

"This the first weekend I've stayed."

"Okay." Derek felt slightly awkward now, he didn't know what to talk about. "Any siblings?"

"No."

"Okay." He nodded. She wasn't exactly making the situation any easier.

"I'm going to go upstairs." Addison turned and left the kitchen, making him sigh.

--

Addison shut her door after her and peeled off her jumper, it was too hot to keep it on anymore. She looked out her window at the four girls in the garden. They were all enjoying themselves and she sighed, walking back to her bed and sitting down. She picked up her book and began to read, trying to ignore her arms.

Addison had really gotten in the story when her bedroom door opened and Derek walked in. Her head snapped up and looked at him. "Sorry I thought this was the bathroom…." His gaze travelled to the scars on her arms and she froze. Her jumper was the other side of the room and she had nothing to cover her arms. She quickly dropped the book and folded her arms, trying to hide the scars. "Addison…" He began.

"It's nothing."

"It's not nothing." He shut the door and walked further in.

"It's nothing." She tried again

"It's not, those scars are not nothing, they're something, and I'm guessing you did it to yourself." He gently took hold of one of her arms and looked at the scars. Addison wanted to pull her arms away but couldn't. "Why did you do it?" He looked up at her.

"I felt better." Her voice was quiet and she looked down.

"What made you do it though? Why did cutting make you feel better?"

"Life," He waited for her to continue. "My parents spilt up and neither seemed to want me." She shrugged. "And my, so-called-boyfriend…" She drifted off, knowing she shouldn't tell him, but wanting to open up to someone more than anything.

"Why, what did he do to you?" Addison was silent. "Addison?"

"He…he, hit me and…made me do things, that I didn't want to do." She looked down and felt the tears prickling at the back of her eyes.

"He shouldn't have done that." Derek lifted her chin up so she looked at him. "I'm sorry to hear that, but there are better things to do than hurt yourself you know."

"I want to stop…I need a reason to stop." Derek sighed and looked at her. She didn't deserve to be hurt.

"You need to tell someone about your boyfriend."

"I told you."

"Your parents."

"No," She shook her head. "I'm never telling them about Steve."

"Why not?"

"Just no." Addison looked at him through tears.

"Okay then, you should break up with him though."

"I want to get away, move here, away from him."

"Why don't you then."

She shrugged. "My mom has custody or something."

"Oh."

"Yeah." Silence settled over them and Derek ran his thumb gently over her arm. "You don't have to worry about me." Addison pulled her arm away and stood up, pulling her jumper back on.

He sighed and watched her. "You should talk to someone."

"I did, to you."

"Someone else." He stood up.

"I don't need to, I'll move here and it'll be fine." She shrugged.

"It won't go away just like that." Addison turned her back to him and shrugged again. Derek sighed. "I'll go, we're going home soon." She just nodded. "I'll see you around?" She made no acknowledgement to him, and he just left, leaving her alone.

Derek was not in my original plan for this story, but once I started writing this chapter, he appeared, I was not amused but eh refused to leave, so he's here, whether I want him here or not. Hope you guys are happy.


	10. Chapter 10

A/N: So here is the nxt chapter for you all, I was really hoping when I got back online after being in a show all week I'd have more than one review for the last chapter, but I didn't.

This chapter deals with a bit of abuse and like rape.

Enjoy

* * *

Addison sighed as she sat in a room with her parents and their lawyers once again. And they were arguing once again. This time however, they both wanted Addison to live with them. She turned her music on again and let her head rest on the table. She thought it would have been easier this time, but apparently not. Addison closed her eyes trying to block it all out.

"Addison? Addison? Addison!" Her head snapped up as she heard her mother's voice calling her. "We asked you a question." Joanna looked angry.

"Sorry." She removed her earphones.

"We were asking who you would rather live with, your mother or father?" One of the lawyers looked at her.

"I have the choice?"

"Yes."

"Oh." She looked between her parents. "My dad…" Peter smiled and Joanna looked slightly angry and relieved.

"Okay then, you can start to move in with him then." The lawyer smiled, happy it was all sorted.

--

A few days later and Addison was packing the rest of her clothes, then she would be completely moved into her dad's. She was happy and would be moving schools as it was too far to travel everyday. She put the last of her clothes in her suitcase as the doorbell rang. Quickly she made her way down the stairs and came face to face with Steve.

"Hello there," He smiled and walked in. "Where have you been?"

"I spent the weekend at my dads."

"Well then you have a lot to make up for." He took a step closer to her and shut the front door. "Come on now."

"No." She shook her head.

Anger flashed in his eyes and he raised his fist, pushing it into her face, knocking her to the ground. Her hands flew to her face cradling it. "You don't say no to me." He hissed at her and grabbed her wrist tightly, pulling her up from the floor. He pushed her into the lounge and onto the couch. "What I want I get." He pulled her skirt and panties down before pulling his jeans and boxers down, sliding into her.

Addison squeezed her eyes shut and just waited for it to be over. She tried to think of something else instead, something nice, but couldn't.

Steve pulled out of her and pulled up his boxers and jeans again. "Never say no to me again." He left the house and the tears fell. Addison pulled her skirt and panties back on before going upstairs and wiping away the tears, trying to cover the bruise that was forming around her eye.

Half an hour later and Peter arrived, smiling at her as she opened the door. "What happened?" His face dropped as he saw her eye.

"I walked into a door." She shrugged it off. "My clothes are all packed now."

Peter didn't believe her, but decided not to push just yet. He picked up her suitcases and put them in the boot of the car. "Ready then?"

"Yeah." She nodded her head and shut the front door behind her, and got into the passenger's seat. She didn't look back.

--

Addison lay in her bed that night and stared up at the ceiling. She knew her dad didn't believe her about her eye, but she didn't care, she still wouldn't tell him, she wouldn't tell anyone. Sighing she turned on her side and closed her eyes, wanting to sleep. It wasn't long until she had drifted off to sleep.

--

The next day, Addison awoke to chatter coming from downstairs. She recognised the voice as Kathryn's from before. Addison yawned and stretched, just lying in her bed. After a few minutes she got out of bed and brushed her hair, looking into the mirror. There was a small knock at her door. "Yes?" She called and her door opened, and Derek stepped in.

"Oh." He stopped and looked at her. "I didn't know…" They just stood starting at each other, not saying anything. Suddenly Derek began to feel a bit uncomfortable. "I'll erm go back downstairs and wait." He turned around and shut her door. Addison let out a sigh and walked to her bathroom and took a quick shower.

Fifteen minutes later and Addison walked into the back garden and sat down next to Derek on the garden bench. "Hey." She looked ahead of her.

"Hey. So I hear you've moved in permanently here then."

"Yeah." She nodded. "I have."

"You're moving schools as well aren't you?" She nodded. "You're moving to mine, I've been told to look after you until you settle in."

"Oh, okay then."

"If you need anything, even to talk," He turned to look at her. "I'm here."

"Thanks." She nodded.

Derek just watched her for a while. "What happened to your eye?"

She looked down, it was too hard to cover completely. "He hit me." She whispered.

"You should tell your dad, tell the police."

"No." Addison shook her head. "I can't, I just want him out of my life forever."

"Okay, do you ever want to talk?"

"Not here, not with my dad around."

"Okay." Derek nodded. "We could go for a walk, I could show you about a bit as well." Addison nodded and stood up. Derek followed and they left the house, walking towards the park.

Addison looked around her as they entered the park, it was so calming and beautiful. "Wow, the parks aren't this nice where I lived." She smiled.

"Well we just have something special here." He smiled.

"You do." She smiled as well. "It's nice here."

"It is, do you want to sit down and talk?"

"Okay." They chose a bench and sat down, looking around them before the silence was broken.

"So?" Derek turned to her. "Why did he hit you?"

Addison looked down. "He wanted sex and I said no." Derek just looked at her. "I said no so he hit me. He hit me and got what he wanted anyway."

"He, he?" She just nodded. "You have to tell someone."

"No." She turned to look at him.

"You have to, otherwise it'll get worse."

"No, you don't know what it's like…"

"I do, I do know what it's like." He looked at her. "A few years after my dad died, my mom got a new boyfriend, and it was great at first, until he started to hit her, I was seven at the time, I remember it all. You have to tell someone."

She shook her head sadly. "He said if I told anyone he'd make my life hell."

"He can't reach you now."

"No, I just want to forget it, I never want to see him again, I'm sorry, I just can't." Tears rolled down her cheeks.

"Okay, I know it's hard." He pulled her into a hug, letting her cry. "You didn't deserve it, no one does." He ran a hand over her back.


	11. Chapter 11

A/N: Here is the next chapter for you guys, thanks to my amazing beta Beth for beta-ing, thaxs hun!! And a big thanks to Emily for helping me with this fic!!

Enjoy

* * *

A few days later Addison decided to take a walk in the park and clear her head. She hadn't been feeling that great and thought the fresh air would do her some good. It was a nice place and she felt relaxed there. She smiled to herself as she walked along. She had decided to venture further this time. If she got lost she would just ring Derek.

They had become close in the space of two days. He could relate to her problems and she found herself talking to him, telling him what had happened, and he had convinced her to stop cutting, and that's what she was trying to do. Addison felt that a walk was needed so that was what she was doing.

She turned a corner and strolled along happily. She was finally happy and relaxed, then she heard a familiar voice. "Hello Addison." Addison turned to see him stood there with a smug look on his face. "You can run but you can't hide." Steve stepped towards her. "Now I'm a little hurt you never told me you were leaving. I'm your boyfriend and you never even told me, that's a bit harsh don't you think? I mean we shared something special."

"There was nothing special about it." Addison glared at him.

"There was." He smirked and took a step closer to her.

"No." She shook her head.

"What have I told you about saying no to me?" Anger flashed in his eyes and he clenched his hand into a fist, swinging it towards her, but she ducked and he punched the wall, crying out in pain. He looked at her angrily and Addison quickly turned, running back home, away from Steve.

Addison ran as fast as she could, she didn't dare look back to see if he was behind her. She dodged the few people she met and ran towards Derek's house, knowing her dad was not in.

By the time she had reached Derek's she was out of breath. She quickly knocked on the door, hoping someone would answer soon. Addison looked around making sure he hadn't followed as the door opened and Derek stood there.

"Addison." She quickly walked in and shut the door behind her. He watched her, concerned. "What's wrong?"

"He. He. He found me." She tried to catch her breath.

"Who?" Derek was confused.

"Steve." Addison took deep breaths and looked at him. "He wanted…"

"It's okay, you're safe now, he can't touch you here." He pulled Addison into his arms and held her tightly. "It'll be okay," he whispered.

A sudden feeling swept over Addison and she pushed off Derek, running up the stairs and into the bathroom. He saw the look in her eyes. "Addison, no." He ran after her, but she'd locked the bathroom door after her. "Addison." He banged on the door. "Don't do this."

Addison tried to ignore the pleas that came from the other side of the door. She searched frantically in the cupboard for a razor or anything sharp she could use to cut, anything, she wanted anything. Tears began to roll down her cheeks as she searched and found nothing.

"Addison, please, let me in. Please don't do this to yourself. Please." He let his head rest against the door. "Please." He sighed. Inside the room, Addison continued to search, desperate to cut. There was nothing. "Addison please!"

Derek continued to plead with her from the other side of the door. He was afraid of what she might do. From what she had told him, she would actually kill herself if it made her feel better. He looked around before he realised the only way was to kick the door down. Derek took a step back before he rammed his shoulder into the door.

Addison jumped as she heard him trying to get into her. She stopped searching and turned to face the door. "Addison, let me in, don't make me break the door down."

Derek moved back again before his shoulder hit the door again and he felt it ease, but too much and it swung open, letting him fall to the floor. Addison jumped back and looked at him. "Are you okay?" He looked up at her worried and she just nodded slightly. "You haven't??" He sat up quickly scanning her arms.

"No."

"Good." He stood up in front of her and took hold of her hands. "Please don't do that again, please don't cut, talk, just talk to me, let your emotions out, scream, throw things, but please don't cut." Addison looked into his eyes and saw the tears shining there. "Please."

She nodded. "Okay." Her voice was small.

"Thank you." He pulled her into his arms. She buried her head into his shoulder and wrapped her arms around his neck while he held her tightly. "I'm not going to let him hurt you anymore." Derek just wished this guy would leave Addison alone, he'd do anything to keep her safe.

--

Derek set a cup of tea down on the table in front of Addison. She was sat on the couch in the lounge just staring ahead of her. Derek sat down next to her and took hold of her hand, just watching her. His thumb soothingly rubbed her knuckle and she continued to stare in front of her. "Addison?" He tried after a few minutes. She slowly turned to look at him. "Are you okay?"

"I thought I wouldn't have to see him again." Her voice was quiet. "I thought he wouldn't be able to hurt me or make me feel like this again, but I was wrong." Tears glistened in her eyes.

"He's not going to hurt you again, I won't let him, ever."

"But you don't even know me properly…"

"I know that, but you don't deserve this, and I want to get to know you. I want to be your friend, someone you can turn to." Derek gave her a reassuring smile. Addison nodded and turned away again. He sighed and looked at her before he pulled her into his arms again. "It'll get better." Addison didn't reply, she just let him hold her and gripped his top tightly, needing to be held.

--

Derek buried his head into his hands as his sisters told another embarrassing story about him to Addison, who was now smiling. She was laughing at the story and he groaned, letting his head drop to the table. "And there's that time he came home from school crying because he had called the teacher mommy!"

"No, I didn't!" he yelled at his sisters.

"You did!" Nancy nodded. "You were crying your eyes out and all the boys were making fun of you."

"I wasn't! I really wasn't." He turned to Addison and saw her smiling widely, making him smile.

"You did, just ask mom."

"No, I know I didn't, you're just making it up now."

"No we're not."

"Dinner!" Kathryn called from the kitchen and they all made their way into the dining room. Peter was out of town and wasn't going to get back until late, so Kathryn has offered to let Addison have dinner with them.

They all sat down and began to eat once everyone had a plate in front of them. The conversation stayed light, and Addison joined in occasionally. She was content to just sit and listen as a light banter took place between the siblings.

"So, Addison, how are you enjoying the place?" Kathryn smiled at her.

"It's nice here, really relaxed, I think I'll enjoy it here."

"I'm sure you will." She smiled. "If you ever need anything, don't hesitate to ask any of us, we'll be more than willing to help, and Derek will look after you once you start school, make sure you know your way around and all." Kathryn smiled at Derek.

"Thank you." Addison smiled at them gratefully.

After dinner Kathryn put the girls in charge of washing up and drying. Addison felt like she should help in some way but Kathryn wouldn't let her do anything. Derek had smiled and said the same thing. "Why don't you stay the night here? Your dad won't be back until late."

"I should really go home." She didn't want to run the risk of them seeing her arms, it just wasn't something they needed to know. "I'll be fine, thank you for dinner." Addison stood up.

"Derek will walk you home."

"Yeah." He stood up as well and noticed the 'stay with her tonight so she's not on her own' look his mother was wearing. He had told her that she hadn't had an easy life but he gave no details. Kathryn wanted to make her feel as welcomed as possible, and knew Derek would take great care of her, he had seemed to develop a sense of care over her.

"Let her borrow a jacket to wear home, it's a bit chilly out. I'll see you again, Addison." Kathryn smiled and left the dining room, walking into the kitchen.

"Come on, I'll walk you home." They walked into the hallway and Derek let Addison borrow a jacket and he pulled one on himself. He turned to face Addison and smiled.

"What?"

"Nothing." He shook his head. "You just look cute in my jacket, it's too big for you."

"Oh." She smiled. "It's nice and warm though."

"It's my favourite jacket." He smiled. "Come on." He held the door open for her and she walked out. Addison shivered a bit and pulled the jacket tighter around her. "Cold?" Derek looked at her.

"A bit."

"The jacket should keep you warm." Addison nodded and pulled it tighter. "Although it is a bit big for you." He chuckled slightly.

"You gave it to me to wear."

"I did." He smiled again. "Come here." He wrapped an arm around her and pulled her close. "That warmer?"

"Yes, thanks." Addison smiled and leaned into his touch, glad for the warmth in the chill night air. They walked along together until they reached her front door. She pulled out her key, opened the door and they walked into her hallway. "Thank you for walking me home." She smiled at him.

"No problem, will you be alright here on you own? Or do you want me to crash on the couch or something so you're not alone?"

"Would you mind staying?" Addison bit her lip nervously.

"No." He smiled. "Only if you're comfortable with it?" She nodded. "Okay then, I'll crash on the couch."

"You can use the guest room."

"Okay." Addison led him upstairs and into the guest room, where they said their goodnights and Addison retreated to her own room, where it didn't take long for her to fall asleep.

--

Addison woke up screaming and sweating. She opened her eyes and saw Derek sat on her bed, watching her with a worried look on his face. "Hey, calm down. It's okay, it was only a dream. Calm down, I'm here." Addison took deep breaths and looked at him. "It's okay, it was only a dream."

"He, he, he tried to…but…you were…and he….then…"

"Shh, okay, I'm here, it'll be okay." He soothed her, taking her hand in his.

"Don't leave me." She asked.

"I won't, just try and sleep now." Addison nodded and looked at him. "Sleep." He shifted so she could still hold his hand and he was lying down next to her. "Just sleep, I'm right here." She turned on her side so she was facing him and moved closer. Derek wrapped his arm around her and pulled her close.

Addison wasn't sure if this was the right thing, but she felt so safe with Derek. It was different than being with Steve, she could sense that Derek would never hurt her on purpose. She felt so relaxed laying in his arms. It wasn't long until she had drifted off to sleep.


	12. Chapter 12

A/N: So here is the next chapter for you, hope you like. I have to give a really big thanks to my beta Beth, she made me laugh so much with her comments, she IS going to write a little fic of how Diane and Steve and all them die, seriosuly her comments were so funny, so thanks for the laugh hin you rock!! Big thanks to Emily b/c well she jsut gives me loads of idea, thanks hun!! Love you!!

Enjoy

* * *

Addison slowly awoke the next day and felt two arms around her. Her instant thought was Steve and she began to panic, trying to move out of his arms. She tried pushing him away making Derek wake up instantly. "What's going on? What's wrong?" He looked at Addison in concern. "Addison?" She tried to push him away again and Derek loosened his arms. "Addison it's okay, it's only me." He looked at her.

Addison looked up at him, realising that it wasn't Steve who had hold of her. "I…I thought you were Steve. I thought it was him who had hold of me."

"Shh, it's only me, and I'm not going to hurt you, I'll go if you want me to." Addison shook her head. "Okay, are you alright though?"

"Yeah, I just panicked a bit there."

"It's okay, did you sleep well?"

"Yeah, I did, thanks. Did you?" She looked up at him.

"I did." He smiled.

"Good." Addison just lay on her side facing him, and he did the same facing her. She gave a small yawn and let her eyes close again.

"Still tired?" He asked.

"Yeah, I'll just sleep a little longer…" Addison moved closer to him again, and he moved his arms to around her once more. He smiled down at her and watched as she fell back asleep once more.

--

Addison awoke again a few hours later and stretched, smiling to herself. She opened her eyes and turned to the space next to her, expecting to see Derek, but it was empty. She sat up and looked around her, before getting out of bed, opening the door and walking down the stairs. Addison looked into the lounge before she smelt cooking and she walked into the kitchen, smiling as she saw Derek there.

"Hey." She walked towards him.

"Hey." Derek smiled at her. "Sleep well?"

"Yeah thanks. What are you cooking?" She looked over his shoulder.

"Pancakes."

"Yum." She smiled. "Can you flip them?"

"Of course." He smirked.

"Go on then."

"Okay." Derek took a tight hold of the pan before he lifted it, flipping the pancake, letting it land back in the pan. Addison smiled and clapped. "Your turn now."

"Me?" She just looked at him. "I can't flip a pancake."

"Go on, give it a go."

"No, I can't."

"I'll show you. Come here, stand in front of me." Addison did what he'd asked. "Right, hold the handle of the pan tightly." She took hold of it like he'd said and he wrapped his hands over the top of hers. She felt a tingle run through her body. Derek stood behind Addison, her back pressed against his front, his arms around her and his hands on top of hers, tightly on the handle of the pan. "Ready?" He asked into her ear and all she could do was nod. "Okay, move with me." They lifted the pan up, and flipped the pancake. Addison just looked stunned and Derek smirked. "Didn't think you could, huh?"

"No." She shook her head. "But I wouldn't have been able to do that if you hadn't have done it with me."

"True, but with practice you'll be able to flip a pancake." He smiled at her. "How many pancakes would you like?"

"I don't mind."

"Want to help me make the rest and flip them?" Derek raised an eyebrow.

"Okay." She didn't feel like moving from his arms, just yet. They continued to make a few more pancakes, so they'd four each, before they sat down at the island and began to eat. It was the first time Addison hadn't bothered to cover her arms up, and she was surprised that Derek wasn't that bothered in them, he didn't look at her differently.

"Any plans for today?" he asked breaking the silence.

"No, you?" She looked up at him as she finished eating.

"Nope, just spending the day with you." Derek smiled at her.

"Okay." She was happy to be spending the whole day with him. "Anything in particular you want to do, then?" She stood up and took the plates to the dishwasher.

"Nope, you?"

"Not really."

"How about I take you to a theme park?" Derek smiled.

"Okay, sounds fun."

"Good. I'll go home and change and come back to pick you up, you might want to wear your hair back though." He smirked.

"Okay." Addison smiled.

"See you in a bit." Derek left the house and Addison walked upstairs to get ready.

--

Half an hour later Derek stood at Addison's front door ringing her doorbell. He heard movement before the door was opened and Addison stood there, wearing cropped jeans and a tight fitting top with a wrap top over her arms, so her scars were covered but she wouldn't get too hot. "You look nice." He commented.

"Thanks." She blushed. "You don't look bad either."

Derek smiled. "Let's go then." Addison smiled as well and stepped out of the house, locking the door behind her. "I hope you're not afraid of heights."

"No, I'm not."

"Good." He smiled and offered her his arm, which she took. "Let's go then." They made their way to the theme park.

--

"What about this ride?" Derek smiled at Addison who just looked scared.

"You want me to go on that?!" She pointed to the ride and watched the people scream on it.

"Come on, it'll be fun." He smirked and dragged her to the line.

"You can't be serious, it's just so…"

"It'll be fun." They stepped forward as more people were let on for the next go. "We'll be next, after this one I mean." He just smiled as he watched Addison watch the ride.

"But it's just so tall!" The ride stood tall in the air, and you sat around in a square facing out. It would shoot you up then bring you back down and repeat it for a while, before it held you at the very top, then without warning bring you back down.

"Don't worry, it'll be fun." Addison just looked at him. "Come on." He pulled her along as it was their turn to get on the ride. They sat next to each other; Addison gripped hold of the bar tightly though they were strapped in securely. "Don't hold it too tight, or your hand will go numb." He found this amusing.

"Fine." She let go slightly. They heard the countdown begin for them to be shot upwards. Addison let out a loud scream along with many other people as the ride started, making Derek chuckle. She grabbed hold of his hand and held onto it for dear life, screaming as well.

Once they had stopped at the top, he turned to look at her. "Having fun?"

"I am going to hurt you when I get off this bloody ride."

"Okay." He smirked and felt her grip on his hand tightened as the ride dropped them.

Once they were off the ride Addison turned to Derek and smacked him slightly in the chest. "Ouch! What was that for?"

"Making me go on that ride!"

"Oh, come on, you liked it, even if you were screaming." He chuckled again, but she just looked at him. "So you didn't like it then?"

"I'm never letting you bring me to a theme park again." She pouted.

"Aww why not?" He smiled and moved closer to her.

"Because you make me go on scary rides!"

He laughed and wrapped his arm around her pulling her close. "I know you loved it really." She turned to look at him pouting, making him smile at her expression. "It wasn't that bad." He looked down into her eyes, and she felt herself starting to drown in his. Everything stopped around them, and she slowly stood on tiptoes, inching her face closer to his. Derek felt her breath hit his lips, and he moved his face closer to hers.

Suddenly out of no where someone came running past and knocked into Addison, sending her flying to Derek's arms where he caught her before she could hurt herself. "Are you okay?" He looked down at her, the moment broken.

"Yeah, I am, thanks." She stood up properly but Derek kept a hold of her arms.

"People should look where they're going, he could have hurt you."

"I'm alright."

"Come on, let's go get something to eat."

--

A while later, they stood at a stall, with Derek trying to win a prize. He shot all that he needed to shoot, and won a big teddy bear. "Thank you." He smiled and took the bear from the stall holder and turned to Addison. "Here." He gave her the teddy.

"No, you won it, you keep it, or give it to one of your sisters."

"No, I won it for you." He smiled.

"Thank you." She smiled and took the bear, hesitating before she pecked his cheek. He smiled back at her and took hold of her hand.

"Let's go get some candyfloss." Derek pulled her towards the cotton candy stall and bought them some. "Enjoy." He smiled and took a bite of his. Addison smiled and did the same. They slowly walked away from the stall. "Erm." He stopped them. "You have a bit, right there." He wiped the corner of her mouth where the cotton candy was, leaving his thumb there, gently brushing her lips. Addison just looked up into his eyes, and felt herself drowning in them again. Slowly Derek lowered his lips to hers, and softly kissed her. Addison kissed him back gently, her cotton candy falling to the floor as she wrapped that arm around his neck, while his arms moved to around her waist.

After a while they pulled back, and Derek let his forehead rest against hers. Neither knew what to say, so just looked at each other. "I dropped my cotton candy." She smiled at him.

"It's okay, you can share mine."

Diane stood back and watched as Addison kissed this other boy, she was going straight to Steve and tell him, technically, Addison hadn't broken up with him, so therefore, was still his girlfriend. She got her phone out of her pocket and dialled Steve's number, watching Addison the whole time.

"Any other rides you want to go on?" Derek asked and wrapped an arm around her waist.

"Not really."

He nodded and ate some cotton candy. "Want some?" He offered it to her.

"Please." She took a bite and smiled at him.

"We could go catch a movie later if you want to?"

"Sure, I want to see Mamma Mia, it looks good." She smiled and he rolled his eyes. "It's not that bad."

"Whatever you say."

"Why hello there." They turned around to see Steve stood there smugly. "Now I have a question for you buddy, what are you doing kissing MY girlfriend?"

"I'm not your girlfriend anymore."

"I don't remember breaking up with you." He took a step towards her and Derek pulled her back and stood in front of her.

"You don't get to touch her anymore." Derek glared at Steve.

"You don't get to say who I get to touch and don't, she's MY girlfriend not yours, so back off mate."

"No, I'm not going to let you hurt her again, ever." Derek made sure Addison was behind him and that Steve couldn't reach her.

"Want a bet?"

"I'm not letting you touch her again." Derek stood taller than Steve and could easily take him in a fight.

"We'll just see about that." Steve took a step towards Derek and clenched his hand into a fist.

Derek pushed Addison back a bit so she wouldn't get hurt. "Go on then." Steve pulled his hand back and swung it towards Derek, who grabbed it and twisted his arm behind his back. "You don't get to touch her." Steve tried to pull his arm away but yelped out in pain. "Now leave us alone." Derek pushed him away and walked back to Addison, pulling her close again. "Come on, let's go." They walked out of the theme park, leaving Steve behind.

Addison just held the teddy close and walked next to Derek. He looked down at her and just pulled her closer, hoping that Steve wouldn't bother her again. "Let's go home." He checked to make sure Steve wasn't following and tightened his grip around Addison.


	13. Chapter 13

A/N: I am so sorry I didn't update last Sunday but this wasn't beta-ed and then the email it was sent in I never recieved so I am very sorry I made you wait, but if Ican, and the chap is beta-ed, I'll update the next chap tonight, but it's not a promise. Thanks to Beth for beta-ing, love you hin xxx.

Enjoy!

* * *

"Do you want me to stay with you until your dad gets home?" Derek asked Addison as they walked into her hallway.

"I don't know." She walked into the lounge and sat down on the couch, Derek close behind her.

"You shouldn't be alone right now." Derek sat next to her and took hold of her hand again.

"My dad's away again tonight."

"Come and stay with us. My mom with mother you, my sisters can tell you more embarrassing stories about me." He gave her a smile and got a small one in return. "Get some stuff and we'll go to mine."

"Okay." She nodded and stood up, walking up the stairs.

--

Half an hour later and Addison sat at the Shepherd's dining room table and was eating dinner with them. She smiled at the friendly banter, it made her feel more relaxed. Derek rolled his eyes at his sisters and smiled when he saw the look on Addison's face.

"So did you have fun today?" Kathryn looked at Derek and Addison.

"Well, I thought we did, but she says she won't let me take her again." He smirked.

"You made me go on that ride!"

"What ride?"

"Erm, Big Ben I think it was called."

"And you liked it really Ads." He rolled his eyes at her. "Even if you spent most of your time screaming."

"You would of if you had been made to go on it as well." She pouted.

"Whatever you say." He smirked and sat back in his chair. Kathryn shook her head at them and began to clean up, with help from the girls.

"I think I'll go take a bath." Addison stood up.

"I'll get you some towels." Derek smiled and stood up as well, following Addison up the stairs and getting her some clean towels, as she ran a bath. "Here." He smiled as he handed her the towels.

"Thanks." She smiled back at him.

"If you need anything, just shout."

"Will do." Derek smiled before leaving the bathroom and shutting the door behind him. Addison turned to the bath and stripped, before getting into the water.

--

About half an hour later, Derek walked past the bathroom and heard a scream. Immediately after the door opened, and Addison ran out. "What's wrong?" His voice was full of concern.

"There's a spider in there." She pointed to the bathroom.

"Where?" Derek walked in and Addison followed, pointing.

"There!"

"That?" He chuckled. "It's tiny."

"I don't care, I hate spiders!"

"Okay." He bent down and picked the spider up from the mat, before opening the window and throwing it outside. "All gone now." He turned around and realised she was stood in front of him, in just a towel, that stopped mid thigh. Her hair was wet and stuck to her neck and she held her towel up against her body safely. She just looked back at him, and he felt his jeans starting to become uncomfortable.

"Thanks." She shifted on the spot, realising what she was wearing.

"No problem." Derek took a step forward, feeling his jeans tighten even more, just by looking at her. "I'll let you...umm, finish...doing, whatever." He suddenly felt her lips on his, kissing him, her arms around his neck. He wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her close, his tongue slipping into her mouth.

A cough at the door pulled them apart and Derek looked up to see his mother stood there. "Are we done with the bathroom?" She raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah…" Derek took a step back from Addison who just looked at the floor.

"Okay then." Kathryn looked at them. "Can I use it now then?"

"Yeah." Addison gathered her clothes before they left the bathroom and Kathryn walked in, shutting the door behind her. Derek looked at Addison hesitantly. "Erm…" He started unsure of what to say.

"I'm just going to get changed." She pointed and walked towards the guest room, shutting the door behind her and sliding down it. All these feelings were rushing through her body, but she didn't want to get hurt. "I'm so stupid." She whispered and closed her eyes.

Derek stood on the landing and mentally cursed himself. He shouldn't have kissed her. Wait, no, she kissed him, she started the kissing, not him, so she must have wanted it, right? He was so confused. He quickly made his way to his room, wanting to get rid of the uncomfortable-ness in his jeans.

--

A little while later, Derek knocked on Addison's door; he wanted to apologize for making her feel uncomfortable. He hadn't seen her since and wanted to make sure she was alright. He waited for a response. A small 'come in' was heard and he opened the door, stepping in and closing the door behind him. "Hey." He smiled at her.

"Hey." She sat up on the bed.

"I just wanted to apologize if I made you feel uncomfortable earlier." He sat down on the bed as well. "I shouldn't have let it happen."

"It's okay." She shrugged.

"It's not if you felt uncomfortable." Addison just looked at him, she wasn't going to let him know that she had enjoyed it. "I'll erm, go." Addison nodded and he looked at her. "Sleep well." Derek stood up.

"You too." She watched as he walked towards the door. "Derek." He turned to face her, and she got off the bed.

"Yeah?" He watched as she walked towards him and kissed him again. Her arms once again went around his neck, and his went around her waist. Her tongue pushed against his lips, until he parted them, letting her tongue slip into his mouth. She moaned slightly and pressed her body against his. He kissed her back for a while before pulling away. "We shouldn't."

Addison looked up at him and pulled away completely. "I'm sorry, I should have know you didn't mean…" She began to ramble.

"Whoa!" He took hold of her arms, making her look at him. "Who said that I wasn't interested? I just don't think we should move fast here, I don't want you feeling uncomfortable. Let's take it slow, okay?" She looked up at him and nodded. "Okay, do you want to take it slow with me? You don't have to, we don't have to do this if you don't want to, it's your choice."

Addison just looked up at him. "I don't want to get hurt." Her voice was quiet.

"I won't hurt you, I won't make you do anything you don't want to do. I'm not going to hurt you intentionally, I promise." He smiled at her.

"Okay." She nodded. "I…I want to try it, between us, I'm trusting you."

"I know, and I don't plan on hurting you, I swear." He smiled and pulled her into his arms, dropping a kiss on her hair. Addison nodded and just let him hold her, her head resting against his chest. He just wrapped his arms tightly around her and smiled, holding her close.


	14. Chapter 14

A/N: Okay so I couldn't gt this up before I went on holiday, so here it is now. I'm hoping I get get the next chap to you for Sunday. So fingers crossed. Thanks to Beth for beta-ing, love you hin.

Enjoy

* * *

"Don't worry, it'll be fine." Derek smiled at Addison and pulled her close. "I'll keep you safe, and you're in all of my classes, so you won't get lost."

"I'll only know you though."

"Doesn't matter, I'll introduce you to Mark and some of my other friends, you'll make friends in no time."

"Okay." She looked around her at the school nervously.

"It'll be fine." He bent his head and kissed her lightly on the lips. "And being my girlfriend is a bonus." He smirked.

"Why?"

He shrugged. "No one seems to mess with me or Mark, I don't know why."

"Oh okay." She smiled slightly and they walked into the school. Addison took a deep breath; she hoped Derek was right when he said it'd be okay.

---

Derek kept a hand on the small of Addison's back as he lead her into their tutor room. They were the first ones there and Miss Lambert smiled at them. "You must be Addison?" Addison nodded at her. "I'm Miss Lambert, I'll be your tutor until you leave, how are you finding BEC then?" Miss Lambert leant back against the desk in the room.

"It's okay."

"Haven't got lost yet then?"

"No, Derek's been showing me around."

"Good." She smiled. "I never had anyone showing me round when I first came here, I got lost." Addison smiled. "So, I have a timetable here for you, you'll need a planner as well." She handed them to Addison. "Write up your timetable in the back of your planner, and record any homework you get in there." She smiled. "If you have any problems you can come and see me okay?"

"Thank you." Addison smiled up at her. Miss Lambert had a kind smile that reached her eyes, and Addison felt relaxed around her. "Take a seat while we wait for the rest." Derek lead Addison to a table and they sat down, watching as the rest of the tutor group began to filter in.

----

"So how have you found it so far?" Derek looked at Addison as they walked into the canteen for lunch.

"It's been okay." She shrugged and sat down at a nearby table. He let out a small sigh and sat down as well, watching as she began eating. After a while he began eating as well.

"So you up for PE last?" He titled his head to the side and looked at her.

"I suppose." Addison shrugged again.

"Well, you have Miss Lambert, so you'll be alright. And most of the girls are alright." She nodded. "I have basketball practice after school today, you can stay and watch if you like, or you can go straight home."

"Oh…"

"It's up to you."

"Hey man." Mark slapped Derek on the back as he joined their table. "Ready for the match tonight?"

"What match?" Derek looked at him confused.

"The basketball one."

"I thought it was next week."

"Nope, it's today man." Mark leant back. "Ready for it?"

"I guess so then."

"Who's this?" Mark turned to look at Addison.

"Mark, this is Addison. Addison, meet Mark."."

"Ah." Mark smiled. "So this is the famous Addison then."

"It is." Derek smiled at her and she just looked at Mark.

"Hey there." Mark smiled at her.

"Hi."

"Mark." Derek warned, knowing his friend would try and hit on her.

"What? I haven't done anything." Mark defended himself.

"No, but you're going to."

"And why shouldn't I then?"

"Because she's my girlfriend." Derek smiled at calling Addison his girlfriend. It sounded nice to him.

Mark's jaw dropped slightly, looking from Derek to Addison. "How did you find a catch like that?"

"Our parents are old friends." He shrugged.

"Wish our parent's were," Mark mumbled, looking put out. Derek just smiled and took hold of Addison's hand across the table. Mark shook his head. "Well, I'm glad you've found someone... both of you."

"Thanks, you got a girlfriend yet?"

Mark laughed, running a hand through his hair. "Not exactly."

"Really?"

Mark nodded. "She's great and everything, but uh, she wants a serious relationship... so I'm trying to prove I can do it, and then we'll officially be dating."

"Should have known, I give you a few days before you split, you're just a manwhore." Derek smirked.

Mark looked offended, crossing his arms. "She's different, I think I really like her."

"You think or you know?"

"Hey, early days yet! But I do know she's different to the other girls... and I feel differently toward her than what I did with the others."

"Okay then." Derek smiled and ran his thumb over Addison's knuckles, making her smile at him.

Mark smiled at the sight. "I have to go, meeting Sarah for lunch."

"See ya." Derek smiled as Mark walked off. "So." He turned to Addison. "That was Mark, my best friend."

"He seems…okay."

"He's alright once you get to know him, bit of a manwhore, but he's Mark." Derek smiled.

----

Addison stood in the changing room with the other girls and looked down at her kit; there was no way she was going to be able to cover her cuts. Slowly she peeled her top off, keeping her arms hidden, before reaching for her PE top.

Miss Lambert walked in the changing room and looked around. She motioned to the others to hurry up, before glancing at Addison. "Is everything okay with school so far?"

Addison tensed, not wanting her to see her cuts. "Yeah, it's fine." She gave a smile.

"Good." Miss Lambert smiled encouragingly. "The girls are doing netball, do you know how to play?"

"Erm…I've never really played before."

"That's okay, it's easily taught." Miss Lambert scanned Addison's physique. "I think you'd be a great shooter, or even defence, you have the height for it." She stopped when her eyes rested on Addison's arm. Addison quickly tried to cover her arm, with little success.

"What's this?" Concern laced her voice as she gently took hold of Addison's arm, careful not to touch any scars.

"It's nothing." She looked down ashamed.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"It was stupid of me."

"Maybe, but something must have triggered it?" Miss Lambert sat down, waiting for Addison to follow.

Addison slowly sat down next to her and looked at the floor. "My parents divorced and neither wanted me…" She started.

"That must have been really tough, that's never easy for someone, especially teenagers."

"I ended up living with my mom, and I kind of fell into a bad crowd, they made me smoke and drink…" She felt the tears sting her eyes at the memories.

Miss Lambert leant forward, looking at Addison whilst resting her elbows on her knees. "You're safe from all that now." She smiled encouragingly.

"He found me a while ago, he wanted me to…" Tears spilled out from her eyes.

"To what?" Miss Lambert put her hand on Addison's shoulder comfortingly, willing her to go on, no matter how painful it was for Addison to relive it.

"Have sex with him again." Her voice was quiet and she looked down in shame.

"He made you do this before?" Miss Lambert uttered no judgment in her voice, as if she'd heard this before. She felt for the girl, and wanted to castrate whoever did this to her.

Addison just numbly nodded her head. "And other things. He'd hit me if I said no."

"Did you start self harming when this started?" Miss Lambert wanted to chop every limb off his body, not just his penis.

"It made me feel better."

"Did it make you feel any better when you stopped, when you woke up the next morning?" She spoke gently.

Addison shook her head. "It made me feel sick."

"So why did you carry on doing it?"

She shrugged. "I wish I hadn't."

Miss Lambert nodded. "How long since you last did it?"

"When I ended up in hospital for it."

"How long ago was that?"

"A few weeks ago

"That's good. Not that hurting yourself is good, but it's good you haven't cut since."

She nodded. "I need a reason to stop."

"You don't have to end up in hospital just to have a reason to stop."

Addison nodded again. "I have nothing special in my life at the moment, really."

"What about Derek?" Miss Lambert spoke carefully. "You seem to get on really well with him."

She smiled. "He's my first real friend I suppose."

"He's a great guy, I know he wouldn't purposely hurt you."

Addison nodded. "I'm just scared that he'll want what I can't give and get fed up with me."

"Derek's not that kind of guy, he isn't like who you were with before."

"What if he finds me?" She looked at Miss Lambert, a frightened look in her eyes.

Miss Lambert felt her heart break for the girl; so young and already she had been through so much. "If he does, his life wouldn't be worth living."

"No one knows about him though."

"Does Derek know about him?"

"Yeah, he saw my cuts and wanted to know."

"It's good you told someone. Great, even. How did he take it?"

"I think he wants to kill him."

"He's not the only one." Addison looked up at Miss Lambert. She smiled slightly at Addison, shrugging. "Hey, guys like that should be locked away forever."

"I just feel so violated by him."

"I know, I'd be shocked if you didn't feel that way. But as hard as it may be, you have to let go, start a new. Learn to love, without the fear of what's been done to you before. Learn to trust, not every person is like him. I know it's going to be hard, it's going to take time, but you have Derek, you have me, we'll be with you every step of the way."

She nodded with tears in her eyes. "Thank you."

Miss Lambert squeezed her shoulder, smiling softly. "You know, when you hit rock bottom, the only way you can go, is back up."

"Yeah…" Addison smiled. Miss Lambert smiled back encouragingly, sitting a moment in silence. "Don't tell my dad, please," Addison whispered.

Miss Lambert bit her lip, but nodded. "It's safe with me, but if it gets any worse, I will have to say something."

"I want to stop, I do."

"I know, but you can't do it on your own. Maybe your dad could help?"

"No," She replied quickly and shook her head. "I don't want him knowing about Steve, I don't want anyone knowing about Steve."

"You don't have to tell him about Steve, just the cutting?"

"He'll want to know why I did it though."

"Well, you don't necessarily have to tell him it was because of Steve."

She shook her head. "I just can't talk to him about it."

"Okay." Miss Lambert nodded.

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"Letting me talk to you."

"You can talk to me anytime you want."

"Thank you, it means a lot." Addison smiled.

Miss Lambert stood up. "I'll be looking out for you, to make sure you're okay. If you feel like cutting, talk to me, okay?"

"Okay, I will." Addison stood up as well.

"So, you feel like playing netball or do you want to watch?"

"Can I watch? I've never played before."


	15. Chapter 15

A/N: Okay, so updating will be a little crazy for this fic this month. My beta is doing this writing thing and cannot beta and I don't really like posting this fic without it being beta-ed by her, b/c this fic is my baby atm. I have re-read it but there may still be mistakes so I apologise if there are any.

I forgot to mention in the last chapter that this is in a way dedicated to Miss Lambert. Miss Lambert is actually a real person who I owe alot to. I wanted Addison to have someone there for her like I had Miss Lambert when I needed her, so that's where she came in. I know that Miss Lambert won't actually be reading this but I still want to say a big thank you to her for being so amazing!!!

Thank you to Emily for giving me ideas and for writing Miss Lambert and Derek in this chapter when I got stuck. So thanks hun!!!

Enjoy

* * *

Three months later and Addison sat on her bathroom floor. She had her knees up close to her chest and she stared in front of her. It couldn't be real, could it? It had to be a dream, right? It couldn't be happening to her, could it? It wasn't something that happened to her. It couldn't be real, it was not happening, it was not going to happen. She was dreaming it, she had to be!

Addison quickly stood up and reached for her blade again, wanting to cut, to rid herself of all her emotions. She placed the cool blade on her warm skin, ready to cut. Then she remembered her promise to Derek and Miss Lambert. She had promised Derek she wouldn't cut, and she had promised Miss Lambert she would talk to her if she needed to cut. Slowly she put the blade back down, leaving the bathroom quickly, walking into her bedroom and getting dressed, ready for school.

At 7:30 Derek knocked on the front door as normal and smiled when Addison opened the door. "Morning." He pecked her lips quickly. She plastered a smiled on her face and took hold of his hand as they started walking to school. "How was your night? I didn't see much of you?"

"I was tired, and didn't feel that great." She smiled at him.

"You feeling better now?" He kissed her forehead.

"Yeah…" That was a complete lie, she felt horrible.

"Good." He smiled and pulled her close. "I got a basketball match tonight, you going to stay and watch?"

"Erm, I'm not sure, I still don't feel 100%, so I might go home and take a nap. I'll see how I feel."

"Okay." They feel into a comfortable silence as they walked to school, just enjoying each other's company.

Ten minutes after they had reached school, the bell rang signalling for everyone to go to tutor, for any announcements. Addison and Derek made their way to their tutor room, where some of their tutor group and Miss Lambert already were. Miss Lambert smiled at Addison as she entered and she gave a weak smile back, Miss Lambert frowned as she watched Addison sit down quietly. She could sense there was something wrong.

Twenty minutes later, when the announcements had been given, the bell rang, signalling the start of period one. As the tutor group was leaving Miss Lambert looked out for Addison. "Addison, can I have a word please." She smiled at her.

"Sure." Addison let go of Derek's hand and walked towards Miss Lambert. They waited until the whole tutor group had left before either spoke.

"What's wrong?" Miss Lambert looked at Addison.

"What do you mean?"

"There's something wrong, I can tell."

"Oh…"

"Addison."

Tears welled up in Addison's eyes and she looked down. She knew she had to tell someone. "I wanted to cut this morning." Her voice was small.

"Why?"

"Because of what I found out…"

"What did you find out?" Miss Lambert asked carefully.

Addison just looked up at her, trying to find the words. "I'm pregnant." More tears flowed down her cheeks.

Miss Lambert rested against the desk, thoughts running through her mind. "Pregnant?" She asked carefully.

"Yeah…" Addison nodded, looking down.

"Have you told Derek?"

She shook her head. "How can I tell him?"

"Rip off the band-aid?" She suggested, "He won't leave you, Adds."

"How can you be so sure though? What if when I tell him then he freaks and leaves?"

"He didn't freak when you told him you cut, he didn't freak when you told him about Steve. Most guys would have left by that point, but Derek didn't."

"But what if this is too much?" She looked up with scared eyes.

"If it is, give him time to process things, I mean, it's a bombshell for anyone, you, me, Derek. But we're here for you."

"How am I going to tell my dad though? He'll be devastated."

"Would you have to tell him about Steve? Presuming it is Steve's?"

"I could tell him it's Derek's but I don't know if he'll believe me."

"Addison, you're going to have to tell him sometime, you can't keep this to yourself forever, he's family, and you never know, maybe he'll take it better than you think?"

Addison shook her head. "I can't, I just can't tell him about Steve, he'll want me to take it further and I never want to see him again. I just want to forget about it and get on with the rest of my life."

"How would he want you to take it further?"

"Go to the police."

"Would it not be for the best if he got locked away?"

"I don't want to see him again, and I don't want him knowing I'm pregnant."

"You won't see him again if he's in jail."

"But I'd have to see him in court."

"Maybe so, but a few moments compared to the rest of your life without seeing him?"

"What about when he gets out though? Or they don't put him in jail? He'll come looking for me then."

"Then maybe they'll take him away somewhere else, or issue a restraining order."

"That won't stop him." A few more tears rolled down her cheeks. "I just want to be free from him."

Miss Lambert nodded, feeling pain for her. "What are you going to do about the baby?"

"I don't know, but it's not right to abort it, it hasn't done anything wrong."

Miss Lambert breathed a sigh of relief, abortion had never been an issue that she supported. "Maybe give the baby up for adoption? If you can't deal with something that reminds you of what happened."

"I don't think I can carry a life around for nine months and then just give it up."

"You know, you are a lot stronger than what you think."

"What do you mean?" Addison looked up at her.

"You've been through so much, and even with this, you're thinking of keeping the baby - most girls I know wouldn't be able to even keep it."

"It's not the baby's fault." She shrugged.

"I know."

"It wouldn't be fair to get rid of it."

"I know, so are you going to keep it?"

"Yeah, I think so." She nodded.

"Okay, well if you need any help..." Miss Lambert trailed off, leaving the rest unspoken

"Thank you, I just don't know how to tell Derek really."

"Maybe write him a letter or something?"

"I should tell him in person really, he deserves that, and if he doesn't want to stay with me then, I'll understand." She didn't want him to leave her though. She wanted him to be by her side the whole time.

"I don't see why he wouldn't stay by your side, you two are really close."

"He shouldn't have to bring up another guy's child if he doesn't want to."

"If he doesn't want to, but he's a great guy, he wouldn't let you go through this alone."

Addison just nodded. "I can't believe this is happening." She whispered.

"I know, but you're not alone, you have us. You'll get through this, I promise."

"Okay." She nodded. "Thank you Miss."

"Anytime, Addison. You know where to find me."

Addison smiled. "I should get to class."

"What do you have now?"

"Maths." She sighed.

Miss Lambert winced. "Do you want a pass or something? You don't look so well."

"It's just the morning sickness." Addison shrugged. "I need to get used to it."

"Okay," Miss Lambert nodded. "Go have some fun with algebra."

"Thanks." Addison rolled her eyes but smiled. Miss Lambert grinned at her, standing. "I better go." Addison smiled and left the room. Miss Lambert stared for a moment after she'd gone, closing her eyes. She'd gone through so much for a sixteen year old, no person should ever have to go through that.

----

Addison waited for Derek after the team's basketball match that afternoon. She had to tell him, and she was nervous, she was afraid he'd leave. She took a deep breath and walked towards him as he left the changing rooms. "Hey," Derek greeted her as he saw her approach him.

"Hey." She smiled at him.

"Is everything okay?" Derek noticed that Addison seemed different.

"I need to talk to you."

"Okay, what about?" Derek sat down, patting the space next to him.

Addison sat down next to him. "There's something I need to tell you, and it'll change our relationship."

Derek looked worried, looking at her. "What happened?" He asked softly.

She took a deep breath. "I'm pregnant." Derek fell silent, a million thoughts running through his mind. "I know it's a lot to ask, and you don't have to stay with me, it's not your baby so you don't have to do this, I just had to tell you…." Addison began to ramble. Derek looked at her, not knowing what to say. "I'll just go." She stood up.

"Wait." Addison turned to face him and Derek took a deep breath. "Addison, I don't care if you're sick and dying... well actually I would, but that's not the point. I told you, I'd always be here for you and that doesn't change because you're carrying around another human."

"Really?" She felt the tears gather in her eyes.

Derek grasped her shoulders, looking into her eyes. "Really."

Tears rolled down her cheeks and she hugged him. "Thank you." She whispered.

"I've done nothing for you to be thankful for," Derek murmured, holding her close.

"You're staying, you're not leaving me."

Derek smiled, kissing the top of her head. "I have no intention to leave either." A few tears rolled down her cheeks and she buried her head into his chest. Derek held her tight against him, letting her cry.

After a few minutes she calmed down and looked up at him. "Are you okay?" She nodded and wiped away her tears. Derek smiled softly at her, running his hand up and down her arm.

Addison smiled and pulled back slightly. "We should go home."

"Yeah," Derek agreed, taking her hand and leading her out of the room.

"You really don't mind about this? I mean we're together but I'm carrying another man's baby."

"I hate that it's his, but it doesn't make me love you any less." Addison smiled at him and pecked his lips quickly. Derek grinned, loosely wrapping an arm around her as they walked through the school.

"I'm going to be a mom." She whispered.

"Yeah..." Derek mused, "You'll be a great mom."

"You think so?"

"Yeah, I know so." Addison smiled and placed a hand on her stomach. Derek smiled, pulling her closer.

"I actually have a life growing inside of me." She smiled and spread her fingers.

Derek nodded, lacing his fingers with hers. "It's amazing, isn't it?"

"It is." She looked up at him.

"Well, no matter what, I'll be by your side every step of the way."

"Thank you." She smiled and pecked his cheek. "It means a lot to me." Derek just grinned, kissing the top of her head. "I don't want to tell my dad just yet."

"That's okay, take your time."

"I don't know how he'll react though."

"Well, at the end of the day you're still his daughter, he'll still love you no matter what." Addison shrugged, not completely sure. "He's your father."

"I know, but my parents aren't like normal parents."

"I guess. But your dad seems nicer than your mom."

"I don't want to tell them it's Steve's baby."

"Do they not know about what he did?"

She shook her head. "Only you and Miss Lambert know."

"Ah okay. Are you not going to tell them then?"

"No, I don't want to ever tell them." Derek nodded, understanding why she wouldn't want to tell them. "I need to make an appointment with the doctor."

"Do you want me to come with you?"

"Yeah." She smiled at him.

"Okay," Derek smiled.

"Thank you."

"Anytime." Addison leaned into his touch as they made their way home.


	16. Chapter 16

A/N: Okay so I'm sorry I haven't updated in a while but I did say seeing as my beta can't beta this month I didn't want to update too many chaps unbeta-ed. And there's the fact that I haven't been very well and am stillnot 100% now. I'm also feeling a little like people aren't really reading this. Pease just review and give me your thoughts even if it's only a few words but it means so much to me.

Enjoy!!

* * *

Addison nervously sat in the waiting room and looked around her. Derek wrapped an arm around her and placed a kiss on her hair. "It'll be okay, don't worry." She just nodded and gave a small smile, hoping he was right. He linked their fingers together and kissed her on the lips. "It'll be fine." Addison took a deep breath and looked around as a door opened and a doctor stepped out, calling a name.

"Addison Montgomery." Addison stood up with Derek and they walked towards the doctor, holding hands. "Come this way." The doctor smiled at them and led them to an exam. "So you're pregnant?" The doctor shut the door behind them.

"Yes, I found out this morning." Addison nodded.

"Okay, hop up onto the exam table for me please. I'm Dr. Suylen." She smiled at them. "Are you her boyfriend?" She looked at Derek.

"Yes, I am."

"Okay then, let's get started." The doctor sat on a stool next to Addison who was sat on the table. "We'll take some blood to run a few tests then we'll do a scan, that sound okay?"

"Yes." Addison nodded.

"Okay, lie back for me please." Addison led back and watched as the doctor prepared a needle. "Why don't you look at your boyfriend while I take this blood?" The doctor smiled and inserted the needle into Addison's arm. Derek smiled at her reassuringly and Addison smiled back. "Okay that's done, I'll just send these off to be tested a minute." The doctor left the room for a few minutes.

"Are you going to tell her about Steve?" Derek looked at her.

"No, she doesn't need to know, no one does."

Derek sighed. "Okay." He nodded.

The doctor returned and smiled at them. "Do you want to take a seat next to Addison so you can see the screen as well?" She looked at Derek who nodded and sat down, smiling at Addison. "Can you roll your top up for me please." Derek was surprised when he saw Addison's stomach was slightly rounded already. "This may be cold." She squirted cold gel onto Addison's stomach before sitting on a stool and picked up the wand, running it over Addison's stomach.

Addison took a deep breath and took hold of Derek's hand, as they waited for the doctor to find the baby.

"Just there is your baby." The doctor turned the screen and pointed. Addison felt tears well up in her eyes at the sight. Derek squeezed her hand and kissed it.

"That's my baby?"

"That is your baby, congratulations you two." The doctor smiled at them. Tears rolled down Addison's cheeks and Derek placed a gentle kiss on her hair, trying to keep his own tears at bay, he had never seen anything more beautiful, apart from Addison.

"You're about four months along…"

"Four?!" Addison turned to look at the doctor.

"Yes, and you're due January 4th." Addison nodded and turned back to the screen. Derek smiled, suddenly looking forward to the New Year. Addison turned to look at him and smiled. Derek grinned widely at her, holding her hand.

"I'm going to be a mommy."

"You suit that," Derek mused, not taking his eyes off her.

"Really?" More tears rolled down her cheeks. Derek nodded, squeezing her hand lightly. "I'm having a baby." Addison couldn't believe it was real.

"Yeah... a baby," Derek found it so surreal.

"It doesn't feel real."

"Well, it wouldn't feel real to me if I had a human being growing inside me." Addison just laughed at him and Derek grinned sheepishly, shrugging his shoulders.

"Do you have any questions?" The doctor smiled at them. Derek shook his head, looking at Addison.

"Not that I can think of." Addison shook her head. "Wait, can I have a photo of the scan?"

"Of course, I'll print off two, once for each of you." The doctor smiled and printed off two. Derek grinned, staring at the nugget sized human inside her body. "Thank you." Addison smiled.

"No problem, book an appointment for four weeks time and I'll see you then." They smiled and left the room. Derek smiled at Addison, holding her hand as they walked out.

"I can't believe I have this life growing inside of me."

"I know, it's unbelievable. I have a whole new respect for women now." Addison raised her eyebrows at him. "What?" Derek shrugged. She shook her head amused and leaned into him. Derek grinned, wrapping an arm around her, drawing her closer to him.

"I just want to start planning a nursery now." She beamed.

"Do you have any ideas?"

"Not really, but I want it to be something nice. It'll have to be a mutual colour seeing as we don't know the sex."

"Hmm, would you want to know the sex?"

"I don't know, I think it would be more special not knowing."

Derek smiled, "Yeah, like a present or something."

"Yeah." Addison gently rubbed her stomach. Derek glanced at her, smiling softly. She would really make a great mom. "Will you help me decorate the nursery?"

"Of course," Derek grinned widely.

"Thank you." She pecked his lips.

"You're welcome," Derek smiled softly, lacing her fingers with his. Addison just leaned into his touch. Derek dropped a kiss on her head as he walked her home.

Addison turned to face him when they reached her door and smiled. "So..." Derek smiled at her, stuffing his hands in his pockets.

"Do you want to come in?"

"Sure," Derek inwardly yelled with joy. Addison smiled at him and opened the front door. Derek waited until she stepped in the house first.

"Do you want something to drink?" Addison stood in the hallway.

Derek shook his head. "I'm alright, thanks."

"Anything to eat?"

Derek shook his head again, "I'm not hungry," He grinned sheepishly.

"I can make something, I don't mind, I'm kind of hungry myself."

"I'm alright, honestly."

"Okay, I might order pizza though."

"Pizza sounds good."

"Do you want one?" Addison picked up the phone.

"I can share yours."

"I'll order a large one then." She smiled and rang the pizza place. Derek smiled, and wandered into her living room. A few minutes later Addison joined him on the couch.

"When's the pizza due?"

"Fifteen minutes." She smiled at him.

"Okay," Derek smiled, leaning back into the couch.

"So…what do you want to do until then?"

"Uh, I don't know, it's your house," Derek smiled, leaning towards her.

"Technically it's my dad's house." She turned towards him.

"Well, you're also living here," He almost whispered, leaning closer, his hand resting on her hip.

"Hmm, I am." She looked back at him, dropping her gaze quickly to his lips. Derek smiled, leaning in closer so that their lips were barely touching. Addison could feel his breath tickling her cheeks and she inched her lips closer to him. Derek captured her lips with his, shifting so that he was closer to her. She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him back. He ran his tongue along her bottom lip, sucking slightly. He moved his hand so that it was holding her hip, his thumb running in circles.

Addison pulled him closer and ran her hands through his hair. Derek grinned into the kiss, moving his hands further up her body. A small moan passed her lips. His hands passed up her body, tracing the outline until he cupped her cheek. She let her tongue duel against his and ran her hands over his back. He moaned slightly into the kiss, shifting closer to her. Once the need for air became too much they pulled apart. Derek's hands remained cupping her face as he looked into her eyes. Addison just looked back at him, breathing heavily. He didn't say anything, simply tracing her jaw line with his thumb.

Then the doorbell rang interrupting the moment. "That'll be the pizza." Derek grinned sheepishly, dropping his hand. Addison smiled and stood up, walking to the front door. Derek leant back into the couch, smiling to himself, waiting for the pizza - and Addison for that matter. A few minutes later Addison walked back into the room with the pizza. Derek grinned upon seeing the pizza, sitting up excitedly. She placed it on the table and opened it, taking a slice. Derek followed suit, looking at Addison as she ate.

She closed her eyes and enjoyed the taste. Derek finished his slice, reaching for another one, noting how cute Addison looked when she ate. She watched as he picked up another slice and finished her own. Derek finished his slice, sitting back on the couch. "Not eating any more?" Addison commented.

"I told you I wasn't hungry," Derek grinned. She rolled her eyes and took another slice while Derek watched her, smiling to himself.

A while later and there was only two slices left of the pizza. "You have them." Addison pushed the box towards Derek.

"I'll have some later, I'm really not hungry."

"Okay." Addison just shut the box and sat back with her hands on her stomach.

Derek's eyes followed her hands, smiling at the sight. "Your stomach is starting to show," He commented.

"Really?"

"Yeah, it looks great." Addison smiled and rubbed her stomach. "Can you feel anything yet?"

"No, just sick in the mornings."

"How's that going?"

"Not that good." She sighed and closed her eyes.

Derek furrowed his brow, hating seeing her like this. "Is there anything I can do to help?" Addison just shook her head and continued to rub her stomach. "Do you have any cravings yet?" Derek grinned.

"Erm." She thought about it for a while. "Well I have been wanting to eat strawberries dipped in marmite lately, and I hate marmite." She screwed her nose up.

Derek tried to hold back a laugh. "Seriously?" He attempted to keep a straight face. "I love marmite."

"Well I don't, but I want strawberries dipped in it." She opened her eyes and looked at him. "That's weird."

"Yeah, it is, but maybe it'll be surprisingly nice?"

"Hmm." Derek laughed, the image of Addison eating strawberries with marmite still in his mind. "Hey." She smacked his arm. "Don't laugh at me."

Derek smirked, shaking his head, "I'm not."

Addison pouted. "You are."

"Not."

"Yes."

"You dare contradict me woman?" He grinned, grabbing a pillow.

"Oh I dare." Derek raised an eyebrow, laughing to himself. "What are you going to do about that huh?" She raised an eyebrow at him.

"Hmm, let me think..." Derek pretended to scratch his chin, bringing the pillow down on Addison.

"NO!" She screamed and giggled.

"Scared of a pillow?" Derek laughed, gently whacking her shoulders.

"Derek!" She grabbed a cushion for herself and hit him with it.

"Ha," Derek smirked, holding his cushion in front of him like a shield.

"Cheater!"

"Ah, there's cheating, then there's tactics," Derek grinned, hitting Addison on the head with his cushion.

"Hey!" She smacked him in the stomach with her cushion.

"That was supposed to hurt?" Derek raised his eyebrows, pushing Addison with his pillow so that she lay on the floor, him hovering above her.

"Now that's cheating." She looked up at him.

Derek smirked, lowering. "And do I see you complaining?"

"Depends."

"On what?"

"What you do now."

"Oh really?" Derek smiled, leaning down further to gently capture her lips. Her only response was to kiss him back, wrapping her arms around his neck. He gently pressed against her stomach, his hands either side of her holding him up. She let her tongue slip into his mouth, massaging his. Derek moaned slightly against her lips, his hand moving to rest on her hip. Addison shifted slightly beneath him making him moan again. Derek felt his jeans getting tight, and tighter. He kissed her more passionately, hoping she wouldn't notice his apparent erection. She shifted again as she felt the bulge in his pants grow. He moaned against her lips, his jeans getting more uncomfortable by the moment.

"Maybe we shouldn't." She mumbled.

"Shouldn't what?" Derek started to feel dizzy, tangling his hands in her hair. Just then the door opened and in walked Peter. Derek pulled away slightly, a confused look on his face. "Did someone walk in?"

"My dad." Addison looked up at him.

"Crap," Derek scrambled off Addison, grabbing a cushion to hide his erection under. Addison quickly sat back up on the couch but Peter had already seen.

Peter looked at the two, obvious to him as to what they had been doing. "What the hell do you think you are doing?"

"Nothing." Addison quickly replied.

"It doesn't look like nothing."

"It wasn't anything." She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.

"So me walking in with Derek on top of you is nothing?" His voice was rising.

"We weren't going to do anything."

"Once you start it's pretty hard to stop," Peter retorted.

"We weren't going to go that far."

Peter's eyes travelled over the two, noticing a bulge in Derek's pants. He raised his eyebrow, "Oh no? So you're telling me you weren't going to go that far when Derek over here has a very obvious attraction to you?"

"I wouldn't let it get that far!"

"Well like I said, it's pretty hard to stop! I don't want you ending up pregnant at sixteen!"

Addison felt her heart drop at that. "I don't want to go that far yet." She replied quietly.

"You'd better not, you're far too young for that." She just looked down, knowing she couldn't tell him about the pregnancy now. Peter glanced at Derek, "You'd better get rid of that," He glanced at his crotch area, before leaving the room. Addison buried her face in her hands. Derek scooted closer, his hand on her back.

"We shouldn't do that again."

"Hmm. Maybe not here," Derek smirked.

"So where are we meant to make out then?" She turned and looked at him. "And it won't solve that problem." She pointed to the bulge in his jeans.

Derek shrugged, "Anywhere where your dad won't walk in." Derek looked down at the bulge, a blush creeping up his cheeks. "Well sorry to disappoint, but that will still happen."

"I don't want sex Derek." Addison sighed and sat back.

"I know, but it won't make this go away."

"But it makes it feel like you want more."

"So?" Derek shrugged. "I'm not going to pressure you into having sex just because my penis sticks up." Addison giggled slightly at that. Derek smiled, glancing at his bulge, which still happened to be there.

"It's kind of weird you know."

"How is it weird?"

"It's just weird, your penis 'sticks up' as you put it." She looked at the bulge as well.

"Well, it's part of our nature," Derek smirked.

"Isn't it uncomfortable?"

"Yeah," Derek admitted, "It aches like hell."

She giggled. "How do you get rid of it then?"

"Uhm, well there's sex, obviously, but uh... I guess thinking of something to turn me off or just masturbating I guess."

"Oh…okay." Derek nodded, feeling uncomfortable. "You should erm…probably get rid of that right?"

"Yeah," Derek smiled slightly, a small blush appearing on his cheeks.

"You can erm…go do whatever it is you need to do…" Derek nodded, standing up to go to the bathroom. "I'll wait here." She smiled at him, looking away from his bulge.

"Okay," Derek walked out the room. Addison just sat and hugged her knees.

---

Derek walked back in the room, a smile on his face. "Better for you?" Addison smirked.

"Yeah," Derek grinned. "Much."

"Good." She giggled.

"So..." Addison shrugged and looked at him. "I don't think we should carry on where we left off." He smirked.

"No, my dad wasn't too happy about that."

"And I don't think my penis would be able to take it." Addison just nodded and Derek smiled awkwardly.

"Maybe you should go."

"Uh, sure, okay," Derek smiled slightly, turning to leave.

"Sorry it's just, to let my dad cool down." Addison stood up from the couch.

"So when do I see you again?"

"School, tomorrow." She smiled.

"Oh yeah," Derek looked slightly embarrassed.

"Have you got your scan photo?" She asked quietly.

"Yeah, why?"

"Just checking, you can keep it you know." She smiled.

"Well, I wasn't intending to throw it out anytime soon." Addison rolled her eyes but quickly pecked his lips. Derek grinned, pulling her in for a kiss. She giggled slightly and kissed him back. Derek grinned, pulling back. "We wouldn't want your dad to walk in now do we?"

"No, we wouldn't."

"So I'd better go."

"Yeah, I'll see you in the morning?"

"Yeah, see you then." She smiled and waved at him as he left.


	17. Chapter 17

A/N: So here is the next chapter for you and I should be updating every Sunday again now, I hope. So read and review please.

Enjoy!!

* * *

Addison got into school earlier the next day and went and found Miss Lambert. "Erm, Miss, there's something I want to show you."

Miss Lambert turned, smiling as she saw Addison. "What do you want to show me?"

"This." Addison handed her the scan photo.

Her smile widened as she scanned the photo. "Wow, Addison! It's like a little pea!"

"Yeah." Addison smiled proudly.

"This is great Addison," Miss Lambert smiled warmly.

"I'm due 4th January."

"That's cool, a New Year baby!"

"Yeah." She smiled. "But I can't tell my dad."

"Why not?"

"Because he told me he doesn't want me pregnant at sixteen."

"When did he say that?" Addison blushed. "Addison..?" Miss Lambert probed, sensing a story behind his words.

"He erm, kind of caught me and Derek, erm, making out, with Derek on top of me." She looked down her cheeks nearly the same colour as her hair.

Miss Lambert tried to look stern, but failed as a small giggle escaped from her lips. "Seriously? Your dad walked in on you with Derek on top of you?" Addison nodded biting her lip, seeing the funny side. "Well, I guess my advice to you would be to make out in a place where no one is likely to walk in."

"Yeah…it was kind of on the living room floor…"

A laugh escaped her lips. "The living room? Of all places in your house!"

"He wasn't home at first, and we'd eaten pizza before, and then Derek started hitting me with a cushion so I hit it him back and then…" She shrugged.

"Ahh," Miss Lambert grinned. "To be young and in love..."

Addison smiled. "But I can't tell my dad about the baby."

"Give it time."

"He had a go at me yesterday because he thought me and Derek were going to…he told me he doesn't want me pregnant at sixteen."

"It's not like you wanted to get pregnant either," Miss Lambert pointed out.

"I know." She sighed and rubbed her stomach absent mindedly.

"So what are you going to do?"

"Keep the baby, I'm not going to get rid of it, no matter what anyone says."

"I meant about your dad, you can't hide it forever."

"I can try for however long I can."

"The longer you wait, the worse he's going to take it."

Addison sighed. "No matter what he's going to be mad though, he'll probably blame Derek."

"Then explain it has nothing to do with Derek."

"I don't want him to know about Steve though."

"Why not?"

"Because, it makes me feel ashamed." She closed her eyes.

"It wasn't your fault."

"I didn't stop it though."

"From what you told me, it didn't seem like you could."

"I just can't." Addison looked at Miss Lambert sadly. Miss Lambert nodded, aching for the girl. "I just wanted to show you the scan." Addison changed the subject.

Miss Lambert smiled, nodding her head. "I'm sorry." Addison just nodded her head and the bell rang. Miss Lambert stood straighter, smiling sadly at her. Addison smiled back and sat down, Derek joining her after.

"Hey, you okay?"

"Yeah, you?" She smiled.

"Yeah, I'm good."

"Good." Derek smiled, looking at the board. "I showed Miss the scan."

"What did she think?" Derek grinned.

"That it looks like a little pea." She smiled.

"She speaks the truth."

"You think this baby looks like a pea?" Addison raised her eyebrows.

"Yes." Derek smirked, keeping his eyes trained on the board.

"Hey." She smacked his arm playfully.

"What? What do you think it looks like then?"

She shrugged. "I don't know."

"That's because it looks like a pea."

"My baby does not look like a pea." She pouted.

"Yes, it does." Addison just pouted more at him. Derek smirked, starting to write.

----

Addison led on her bed, with Derek on top of her, kissing her passionately. His hand moved to her hip, lifting her shirt slightly. She tensed slightly from his actions and shifted her legs slightly underneath him. Derek pulled away slightly, lips barely touching. She looked up at him. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, why?" She stroked his cheek.

"You tensed."

"You lifted my shirt."

Derek flushed slightly, pulling her top so it covered her stomach. He placed his hands on her hips, smiling slightly. "Better?"

"Thanks." She kissed him back. Derek grinned against her lips, kissing her gently. Addison wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer. He moaned slightly, pressing against her. Once again she could feel his erection against her, and just massaged his tongue with hers. Derek shifted, his hand snaking around her neck. Addison let out a small moan. Derek ran a hand through her hair, his tongue duelling with hers. Slowly she shifted beneath him again and Derek was so engrossed in kissing her, he didn't notice the door open then slam shut. Addison never heard the noise either, and continued to let her tongue duel against his, pulling him closer.

"What the hell is going on here?!" Peter raised his voice, his face flushed with anger. Addison pulled back and gasped as she looked at her father. "Well? Haven't you learnt your lesson from last time?"

"We weren't doing anything!"

Peter snorted, "Yeah, right, that's what it looked like. He was on top of you for god's sake Addison!"

"We were kissing! That's all!" Why couldn't he seem to understand she didn't want sex?!

"Kissing? Looked like full blown making out to me!"

"We weren't going to have sex though!"

"How am I supposed to know that? It's hard to just stop when it goes further!"

"I don't want sex!" She yelled. "I don't want to have sex for a few more years!"

Peter looked shocked. "You've had sex before?!"

"No!" She lied.

Peter fixed his gaze on Derek. "You better not have."

"We haven't!" It was the truth.

"And how long do you think that will last?"

"Until we're older!"

"Well that's going to be hard," Peter snorted, crossing his arms.

"Why?" Addison looked at him.

Peter rolled his eyes. "Guys are only after one thing Addison!"

"Not every guy is the same! Derek is different! He actually cares about me and my feelings!"

"All teenage guys are trousers full of testosterone!"

"Not all of them, some actually care more about than just getting laid."

"How would you know?"

"Because Derek is different."

"And who do you have Derek to compare to, huh?" Addison kept her mouth shut, not wanting to tell her dad about Steve. "Well?" Peter pressed.

"Just some guy." Addison said and looked down.

"Some guy? What, you've had another guy before?" She just played with her bed sheets. "Addison?!"

"Just some guy when I lived with mom." She shrugged.

Peter rolled his eyes. "Of course, your mom would let you do anything. So what was about this guy that now you're comparing Derek to him, huh?" Addison just looked away, at Derek. Derek took hold of her hand, looking at her before briefly glancing at Peter. She didn't want her dad to know about Peter, she didn't want him to know any of it. "Addison, do I have to tell you again to be careful?"

"I'm not having sex dad."

"And what if it goes too far?"

"It won't."

"You don't know that Addison! What if it does go too far, and you end up pregnant at sixteen? What happens then?!" Peter's voice rose, almost yelling.

Tears spilled down her cheeks. "Then I'll be a teenage mom."

"And that doesn't matter to you? You have your whole future, and one mistake, one slip, one step too far and you can kiss those dreams goodbye!"

"But I've already lost it!" She screamed, more tears flowing.

"Lost what?!" Peter yelled back, the realisation suddenly dawning on him.

"I'm pregnant." She sobbed. Fury washed over Peter's face, yet his eyes displayed hurt, shame, agony that his little girl was carrying another human being at her young age. Addison just buried her head into Derek's shoulder and sobbed. Peter didn't know what to do or say. He stood there, dumbfounded but left the room, words suddenly dying in his throat. "He hates me, he hates me." Her body shook from the sobs.

"He doesn't, he just doesn't know how to take it," Derek held her close, kissing the top of her head.

She shook her head. "He hates me."

"He'll come round."

"What if he doesn't?" She looked up at him with tear streaked cheeks.

"He will, he's your father."

"He might not."

"It's bound to be a shock, I'm sure he'll be alright after a while." Addison just looked at him sadly. Derek pressed his lips against her forehead, a hand running through her hair.

"I'm not giving this baby up." She whispered.

"No one is asking you to." Addison just nodded. "This baby is all yours, okay?" She placed a hand on her stomach and could start to feel the roundness of it. Derek smiled, placing his hand on hers. She smiled up at him, lacing their fingers together. He pressed his lips against her hair, lingering for a moment.

"What am I going to do about my dad?"

"Leave it be for a while, let him get used to it."

She nodded. "Will you stay with me for a while?"

"Sure, as long as you want."

"Thank you."

"Anything for you," Derek whispered. Addison smiled and pecked his lips. Derek continued to stroke her hair, not saying anything. She just leaned into his touch, thinking. He just held her close, wanting to be near her, and to provide safety, a place of comfort for her in his arms.

"Have you ever had a girlfriend Derek?" She asked softly.

"No, not really. I guess you could say I was the type of guy who waited for a serious relationship."

"But you're going out with me."

"Well, then I guess my waiting paid off," He smiled softly and she smiled widely at him. Derek grinned, moving back so he leant against her headrest, and pulled Addison closer to him. She smiled and moved closer, letting her head rest on his chest. Absentmindedly, he ran his hand through her hair, twirling strands around his fingers.

"Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure, go ahead."

She looked up at him. "Will you be a father to my baby?" Addison's voice was soft.

A few tears sprang to his eyes as he held Addison tight. "Of course I will," He whispered.

"Thank you." She smiled at him.

"Do you have any names in mind?"

"I do like the name Jessica, what do you think?"

"I think that's a beautiful name."

Addison smiled. "Are there any names you like?"

"I haven't really thought about names."

"Will you help me choose names though?"

"Sure."

"Okay." She smiled.

Derek smiled back. "Well, we have nine months to figure out a name."

"Five months actually." She looked up at him.

"Oh yeah," Derek grinned sheepishly.

Addison laughed at him. "In five months time we'll have a baby to care for."

"That's so surreal... in a matter of months, we're going to be parents."

"It's scary." She whispered.

Derek nodded. "We'll manage."

"What do you think your mom will say?"

"She'll support us, I know."

"Can I tell people that it's your baby?" Derek nodded. "Okay." Addison smiled widely while Derek grinned, rubbing her arm. "I should talk to my dad." Her voice was quiet.

"Yeah. Maybe you could tell him about Steve? Maybe he wouldn't be so accusatory then," Derek suggested.

"I don't want to tell him about Steve though, I don't want anyone else knowing."

"Okay."

"Should I talk to him now do you think?"

"Yeah. Do you want me to come with you?"

"Yeah." She smiled and got off her bed, waiting for Derek. Derek followed, standing next to her. She slipped her hand into his as they walked down the stairs and into the living room. Derek squeezed her hand lightly as they entered. "Dad?" Addison questioned as they saw him sat on the couch. Peter turned, reluctantly looking at Addison. "I didn't want to get pregnant." Her voice was quiet.

"Then why did you?" She just looked down at the floor. "Addison? If you didn't want to get pregnant, you shouldn't have had sex, simple as."

"I know." But it wasn't like she had much choice in the matter.

Peter sighed. "What are you going to do with it?"

"I'm keeping my baby."

"And how are you going to manage bringing it up?"

"Me and Derek will bring this baby up."

"Two sixteen year olds bringing up a baby?"

"Yes, I am not giving this baby up." Addison looked at her father.

"Okay then, whatever you decide," Peter sighed, he knew arguing with his daughter would be pointless.

Addison nodded. "Are…are you, are you mad with me?"

"What do you expect Addison? You're my daughter, sixteen years old, and you're pregnant. I'm just, disappointed in you, I thought you knew better."

"I never wanted it to happen, I swear, I didn't plan it, I didn't want it." She added quietly.

"Then why have unprotected sex?" Addison didn't want him to know about Steve, but she had no idea what to say. "Well? If you didn't want this to happen, why didn't you use any protection?" Peter pressed on.

"I didn't have a choice." Her voice was quiet.

"What do you mean?" His voice was low, almost not wanting to hear an answer. So many scenarios were running through his head. Addison just turned to Derek's arms and squeezed her eyes shut. Peter stood, walking towards them. "Addison, what happened when you were living with your mom?" His voice didn't sound angry, but more worried, concerned. She shook her head and buried it into Derek's shoulder. "Right, I'm calling your mom. If you won't tell me what's been going on, maybe she will."

"She doesn't know."

Peter sighed, closing his eyes. "Then you tell me." Addison looked up at her father with tears in her eyes. "Addi?" His voice was soft.

She looked down at the floor and moved closer to Derek. "He made me do things." She whispered. Peter didn't need to know any more, he moved closer to the pair and awkwardly put his hand on Addison's shoulder. She flinched away from him and moved closer to Derek's side.

"Addison," He whispered, dropping his hand, not knowing what to do or say.

"I don't want to talk about it."

"I didn't ask you to."

"I never want to talk about it again, I just want to forget it. I want to have this baby and be happy."

"How can you have a baby that will remind you every day of it?"

"This baby did nothing wrong! What happened has nothing to do with this baby."

"But it will be a reminder of what happened!"

"This will also be a reminder of what happened!" She pulled up her sleeves showing her cuts.

Peter's eyes widened, taking a step back. "Not you too," He murmured under his breath, memories of his own self harming days still fresh in his memory. Addison just looked at him with tears in her eyes. He didn't know what to say, without having him sound like a hypocrite.

"It was the only way to get through." Peter nodded, knowing all too well. "And no one cared."

He shut his eyes, the guilt overwhelming. "You could of called me," His voice was hoarse.

"Why? You never bothered to call me, you never bothered to see me, why should I have called?"

"I tried to call, you're mother never put me through to you." Addison looked at him, not sure if he was telling the truth. "Believe me Addison, I tried. More than once."

"Why wouldn't mom put you through then?"

"You're asking the wrong person here, Adds." She nodded and placed her hands on her small bump. "Is there anything I can do to help, at all?" Peter motioned to her bump.

"Just support us."

"Okay," Peter nodded. She smiled slightly at him and Peter smiled back, sitting down.

"I'm due January 4th."

"A new year baby," Peter noted, grinning slightly.

"Yeah." Addison smiled as well.

Peter looked at Derek. "So is he going to help you?"

"Yes." She smiled at Derek. "He says he'll be a father to my baby."

Peter grinned at the two. "That's great."

"It is." Addison smiled widely.


	18. Chapter 18

A/N: Okay, I am really sorry that I haven't updated this fic in a/b, two weeks. But seeing as I am now on xmas hols, I plan to update more frequently, maybe every other day? How dows that sound to people? The story doesn't end as quick then. I can't remember if this chapter was beta-ed or not so if there are mistakes, I apologize.

Enjoy!

* * *

"Uh mom?" Derek dubiously entered the lounge, where his mom was watching a programme on the television, "Can I talk to you about something?"

"Sure." Kathryn turned and smiled at her son.

Derek shut the door behind him and sat opposite Kathryn. "Addison's pregnant," He started, taking a deep breath. "The baby isn't mine, but I've agreed to be a father to it."

Kathryn just looked at him shocked. "She's pregnant? And you're going to be a father to it even thought you're not the father?" She questioned.

Derek nodded. "Yes."

"Wow…"

"I said I'd be there for her, no matter what."

Kathryn nodded. "Have you slept with her?"

"No, no we're taking it slow."

"Okay, how far along is she?"

"Four months."

"When's she due?"

"January fourth."

"So it'll be a New Year baby then." Kathryn smiled.

Derek looked amused. "Everyone says that."

"That's because it's true." She smiled. "Will you want a nursery here as well?"

"I don't know, we haven't really made plans for the nursery yet."

"You better start soon, otherwise the baby will be here before you know it."

"I know."

"Are you going to find out the sex?"

"No, we're going to wait until it's born."

Kathryn smiled. "We did that with you. Actually I still have baby stuff here if Addison wants it."

A grin lit up his face. "That would be great, thanks!"

"At least it'll be going to good use."

"Yeah." A thought suddenly crossed Derek's mind, and he looked up to his mom, a shy smile on his face. "Hey, if I'm going to be this child's father, you'll be it's grandmother."

"I will be." She smiled widely. "My first grandchild."

Derek chuckled to himself, "Yeah. I bet you didn't expect one to come so soon, huh?"

"No I didn't, I would rather wait a few more years."

"Well, you have a couple of months to get used to the idea."

"I do." Kathryn smiled. "Is she showing yet?"

"A little bit."

"I bet she's glowing."

"Yeah, she is." Derek smiled.

"Bring her over for dinner tomorrow."

"Okay," Derek grinned widely, looking forward to the next night.

Kathryn smiled as well. "When are you going to tell your sisters?"

"I don't know yet, soon I guess."

"Okay, you and Addison could tell them tomorrow night."

"Yeah, will do."

Kathryn smiled and stood up. "Better get dinner ready then."

"Need any help?" Derek offered, standing.

"Sure, I always welcome help, and you'll need the practice." Derek pursed his lips, trying not to smile as he shook his head with amusement. "Oh I'm sure you'll be cooking for Addison and the baby in no time."

"Yeah, I guess. Addison sure as hell can't cook."

"Bring her over and I'll show her how to." Kathryn smiled, none of her daughters wanted to learn how to cook.

"I'm sure she'd like that, but make sure your insurance covers the whole house," Derek smirked.

"Never mock a woman and her cooking Der."

"Well it's not technically cooking... more like an inedible mess. Did I tell you she burnt microwave popcorn?"

"Give her a break, she's pregnant."

"She couldn't cook before she was pregnant."

"I'll teach her how to then." Kathryn opened the cupboards.

"Okay then." Kathryn smiled at him as they began to prepare dinner. Derek opened the fridge, bringing out some apple juice for him to drink, watching his mom.

"So it's serious between you two then?"

"Yeah, it is."

"Good." She smiled. "I'm very proud of you for what you're doing." He smiled, a blush creeping up his neck. "You don't have to be embarrassed about it."

"I'm not."

"Good." She smiled. Derek smiled back, downing the apple juice. "So we've got two new members to the family."

"Who?"

"Addison and the baby." Kathryn rolled her eyes.

"Oh yeah," Derek grinned sheepishly, cursing himself for forgetting.

She smiled at him. "You won't be able to forget them soon."

"I'll never forget them."

"I know, hand me that pan please." Derek handed her the pan. "Have you got any names picked out yet?"

"Addison likes Jessica."

"That's a nice name, what names do you like?"

"I don't know yet."

"What about if it's a boy?"

"We haven't got that far yet," Derek grinned sheepishly.

"You haven't gotten very have you?" Kathryn smirked.

"Nope."

"Well you do have five months to sort it all out."

"Yeah, plenty of time."

"It'll go fast." Kathryn warned. "Before you know it, you'll have a little baby to care for."

"I know, but then, isn't it fast as they grow up?"

"Yes." She gave a sad smile. "It still seems like yesterday you were born."

Derek rolled his eyes. "So you're telling me that the day after the baby is born, he'll suddenly be sixteen?"

"No, but the time will go fast, and before you know it, the baby will be all grown up."

"No more diapers," Derek joked.

"No." She laughed. "No more diapers and night feeds, although the crying through the nights won't stop."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"No matter what age, the child will wake up during the night wanting you or Addison, because of a nightmare, or just because they're upset."

Derek smiled lightly. "I better not have done that."

"You wouldn't have." She smiled.

"Good."

"You really want this baby with Addison don't you?" Kathryn looked at him.

"Yeah, I really do."

She smiled widely. "Good." He smiled, leaning against the counter. Ten minutes later and dinner was ready. Derek carried the plates to the table here all four girls were already sat down. Derek joined them, sitting in his usual seat next to Nancy. Kathryn smiled at all of her kids as she sat down. Derek waited until his mom was sat down, before serving out the food to his sisters. Chatter was started between the siblings. Derek served his mum before heaping piles of food onto his plate. "Not taking too much then are we Der?" Kathryn raised her eyebrows.

"I'm eating," Derek muffled between bites. Kathryn shook her head amused before she began eating as well. Derek shovelled forkfuls into his mouth, ignoring the conversations beside him.

"Derek slow down."

"Why?"

"You'll end up with indigestion."

"So? It'll pass."

"Slow down." Kathryn warned.

"Fine," Derek ate at the same speed, but with less food on his fork. Kathryn sighed and shook her head at her son. Derek smirked as he ate, noticing his mom's expression.

"Mom can we watch a film tonight?" Kathleen smiled at their mom.

Derek glanced over. "Please, no chick flicks."

"P.S I Love You pleaseeeeeeeeeeee." Derek groaned, hitting the table with his head.

Kathryn smirked. "Sure girls."

"Mom!"

"Yes?" Kathryn smiled sweetly at him.

Derek narrowed his eyes, glaring at his mom. "You know I don't do chick flicks."

"I'm sure you can deal with it for one night."

Derek rolled his eyes. "One night? I've had to deal with chick flicks my whole life."

"And they've had to deal with your horror films."

"Please, they barely watch them. They just hid behind the cushions."

"Well then you can hide behind a cushion." Derek rolled his eyes again, picking up his fork. Kathryn just smiled and finished eating as well. Derek finished his food and sat back in his chair. "Derek, your turn to clean up."

"Why my turn?"

"Because it is, or you can go and put the DVD in ready and start watching." Derek grumbled, picking up everyone's plates. Kathryn smirked and the girls walked into the lounge.

"Unbelievable," Derek muttered, taking the plates into the kitchen. The girls all settled themselves ready to watch the film. Derek washed the plates and set them on the draining board before joining his family. Kathryn smiled at him as he sat down. He watched the movie, wishing he could be with Addison. The four girls were really interested in the film and by half way through no one was paying any attention to him, meaning he could sneak out and phone Addison. Slowly he got up from the chair and walked into the hallway, pulling out his phone and dialling Addison's number.

"_Hello?"_

"Hey Addi." He smiled even though she couldn't see him.

"_Hey Der."_

"How are you feeling?" He sat down on the stairs.

"_I'm okay thanks, you?"_

"Yeah, I'm good, I was just made to watch PS. I Love You though."

"_I love that film!"_

Derek chuckled. "I knew you were going to say that."

"_But the book is awesome though, I love Cecilia Ahern."_

"Erm who?"

"_Cecilia Ahern, she's a author, her books are just amazing."_

"Oh, okay then. I'll erm try and read her books some time." He could hear Addison laugh on the other end. "What?"

"_You read?"_

"Yes…well…kind of…"

"_You don't have to read her books, just know she's awesome."_

"Okay then, oh by the way, mom had invited you round for dinner tomorrow night, I told her about the baby."

"_What did she say?"_

"She seems happy about it, she can't wait to have a grandchild, but she knows it's not my baby, but she's fine with it, but we should tell my sisters it's my baby, to stop confusion, is that okay?"

"_Yeah, that's fine…my dad wants to tell my mom."_

"And you don't want to?"

"_I'm not sure, I don't know how she'll react, she's coming over tomorrow, will you be here when I tell her?"_

"Of course, if that's what you want?"

"_It is."_

"Derek?! Where are you?!" Was heard from the living room.

"I better go, I'll come round in the morning, we can spend the day together, bye."

"_Bye."_ With that they hung up the phone and Derek went back in to watch the film again.


	19. Chapter 19

A/N: Okay, so here's the next chap for you. Once again, I can't remember if this has been beta-ed or not, I have to say I'm getting confused with it, so please excuse any mistakes.

Enjoy!

* * *

Addison smiled at Derek the next day as she opened the door to him. "Hey," he greeted, walking into her house.

"Hey." She smiled. "Thanks for coming over."

"Don't mention it," He smiled back, pulling her in for a hug. She wrapped her arms around his neck and buried her head into his chest. He took in the scent of her hair, holding her tight.

"I feel sick again." She pulled away slightly.

"You still have morning sickness?" She nodded before placing a hand over her mouth and running back upstairs into the bathroom. Derek followed, pulling her hair out of her face and rubbing her back gently. Once she had emptied the contents of her stomach she leant back onto Derek. Derek whispered soothing words in her ear, pulling her closer to him.

"This suddenly isn't as appealing anymore."

Derek laughed gently, "It'll be over by January."

"That's too long." She pouted making Derek laugh and he kissed her hair. "I don't want to tell my mom today." Addison sighed and snuggled closer to him.

"I'm sure it'll be fine, just don't worry about it."

"You don't know my mom."

"You don't have to do anything you don't want to do." Derek rubbed his hand up and down her arm gently.

"I know I don't, but it's what she could say to me."

"What would she say?"

"I don't know." She sighed. "That's the problem, you can't predict her." Derek just hugged her closer to his chest. "She won't be here until this afternoon, she has to work, work has always come before me."

"She doesn't know what she's missing out on."

She nodded. "So what do you want to do this morning then?"

"I don't mind." He nuzzled his nose into her hair, breathing in her scent.

"Maybe we could go and look at some baby things?"

"Sounds good."

"Okay." She smiled. "I'll just change." Derek nodded, loosening his arms. Addison didn't move from his grasp though. Derek just smiled, running his hand up her arm. "How do you think your sisters will react?"

"They'll go all hyper, knowing them."

"Really?" She looked up at him.

"Yeah. Nothing fazes them."

"Wow, what's it like coming from a big family?"

"Interesting," Derek paused. "Different."

Addison laughed. "I'd like to have more than one baby."

"Really?" Derek's face brightened.

"Yeah." She nodded. "I want this baby to have brothers and sisters. I want them to have the chance I never got." Derek grinned, pulling her into his arms again. She smiled. "What about you?"

"Well, I wouldn't want this baby to be all on their own, would I?"

"No." She leant up and kissed him on the lips. Derek smiled, kissing her back. He pulled her closer, his tongue slipping into her mouth, making her moan. Addison turned in his arms so her body was pressed against his and her arms wrapped around his neck, her fingers playing with his hair. Derek let out a moan and pulled her closer, aware of how she was unintentionally rubbing against his crotch, turning him on. Addison moved so she was nearly on her knees, her hips pressed against his. Derek moaned again and wrapped his arms around her waist, one hand slowly moving under her top and rubbing her back. Both of them could feel the growing bulge in Derek's pants, becoming harder by the second. One of her hands moved and rested on his stomach, her thumb softly caressing it.

"Hmmm." Derek moaned as his tongue massaged hers. Her hips shifting once more, supporting her weight.

"Derek." She breathed, resting her forehead against his once the need for air had become too much. He just looked into her eyes and ran a thumb over her cheek and swollen lips. "Your, erm, your." Her cheeks flushed. Derek looked embarrassed, shifting so that he sat up against the bath. "Does…does it hurt?"

"Er, a bit, when it's uh… confined."

"Sorry." She smiled sheepishly.

"What for?"

"For causing that, and it must hurt now."

Derek smirked, "Oh, it's not a problem. It only hurts when it's confined, otherwise it feels good."

Addison frowned. "But it's confined right now so it's got to hurt."

Derek shrugged. "I don't really mind," He smiled softly at her.

"Is there anything I can do to help?"

"To help...?" Derek raised his eyebrow slightly.

"I caused the problem."

"It was both of us, and I wouldn't call it a problem."

"Then what are you going to do about it?"

"Get rid of it, I guess. I can't go around with a bulge in my pants now can I?"

"No." She smiled.

"Well, then." He smirked.

"Do you, erm, need time to yourself, to erm, you know, get rid of it?"

Derek smiled gratefully. "Yeah, that would be good."

"Okay." She pecked his lips quickly before standing up and leaving the bathroom. Derek watched her leave, smiling to himself as he settled back to get rid of his erection.

----

Addison sat on the couch next to Derek, holding his hand tightly as she waited for her mother and father to enter the living room. "It will be alright," Derek whispered, "I'm staying right here."

"Thank you." She squeezed his hand tightly. Derek sat patiently with Addison, waiting for her parents to arrive. It wasn't long before they walked in, her mother looking irritable. "Hey, mom."

"This better be quick, Addison."

"Erm, I'm pregnant mom." She looked down.

"Excuse me?" She looked at her daughter, as if seeing her for the first time.

"I'm pregnant." Addison repeated. "You're going to be a grandmother."

"I know," she snapped. She looked at Derek, distaste evident on her already pinched features. Addison flinched at her words. Joanna sighed, looking back at Addison. "I'm already late for work, here take this money - it should be enough to take care of it." Her gaze travelled down Addison's her stomach, pursing her lips.

"What? I'm not having an abortion, mom, I'm keeping this baby."

"You are getting rid of it. Do you know how this will look like on me?"

"I don't care, mom, I'm keeping this baby no matter what you say." Addison placed a hand on her bump.

Joanna narrowed her eyes, shaking her head. "I don't have time for this, I need to be at work. We will discuss this later."

"You can't make me get rid of my baby."

"I'm your mother, I have every right to tell you what to do, especially since you're under the age of consent!"

"I'm not getting rid of this baby, this baby is a part of me! I am not going to kill it!"

"You will do what I tell you! You are still a child, you're sixteen, there is no way you are keeping it, especially as it will just be a liability!"

"My baby will not be a liability! I love this baby!"

"You are not going to keep it!"

"I am! Derek and I are going to raise this baby together!"

"You're only sixteen! You have high school to finish, and what are you going to do about college? How are you going to raise it without any qualifications?"

"We'll cope, Derek can go full time, and I can go a few days a week and his family can look after the baby."

"How will he find work without qualifications, huh?"

"He can go to school and college, he can qualify and get a job."

"Maybe your mother is right, Addi, you do have your future to think about. You can start a family with Derek later on." Peter sighed.

"Thank you, Peter." Joanna glared at Addison, crossing her arms.

"I am not getting rid of this baby!"

"You have no choice! You're sixteen years old, we're the parents and we decide what is best for you!"

"You are not taking this baby from me!" Tears rolled down her cheeks.

"Well, maybe you should of waited before jumping into bed with the first guy you see!"

"I didn't jump into bed with him!"

"Who with, then?" Joanna challenged her, "You didn't get pregnant on your own!"

"I was raped!" Addison sobbed. "I didn't choose this."

"You were what?" Joanna's eyes widened, sitting on the nearest surface.

"I was raped." Her voice was quiet.

"Raped..." The word tasted sour on her tongue. "Well, shouldn't that be even more of a reason?"

"No! I am keeping this baby no matter what you say!"

"You'll be faced with a constant reminder of what happened!"

"This baby will not remind me of what happened!"

"This thing," she paused, "was created in a disgusting and vile way!"

"What happened is not this baby's fault, it has nothing to do with the baby." Addison stood from the couch.

"And what if it looks like the guy who raped you, huh?"

"I don't care, you're not taking this baby from me."

"You are sixteen years old Addison! We're your parents, you're still under our care until you're of age, so we decide what's best for you!"

"No! You cannot make me have an abortion, this is my body, not yours!" Addison turned and left the living room, running up the stairs and slamming her bedroom door shut. She searched her bathroom frantically, pulling out a blade and cutting down her arm, watching as the blood dripped, before moving to her other arm.

Derek followed Addison, urgency in his steps. He opened her door, walking through into the bathroom.

"Addison!" She looked up, not realising he had followed her, tears rolling down her cheeks. He stepped closer, feeling his heart break at the sight of Addison. His Addison.

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "I'm so sorry." She had let him down. Suddenly she stood up and pushed past him, running out of the house.

"Addison, wait!" Derek yelled after her, running to her door. She didn't turn around and just ran, ran away from there.


	20. Chapter 20

A/N: There's nine more chapters of this fic to go. Wow. That went fast I must say. Although I did finish writing it ages ago. I hope everyone is still enjoying this fic.

Enjoy!

* * *

Miss Lambert settled on her sofa, ready to watch some trashy television show when she heard a faint knock on her door. Curious as to who could be calling at this late hour, she got up to open the door. Her eyes widened as she saw who her visitor was.

"Addison?"

Addison stood there with tears running down her cheeks and streaks of blood staining her top. "I'm sorry, I didn't know where else to go." Miss Lambert opened the door wider, taking Addison's hand and leading her in her house. She sat her down, and searched in the kitchen for some first aid care. Addison watched her silently as she cleaned her arms up. Miss Lambert didn't say anything as she cleaned up Addison's cuts. When she was finished, she sat next to Addison, a soft smile encouraging her to speak.

"I told my mom." She said quietly and looked down.

"I'm guessing she didn't take it well?"

"She told me that I had to have an abortion and I had no choice in the matter." More tears fell. Miss Lambert closed her eyes, feeling the pain of the young girl. She put an arm around her shoulders, squeezing them gently, not knowing the right words to say to make it all better. "I don't want to go home." Addison let her head rest against Miss Lambert's shoulder.

"You can stay here, I have pyjamas and I can always go to yours in the morning to grab some clothes?" Miss Lambert offered.

"Thanks miss." Addison gave a weak smile.

"You don't need to call me that outside of school," She smiled.

"Okay, Nicola." Addison screwed her nose up. "Sounds kind of weird not calling you miss."

"Well, get used to it." Miss Lambert smiled, hugging her closer.

"Thanks." Addison hugged her back.

"Anytime, sweetie."

"I just don't know what to do anymore." She sighed.

"Try not to think right now." She paused. "Do you want to watch a movie or something? Take your mind off things?"

"Okay." Addison nodded. "What have you got?"

"A lot, mostly all chick flicks."

"What do you suggest then?" Addison smiled slightly.

"Hmmm, something funny."

"Okay…erm, do you have a spare top, this one kind of has blood on it."

"Sure." Miss Lambert smiled slightly, going into her room, returning moments later with a clean long-sleeved top.

"Thanks." Addison pulled hers off so she was only wearing a tank top, and her cuts were visible, before she put the other top on. Miss Lambert turned her back to give the girl privacy, closing her eyes briefly at glancing her cuts. "I know it was stupid." Addison whispered as she pulled the top on, covering her arms.

"No, don't ever think that." Miss Lambert grabbed her shoulders, looking straight at her. "Don't ever think that it's stupid."

"I shouldn't have cut." Her voice was small. Miss Lambert didn't say anything, she just held Addison close, knowing that she needed someone. Slowly tears rolled down Addison's cheek and she clung to Miss Lambert. Miss Lambert rubbed her back soothingly, patiently waiting. "I just want someone to be proud of me, to support me and my decisions."

"You do have someone," Miss Lambert whispered.

"Who?"

"Me."

"Really?"

"Really."

"Thank you." Addison smiled slightly and looked up at her.

"Don't mention it." Miss Lambert smiled, lightly squeezing her shoulder.

"I've never really had anyone there for me."

"I know." Miss Lambert smiled sadly.

"Thank you, though, it means a lot." Miss Lambert smiled, not needing any words to respond. Addison jumped slightly, her hand going to her bump, her eyes wide.

"What is it?" Miss Lambert looked worried, her eyes moving to Addison's stomach

"They kicked," she whispered. "My baby kicked." A grin spread across her face. Miss Lambert's eyes widened, a smile lighting up her face. "My baby is kicking."

"Wow," she whispered, sitting Addison down on the sofa for more comfort.

"They have a strong kick."

"Do you think they'll be a boy or girl?"

"I don't know, but I'd like a girl." She smiled and rubbed her bump.

Miss Lambert smiled, "That would be cool," she agreed.

"But so long as they're healthy and happy I don't care." Miss Lambert nodded, the smile still on her face. "Do you want to feel them kick?"

"Sure." Miss Lambert's smile widened as she placed her hand gently on Addison's stomach.

"Feel the kick?" Addison grinned as the baby continued to kick.

"Yeah," Miss Lambert breathed, wonder filling her face.

"It's amazing, I have a life growing inside of me."

"That's pretty awesome."

"I just can't wait to actually get to hold my baby, to be able to be a mother to my baby." Addison smiled. Miss Lambert had a wistful smile on her face, nodding her head slightly in agreement. "Have you ever thought about having kids?"

"Yeah, I've thought about it."

"Do you want some?"

"Yeah, I'd like one or two. Jamie and I have talked quite a lot about having kids of our own."

"So why haven't you then? You'd be a brilliant mom."

"I don't know, I guess I just haven't had the signs yet."

"Oh, okay, but you will have kids in the future?"

"Hopefully."

"Good." Addison smiled. "Otherwise it would be a waste of someone who would make a brilliant mom."

"You think so?"

"I know so."

"Well, if I don't have any, you'll be brilliant enough for the both of us."

"I really won't, I know I'll somehow screw up."

"You won't, you may make some mistakes, but hey - no one's perfect."

"I just feel that I'm so screwed up that I'll somehow screw this baby up and they'll hate me for it."

"No, your life has nothing to do with the baby's - it's all in the past."

Addison just nodded and rubbed her bump. "Will you be a godmother to my baby? Just in case anything ever happens."

"I'd be honoured," Miss Lambert grinned.

"Thank you." Addison smiled. "And thanks for letting me stay here."

"You're more than welcome."

"I don't want to intrude or anything."

"You're not, and you never will be."

"What about you and Jamie though?"

"That doesn't matter, we have a spare room you can stay in, so it will be like having a daughter in the house." She smiled.

"Okay." Addison smiled as well.

"Everything will be okay."

"You think so?"

"Yeah. It may not seem like it right now, but the only way to go when you hit rock bottom is up."

"Yeah, you're right, thanks." Addison smiled.

"It's not a problem." Miss Lambert gave her a reassuring smile.

----

Once they'd had dinner, Addison decided to go take a bath; she needed some time alone to think. Miss Lambert sat down on her couch again and turned on the TV. She had just settled herself to watch a programme as the doorbell rang. She pulled herself up and went to answer it.

"Derek, what are you doing here?"

"Is Addi here? Please tell me she's here, she just ran off and I can't find her anywhere…"

She quickly interrupted him. "Derek, calm down, she's here, she's fine. She's a little shook up but she's fine."

"She is?" He breathed a sigh of relief. "I want to see her."

"Addison wants to be on her own at the moment."

"Please. I need to see she's alright."

"Derek, honestly, she's fine, she just needs time, I'll get her to call you later if you want." He sighed and nodded at her. "Okay, I'll tell her to call you so you can stop worrying." Miss Lambert gave him a comforting smile.

"Okay, thanks, I just want to make sure she's alright."

"And she is, there's no need to worry. You should go and get some rest."

"Okay, night Miss." He slowly walked away from the house, glancing up at the top windows. Derek made his way back home, thinking about Addison the whole time.

Miss Lambert made her way up the stairs and knocked on the door to the guest room. She heard a small 'come in' before she pushed open the door and saw Addison sat cross legged in the middle of the double bed, wearing the sweats and long sleeve top she was lent. Addison's hands were placed on her bump and she was sat up straight. "Hey." Addison smiled at Miss Lambert as she entered.

"Hey," She sat down on the side of the bed and looked at Addison. "That was Derek at the door, he wanted to see you, to make sure you're alright. He was really worried when he didn't know where you were, he really cares about you."

Addison looked down and rubbed her bump gently. "I shouldn't have ran off like that," she whispered.

"He really cares, Ads, I told him I'd get you to ring him later and let him know that you are okay, put his mind at ease."

Addison nodded. "Okay." She reached for her cell on the night stand. "I'll ring him now."

"I'll give you some privacy." Miss Lambert stood and smiled at Addison before leaving the room and closing the door behind her.

Addison slipped open her phone and searched through her contacts for Derek's number, hitting dial when she found it. She listened to the dialling tone for a short moment before he quickly answered. _"Hello? Addison?"_

"Hey, it's me." She smiled at hearing his voice.

"_Are you okay? I was so worried, I looked but I couldn't find you and then…"_

"Derek, calm down, I'm fine, okay I'm fine." She smiled as she heard the concern in his voice.

"_I was just worried."_ He admitted.

"I know, and I'm sorry I made you worry, but I just need time to myself tonight, you can see me tomorrow, I promise. Anyway I have something to show you."

"_Really? What?"_

"Well, if I tell you now it's not going to be a surprise, is it?"

"_No, I suppose not. What time do you want to see me?"_

"Erm, I don't know, I doubt I'll go to school, I'll just stay here."

"_Do you want me to stay with you?"_

"Derek, you shouldn't miss school just because of me."

"_I don't care, I'd do anything for you Addi."_

She beamed widely. "Okay, if you're sure."

"_Of course I'm sure, and it's only sports day, it's not that important, it's near the end of the school year."_

"Yeah it is." She paused, not really wanting to end the conversation, but knew she was being a little selfish. "I'll let you go, you've probably got things to be doing."

"_No, no I haven't, and I'd rather talk to you anyway."_

"Aww, Derek, you're so sweet." She laughed and they carried on talking.

---

"Hey." Miss Lambert looked up and smiled as Jamie entered. "How was your day, babe?"

He leant down and kissed her. "I missed you so much, I just want to hold you right now." He sat next to her and pulled her close, and she instantly snuggled up to his side.

"Bad day?"

"Yeah," He sighed and placed a kiss on her hair, closing his eyes. "I don't know why I keep doing this job."

"Because you love it." She looked up at him.

"I do, but I love you more." He pecked her on the lips again. "I should spend more time here, with you, especially if we want to start a family." He smiled at her.

"You don't have to give up your job, I know how much you love it."

"I'd rather be here with you, though, I'll find something else something better, don't worry about it." He smiled at her.

She smiled back. "One of my students, Addison, she's staying here for a little while."

"Why?" He looked at her, confusion clouding his face.

"She's having a bit of a hard time and it's best if she stays here for a little while. She's a lovely girl, you'll like her, just don't push her into talking or anything."

"Oh…okay then."

"And she's pregnant."

"Pregnant? And she's one of your students?" He looked at her, shocked.

"Don't start having a go, it's not what you think okay."

"Then what is it?"

"I'm not going to tell you, it's not something she wants broadcasted to everyone."

"Oh…" Jamie just looked at his girlfriend.

"She has no one else she feels she can turn to, apart from her boyfriend."

"Okay, it's fine." He pulled her close, kissing her hair again. He loved how his girlfriend was so compassionate.


	21. Chapter 21

A/N: Sorry that I haven't updated this fic in a while but I wanted it beta-ed before I uploaded it, sorry.

Enjoy!!

* * *

Jamie smiled as he walked down the stairs the next morning; he stretched and gave a small yawn, missing the last two stairs. He strolled happily into the kitchen then stopped in the doorway. He hadn't got to meet Addison the night before, but now it looked like he would. He watched the redhead reach up into the cupboard and pull out a glass. He noticed that she was wearing long sleeves, even though it was warm. She poured herself half a glass of water and took a few sips before placing the glass on the side and resting her hands on her stomach. Jamie looked closer and could see her bump, although it might have had something to do with the fact that what she has on was tight, and what he believed to be his girlfriend's. He smiled as he watched her caress her bump lovingly and bend her head slightly to watch her hands. He didn't want to interrupt her, but he needed some coffee.

"Morning." She turned around and jumped, her eyes going wide as she stared at him. "Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. I'm Jamie, Nikki's boyfriend." He smiled at her. "You must be Addison." She nodded slowly and stepped back. "Look I really am sorry I frightened you. You don't have to be scared." He switched on the coffee maker and turned to face her again, leaning his hip against the counter.

"How did you sleep?"

"Okay, thanks, maybe I should just…"

"Morning." Miss Lambert smiled brightly as she entered the kitchen, freshly showered and dressed. She pecked Jamie on the lips and smiled at Addison. "Did you get a good night's sleep?"

"Yeah, I did, thanks."

"Good, do you want any breakfast?" Addison shook her head. "You should eat something. We have cereal, toast, erm... pancakes can be made." She turned to face Addison.

"Erm…"

"I'll make pancakes for all of us." Jamie offered.

"Sure, sounds good." Miss Lambert smiled. "That okay with you, Ads?" Addison nodded silently and sat at the island in the kitchen. She watched Nicola and Jamie interact with each other; Nicola made them both coffee as he made the pancakes, teasing her every now and then. They were happy together, Addison could clearly see that.

"What do you want on your pancakes, Addison?" Jamie smiled at her.

"Oh, erm, honey please."

"Okay then." He smiled and pulled the honey from the cupboard, putting some on Addison's pancakes and handing her the plate, before placing his and Nicola's at the island as well before they all began to eat.

"Are you feeling up to going to school today?" Nicola looked at Addison.

"No." She shook her head. "I'd rather stay home, Derek said he'd stay with me, actually he insisted." She smiled.

"Well, you won't miss much, only sports day, and you wouldn't be taking part anyway. I was hoping Derek would have, but never mind, he's better off here with you." Nicola smiled. "What time is he coming over?"

"Oh, erm, I'm not sure, maybe nine."

"Okay, that's fine, we'll both be gone by then."

"Okay."

"I'll leave you our cell numbers in case you need anything."

"Thanks," Addison replied.

"No problem."

Once they had finished eating Nicola cleared away while Jamie finished getting ready, heading back down the stairs and into the kitchen once he was.

"Right I'm off now, I'll see you tonight." He placed his hands on Nicola's waist and pulled her in for a kiss. "Have a good day, see you, babe." He smiled and left the house.

"He seems nice," Addison commented. "You're happy together."

"We are." Nicola smiled. "Why don't you go up and take a shower, I'll go find some clothes for you to wear today."

"Okay thanks," Addison nodded and headed up the stairs.

Right on nine o'clock the doorbell rang and Addison answered it, smiling as she saw Derek stood outside. "Hey…" She was cut off as he pulled her into a tight hug, placing a kiss on her hair.

"I was so worried," he whispered into her hair.

"I'm fine, Derek, honestly, I'm okay."

"I know, I just need to hold you right now." Addison nodded and wrapped her arms around his neck, burying her head into his chest. After a few minutes Derek pulled away and looked down at her, running his thumb over her cheek.

"Come here, I have something to show you." She took hold of his hand and pulled him inside, shutting the front door. She lifted her top revealing her bump and pressed his hand against it. "Feel that?" Addison watched the expression on his face change, a wide smile spread across his face and his eyes lit up, his fingers spreading on her bump.

"That's just…amazing."

"I know." She beamed at him. Slowly Derek lowered himself to his knees, pushing her top so it sat on top of her bump. He placed his other hand the other side of her bump and let his thumbs caress it. Addison just watched him with interest. Derek leant forward and place gentle kisses against her skin.

"Hello in there," He smiled as he felt a kick against his hand. "I'm going to be your daddy…" He looked up at Addison unsure of if it was what she wanted, but she just smiled widely at him. Derek smiled as well and continued to talk to the baby.

"Me and mommy already love you very much, and you are going to get spoilt by your grandma and four aunties, we all can't wait to meet you, but right now you need to grow and get strong so you can come into this world and be spoilt rotten." He smiled and placed more kisses on her bump.

When Derek looked up at Addison he saw the tears in her eyes and quickly stood, his thumb running over her cheek. "Hey, what's wrong? Why are you crying?"

"It's nothing," She shook her head and wiped her eyes. "It's just what you said, it's so sweet and… damn these hormones." She wiped at the tears that fell.

"Hey, it's okay, you don't have to cry." He kissed her forehead. "It'll be okay." He pulled her in for another hug, as the tears made their way down her cheeks.

"I'm so sorry, Der, I am so, so sorry, I never should have done that. I am so sorry for making you worry. God, I am so sorry." She began to sob on his shoulder.

"Hey, shh, it's okay," He ran his hand up and down her back. "Shh, it's okay, it doesn't matter now, just shh, okay, shh." He held her close and whispered soothing words in her ear as she sobbed, gradually starting to calm down. "Okay now?" he asked quietly.

Addison nodded her head and pulled away from him. "I look such a mess, you shouldn't have to see me like this." She turned towards the stairs.

"Hey." He grabbed her shoulders gently. "I don't mind that you look like this right now, we all have our moments, and no matter, you'll always look beautiful to me." He smiled at her.

"I don't deserve you, Derek, I really don't."

"You do, you deserve a lot more than you think you do." He ran his thumb over her chin. "Don't always put yourself down, okay?" Addison nodded and looked up at him, leaning up and kissing him on the lips. He softly kissed her back, holding her close.

"I should go and sort my make-up out."

"Okay." He pecked her lips one more time before she went back up the stairs, and Derek sat on the couch waiting for her.

-------

Derek smiled and gently ran a hand through Addison's red locks. He watched as she shifted slightly in her sleep. They were sat on the couch and she had fallen asleep an hour before hand. Her head was resting against his chest, one of her hands lightly on his stomach and her body curled against his side. He twirled a strand of her hair around his fingers and rubbed her bump lightly with his other hand. He had stopped paying attention to whatever was on TV, his attention had been on Addison, just watching her, taking in all the little details. He watched as her finger grasped his shirt lightly, then relaxed again, her body snuggling closer, and he felt a little kick hit his side. He could feel the curve of her bump against his side, and he could lightly feel some of the baby's movements as Addison snuggled closer.

His phone started to ring and he cursed silently, quickly flipping it open to silence it. "Hello?" He whispered, looking down to see if it had woken Addison.

"_Derek, can you pick up some food for dinner tonight please?"_

He sighed as he heard his mother's voice. "Later, mom, I'm with Addi right now." He watched as Addison started to stir lightly. "I got to go mom, she's starting to wake up, I'll ring you later." He quickly hung up and smiled as she groggily opened her eyes. "Hello, sleeping beauty." He kissed her forehead.

"Hmm, what time is it?"

"Ten past one, you've slept for over an hour." He smiled. "Are you hungry? I'll make you some lunch."

"Yeah, thanks, that sounds nice." She smiled up at him and stretched, sitting up and rubbing her stomach.

"Okay." Derek stood and walked into the kitchen, while Addison followed and sat at the island. "Sandwiches okay?"

"Yeah." She nodded and smiled. "Want some help?"

"No, you just sit there." Addison smiled a twirled a strand of hair around her finger, watching him. He handed her some of the sandwiches and sat down, before they started to eat.

"Thanks for staying with me today."

"No problem, there's nowhere else I'd rather be." He smiled at her.

-----

Miss Lambert sighed as she opened her front door; it had been a long day, full of active teenagers. She shut the door behind her and walked further into the hallway, noticing how quiet the house was. She looked into the living room and saw no one there, then checked the kitchen before making her way up the stairs. She wanted to make sure that Addison was alright. She knocked softly on the door and called Addison's name before pushing open the door, gasping at the sight. "God, I'm sorry, I'll just..." She shut the door again to give the two some privacy.

Addison looked up shocked as she saw Miss Lambert stood in the doorway. Her and Derek were laid on her bed, Derek on top of her, one hand supporting his weight, the other under her top upon her breast. "Why does everyone catch us making out?" She sighed and buried her head into the crook of his neck, wrapping her arms around him.

"I don't know." He kissed her hair, removing his hand and lying next to her. He pulled her closer and just held her.

After ten minutes Addison and Derek walked down the stairs and into the living room where Nicola was sat on the couch, and smiled at them amused. "I hope the two of you have done more than just that all day." She raised an eyebrow at them but kept a smile, making them feel at ease.

"We did, we watched a film." Addison smiled.

"What film was it?"

"Erm, I don't know," She smiled sheepishly. "I feel asleep."

Nicola smiled. "Okay then, and is there any point in asking you or did you fall asleep as well?" She looked at Derek and a small blush appeared on his cheeks.

"I was, erm, kind of watching Addi the whole time." Nicola just smiled and Addison blushed as well. "I should erm, probably go home now, I'll see you tomorrow."

"Okay." Addison smiled up at him and he bent down and kissed her quickly, before leaving. Addison sat down on the couch next to Nicola and avoided eye contact.

"You don't have to act all awkward because I walked in on you and Derek making out, it's your choice and I'm not going to tell you you're being stupid, and I know you two are sensible anyway." Nicola smiled. "But next time you may want to lock the door."

Addison smiled. "Thanks, I've already had the lecture, twice before."

"I know, but seriously, next time, lock the door." She paused. "So how about a movie?"

"Sure." Addison smiled and they settled themselves down on the couch before Jamie came home.


	22. Chapter 22

A/N: Okay, I am so sorry that this has taken a while to be updated, but I wanted it beta-ed before I let you read. So, I am really sorry about the long wait, but on the other hand, it menas this fic doesn't finish as fast. But please leave me a review and tell me what you think. :D

Enjoy!

* * *

A week later and Addison was ready to go back home and face her dad. She didn't have to stay if she didn't want to, but she needed to go back to talk to him. She had been told that she could go back to Miss Lambert's if that was where she felt more comfortable. She was always welcome.

With a deep breath Addison walked into her dad's house, quietly shutting the door behind her. She heard movement in the kitchen before her dad appeared, shocked when he saw her.

"Ads…"

"Hey, dad…" They just stood looking at each other awkwardly for a while.

"Where have you been?" he said finally.

"You never seemed to care before, you never rang or looked," she snapped. "Why should I tell you?"

Peter sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

"I'm keeping this baby no matter what."

"Addison, I think your mother is right, you're too young to be a parent. You both are. It's not even his baby, he can walk out on you anytime and then what are you going to do? You'll have a tiny baby to look after on your own. You have your education to think about as well, it would be a good idea to get rid of the baby and concentrate on your education before having a family."

"No! I don't care what you think! This is my baby and my decision! I am not getting rid of my baby! This baby means more to me than my education! You can't make me get rid of my baby!" She ran up the stairs, a hand protectively on her bump.

Addison went straight to her room, pulled out a bag and started throwing clothes in. She put as much as she could into the bag before picking up her overnight bag and filling that, mostly with make-up, toiletries, a hairbrush and other things she knew she'd need. She threw a few photos that she cherished into her bag and zipped them up, placing them on her shoulders. Addison looked around her room one more time before taking a deep breath and heading back down the stairs.

Peter looked up as Addison walked down the stairs, carrying her overnight bag and a bigger one.

"Where are you going?"

"Away from you." She walked towards the door.

"No Addison, you are not leaving."

"Yes, I am." She pulled open the front door and reached the top step.

"No, you're not! You're staying here and we're talking about this!" He raised his voice, something he had never done to her. Addison just ignored him and went down the steps, blocking out anything else he said to her.

------

Jamie yawned as he walked down the stairs; it was mid morning on a Saturday and he liked to sleep late. He was dressed in a pair of boxers and sweats pants, nothing on the top. The doorbell rang again as he reached the bottom of the stairs. He reached forward and opened the door, looking at Addison stood there. She had obviously been crying and she had a bag at her feet.

"Can I come in?" She sniffed and looked down.

"Sure, let me take your bag." He picked up her bag and let her walk inside, shutting the door behind her. "Are you okay?" He knew that her family life was hell, but he didn't know much more, she hadn't let him in yet and he wasn't going to push it. Addison just shook her head and more tears started to fall.

"Jay, who is it?" Nicola appeared on the top of the stairs wearing one of his t-shirts that was way too big for her and a pair of short shorts, wondering why her boyfriend hadn't sent them away and gone back to bed with her. Jamie looked up at her and stepped back slightly, revealing Addison.

"Ads." Nicola instantly made her way down the stairs, wrapping her arms around Addison who began to sob. "Hey, what's wrong? What happened?"

"He…he told that….and then he…but I…I'm not…"

"Shh, calm down, take a deep breath." She ran a hand up and down Addison's back, trying to calm her sobs. "Just shh."

Jamie just stood back and watched them. "I'll take her bag upstairs, give you two some time." He picked up her bag again, knowing that what Addison needed right now was a friend. Jamie turned and walked up at the stairs as Nicola and Addison sat down on the couch.

"Okay, now take a deep breath and tell me what happened." Nicola studied Addison.

"He…he said that, I should get rid of this baby." Her hand moved to her stomach. "That we're too young, and that Derek could leave me at any time because it's not his baby." Tears rolled down her cheeks again.

"That's not going to happen, Derek is not going to leave you, he cares for you too much, and you will always have me, no matter what."

"I don't want to go back, I don't want to see them, I just can't."

"You don't have to. Ads, you can stay here. You can stay as long as you like." Nicola smiled.

"Thank you."

"No problem, now why don't you go and take a nice hot bath, calm down a bit?" Addison nodded and wiped her eyes. "Come on then." Nicola stood up with Addison, leading her upstairs and into the bathroom. "I'll go get you some clean towels." She turned the taps on before disappearing to get some towels, returning a few minutes later. "Give me a shout if you need anything."

"Okay thanks mis…Nicola."

"No problem." She smiled and left Addison alone.

Addison made sure the water was the right temperature before stripping and lowering herself into the bath, smiling as she looked at her stomach and saw the baby kicking, splashing the water about. "Hey baby, there's no need to kick the water about." She placed her hands where the baby was kicking, smiling wider as she felt the kicks against her hands. "You should let mommy have a bath in peace, and I doubt Nikki will be happy with water on the floor." Addison continued to talk to her baby as she took a bath.

---

Jamie smiled as he felt two arms wrapped around his waist from behind and a head bury into his back. He placed his hands on her arms pulling her around to his front, dropping a kiss on her hair.

"She okay?" He whispered.

Nicola sighed. "I don't know, I can't understand her parents, I mean I get that they're going to be upset that she's pregnant, but they should be supporting her choice. She's being so brave, yet all they are doing is making it harder for her."

"She has you and Derek, she'll come through the other side stronger." He just held his girlfriend close.

"Yeah, I'm just afraid that something else will push her too far and she won't get through it."

"She will."

"How can you be so sure?" Nicola looked up at Jamie who just looked at her confidently.

"Because you will be there with her, you'll make sure she gets through it. I know you will." He kissed her forehead.

----

Derek sat on his couch and fidgeted. He was worried about Addison. He knew she was going to go back home and face her dad, but he had no idea how it had gone. He just wanted to pick up the phone and call her, or even go see her.

"Derek, just call her, she won't mind." Kathryn smiled at her son.

"You really think so?" He looked up at her.

"I know she'll love to hear your voice, just call her."

"Okay." Derek smiled and flipped open his cell, dialling Addison's number and listening to the dialling tone. It just seemed to ring and ring and panic started to set in. What if she had cut herself again but it was too deep? What if something had happened? So many scenarios ran through his mind that he missed the phone being answered.

"_Hello? Hello? Derek? Hello Derek? Are you there?"_

"Huh? Wh…what? Addison!" Relief swept through him. "You're alright, you didn't answer straight away and I started to worry." He could hear her laugh softly on the other end. "What's so funny?" He smiled slightly.

"_You're such a bit softie, I'm fine Derek, but I'm back at Nikki's. I'm not going home again."_

"What happened?" His voice was soft, but Addison could hear the concern in it.

"_They want me to get rid of this baby, they don't want me to have it, no matter what I want. Dad said that because this isn't your baby you can leave any time and then I'll be stuck a single parent."_

"I'm not going to leave you, Addi, I care about you a lot, I wouldn't ever leave you. You'll always have me as a friend, no matter what. I…I…"

"_Oh, I've got to go now, but that means a lot. I'll call you later, bye."_

"Addi, wait!" She hung up the phone. "I love you…" he whispered.


	23. Chapter 23

A/N: Okay, so here's the next chapter for you guys. I hope you enjoy it :D

* * *

Nicola giggled as Jamie ran his hands up and down her sides, right over her ticklish spots, going extra slow there, making her giggle even more. He smirked and kissed her neck and collar bone. She closed her eyes and moved her hands over his back, gasping as he started to make love to her.

Nicola smiled up at Jamie and gently pecked his lips. "I love you, Jay."

"I love you too." He kissed her back and reached over for his night stand, opening the drawer and pulling something out. "Nikki, I love you so much, I love you with all my heart, I never want to lose you," He caressed her cheek.

"You're not going to lose me." She smiled at him.

"Shh." He placed his index on her lips. "Let me finish, as I was saying, I don't want to live without you, ever. I want us to be together and have a family, Nikki. I want you to be my wife. Will you marry me?" Jamie opened the small box in his hand showing her the ring inside and he heard her gasp, and saw her eyes widen. Tears filled them as she looked at him and then the ring. "Well? Will you be Mrs. Thorp?"

Tears rolled down her cheeks as she looked at him. She pressed her lips to his, pulling him closer. "Yes. Yes. Of course I want to marry you, Jay, I always have." She kissed him again and he slipped the ring on her finger, pulling back to admire it. "It's perfect, Jay."

"I spent months looking for the right one." Jamie smiled and kissed her again. "Shall we celebrate getting engaged then?" He started to kiss down her neck.

"Hmm," was Nicola's only reply as they began to make love once again.

----

"What about this one?" Addison lightly ran her fingers over the top of a crib.

Nicola walked closer and placed her hand on top of it as well. "Yeah, it is a nice one, it's good." She turned to look at Addison who was stood staring shocked, looking at her left hand. "Ads..?"

"You're…" Addison pointed to Nicola's ring. "You and Jamie are..?"

"Yeah," Nicola beamed. "He proposed this morning, I'm so happy."

Addison grinned at her, "I'm so happy for you guys, you deserve each other." She wrapped her arms around Nicola and hugged her tightly before pulling back. "So how did he propose then?"

"Oh…" Nicola blushed, not sure if she wanted to share that story. "Well, we were in bed this morning, and he proposed."

"Just like that? Out of the blue? You were just led in bed?"

"Erm, yeah, something like that." Nicola felt her cheeks burn the same colour as Addison's hair.

"Oh my god, you two were…okay, that's not something I need to think about." Addison screwed her face up before laughing and Nicola joined in as well. "That is a sweet way, though, why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"I wanted to, but you were already with Derek this morning, I was going to tell you when we got back."

Addison smiled. "I'm really happy for you."

"Thanks," Nicola smiled as well and glanced over to where Jamie and Derek were stood. "Come on, this isn't sorting out your crib problem, what about this one?" She showed Addison another one.

Once one had been found that both Addison and Nicola liked, they called Derek over to look at it and agree, whether it was what he wanted or not. Derek looked at it before smiling and nodding, making Addison squeal with delight and hug him tightly. They decided on the colour white since they didn't know the sex of the baby and didn't plan to until Addison gave birth. They then moved onto a matching changing table as well, before looking at a stroller and everything else. The whole time Derek just had to agree with what the women picked out.

"What are we going to do about clothes though? We can't buy dresses because it could be a boy, but then if we buy boy's clothes it could be a girl." Addison frowned.

"Well, you could buy mostly stuff that both can wear, like baby grows until the baby is born. Then you buy more clothes, and you can buy a bit of both for now and you can always keep them for years to come when you have another." Nicola smiled.

"Yeah." Addison grinned. "That's a good idea." They walked off towards the clothes.

"This is going to take a while." Jamie laughed. "She loves shopping, and she loves babies. This is a bad combination."

"Addi loves shopping as well. I get the feeling we will go home with no money left."

"And we're the ones who get to carry the bags."

"So true." Derek smiled and they watched the girls look through the clothes, smiles lighting up their faces. "This is cute." Derek held up a little pink dress.

"It is." Jamie smiled as well. "Do you want a boy or a girl?"

"I don't mind."

"Oh, come on, you must want one more. Don't you want a son?"

"I would like a son, but I think I want a daughter more. I mean, I can protect her and she can be a daddy's girl. And the fact she'll probably look like Addison." Derek smiled. "I'd like a daughter, we can have a son later."

"Somehow I think girls are easier." Jamie smiled. "And if mine looked like Nikki, then just, wow, she'd be amazing. I'd have two amazing girls in my life."

"You going to have kids then?" Derek continued looking through the clothes on the rack near him.

"Yeah, we are. I don't know when though, but we both want kids."

----

Addison snuggled up to Derek's side as they sat on the couch watching the TV. "My mom has some baby stuff we can have as well, we could make a nursery at mine if you wanted. You and the baby can come over and you can have a break from them if you wanted."

"Sure." She smiled. "That'll be nice. I got you something today."

"Me?" He looked down at her.

"Yeah, come on I'll show you." She stood up and took hold of his hand, dragging him up the stairs behind her and into the room she was using.

"Here." She picked up a carrier bag and handed it to him. Derek took it and looked inside, pulling out the material and opening it, his eyes widening as he looked at it. "Do you like it?"

"I love it." He smiled widely and looked at the baby grow in his hands with the words 'I love my daddy' across it. Derek pulled her closer and kissed her on the lips. "It's perfect." He kissed her again, making her giggle.

"I thought you'd like it, and so does the baby." She smiled and placed a hand on her bump.

Derek grinned and placed his hand on top of hers. "So they do." He smiled as he felt a kick against their hands.

----

Jamie ran his fingers lightly through Nicola's hair that was sprawled across his lap. Nicola laid across the couch, her head in his lap, her eyes on the TV as the film played. Jamie had no idea what was going on in the film; it was a flick chick her and Addison wanted to watch, and him and Derek were suffering through it. Addison was curled up to Derek on the smaller couch, her head against Derek's stomach. He had one hand resting on her hip, the other protectively on her stomach.

"I love this bit." Addison smiled and snuggled closer.

"Yeah, I do as well." Nicola shifted slightly against Jamie.

"How much longer is this on for?"

"Shh, you'll miss the best part."

With only about twenty minutes left of the film, Jamie fell asleep, his head resting back against the couch. Nicola looked up at him and smiled, sitting upright and reaching for a pen. Addison turned her head and looked at Nicola who just put her finger to her lips as Addison opened her mouth to ask what she was doing. Nicola unscrewed the lid of the pen and lightly placed it against Jamie's upper lip. Slowly she began to draw a line, but stopped as he opened his eyes.

"What are you doing?"

"Sorry, I've just always wanted to do that." She giggled and put the pen down.

"You drew on me?" He raised his eyebrows.

"Well, nearly, you woke up and stopped me." She rubbed at the pen on him and he rolled his eyes. "Sorry, babe." She quickly pecked his cheek.

"You better be."

"I am." She smiled at him and he smiled back, pecking her lips.


	24. Chapter 24

A/N: Okay, I am so sorry that this has taken me a while to update, I really am. I suck at updating I swear. This chapter hasn't been beta-ed, but I have read through it looking for mistakes.

Okay, so I like the first part, but then, so far in, I don't really like how it went, but it kind of needed to happen, I'm jsut not happy with it.

Enjoy

* * *

"Why am I here again?" Addison whined as she stood closer to Derek. Mark was in a rugby match and Derek had dragged Addison along to watch it. Even though it was August, it had been raining for most of the night before and that morning, meaning it was cold and wet, and the grass was really muddy.

"To support Mark." Derek smiled and pulled her closer, feeling her back press into his stomach.

"But I don't like rugby and it's muddy, my shoes are going to be ruined." She complained.

"Well then you shouldn't have worn them."

"You never told me we would be stood on a field watching them!" She huffed and crossed her arms. Derek sighed, knowing it was no use arguing with her. He wrapped his rams tighter around her and let his hands rest on her five month pregnant bump. She was not able to wear any of her own clothes any more without stretching them, and had thrown a few fits about that. She had taken to wearing a t-shirt of Derek's to bed and a pair of shorts, he had no idea how she acquired one of his tops. He had no idea she had until he had stayed too late at Miss Lambert's and ended up spending the night.

"Yes! Go Mark!" He cheered as he watched his friend run down the pitch with the ball.

"I don't get this game."

"You keep telling me that."

"And my feet are starting to hurt."

"Don't worry, it's nearly over and we can go home." He kissed her neck and held her close, breathing in her scent. She nodded and leaned into him, placing her hands on top of his on her bump. They continued to watch the game until it finished, Mark's team losing by one point. "Come on, we'll meet Mark and walk back with him."

"It's really muddy though." She looked at the floor. Derek rolled his eyes before scooping her up into his arms, making her squeal with surprise. "What are you doing?!"

"Carrying you, you can't get muddy this way, and the path is just over there." Derek began walking towards the path as she wrapped her arms around his neck, ignoring anyone looking at them.

"Hey guys." Mark jogged over to them, covered in mud from the game, a bag slung over his shoulder. "What's with her?" He pointed at Addison in Derek's arms.

"She doesn't want to get muddy."

"Oh," Mark chuckled. "What is it with girls and not getting muddy?"

"I don't know." They continued to walk, Derek still carrying Addison. He set her down on her feet when they reached the path, he smiled at her and took hold of her hand.

"Hey, Mark, you coming with us?" One of the other rugby players called out to him.

"Erm," Mark glanced at Derek.

"Go man, I'll be fine with Addi."

"Thanks, see you later." Mark ran towards the rest of the team.

"Come on, let's go home." Derek and Addison started walking home.

"How about Leo-Dean?"

"What?" Addison looked up at him as they strolled along.

"For the baby, if it's a boy, Leo-Dean Montgomery."

"Oh…yeah, I like it, it sounds good." She smiled. "Leo-Dean for a boy and Jessica Samantha for a girl."

"They're perfect." Derek grinned.

"They are." She stood on tiptoes and pecked his cheek. He smiled and pulled her close as they walked along.

"Now my sisters will stop arguing over what we're going to call the baby, all they want to do is spoil them."

Addison smiled and leaned her head against his shoulder as they walked.

"Although I bet they'll start arguing over whether it's a boy or a girl."

"Well, we're not knowing until they're born."

"Yeah, we'll wait." He smiled and kissed the top of her head as they walked towards his house.

-

Ten minutes later and they arrived home, Derek opening the door and letting Addison walk in first. They left their shoes by the door and walked into the living room, where Kathleen and Nancy were.

"Hey Addi!" They smiled at her.

"Oh my god, you've gotten bigger since we last saw you." Kathleen squealed.

"Well she is pregnant you idiot." Nancy rolled her eyes at her sister.

"Oh shut up!" Kathleen threw a cushion at Nancy who threw it back, before a fight started. Derek shook his head and led Addison into the kitchen where his mom stood making dinner.

"Hey mom."

"Oh hey Derek, hey Addi." Kathryn smiled widely. "Addi you're just glowing, look at you." She looked at Addison who just blushed slightly. "Not long to go now, four months."

"Yeah, I can't wait." Addison smiled.

"Well you two will make great parents, sit down, put your feet up. Derek can help me make dinner."

"Why me?" He looked at his mother.

"Because I said so, now Addi sit."

Addison smiled and sat down at the island and watched as Derek helped.

"We've finally decided on names." Derek hesitated glancing at Addison slightly.

"Really? That's good, what are they?"

"Jessica Samantha for a girl, and Leo-Dean for a boy."

"They're nice names," Kathryn smiled. "I like them."

"We do as well." Derek grinned.

"Well I can't wait to meet my first grandchild."

----

"Oww." Derek rubbed his shin as Addison kicked him. She had been tossing and turning for the past half an hour and had hit him a few times. He didn't have the heart to wake her up but he was afraid he'd end up covered in bruises. Normally she'd sleep fine, but she didn't seem to be tonight. Derek sighed as she turned and smacked him with her arm. He reached his arms out and pulled her close, hoping she wouldn't be as restless after. Slowly she stopped moving and snuggled against his side, sleeping peacefully. Derek smiled and closed his eyes, letting himself drift off to sleep.

---

"I'll be fine Der, I can walk to Nikki's on my own, I'll be fine." She smiled at him. He had started to become protective of her and she loved it at times but sometimes hated it.

"I can walk with you if you want."

"Honestly, Der, I'll be fine." Addison leaned up and kissed him on the lips, her hands resting against his chest. "I'll text you when I get in, don't worry okay?"

Derek hesitated. "Okay then, but text me."

"I will." Addison smiled and walked down the steps waving at Derek as she started walking back to Nicola's.

She was about five minutes away when she felt someone grab her arm and she spun around to face Steve. "Hello Addison," He smirked. "How nice to see you again." He stepped closer. "Now we have a little problem here, it turns out that I have gonorrhoea, now who were you sleeping with while we were together?"

"What? No one." She looked at him.

"Well then how do you explain the fact I have gonorrhoea?" He raised his eyebrows at her.

"I…I don't know, but it didn't come from me, I swear." She started to panic, if he had gonorrhoea that could mean she could have as well.

"Really? You never slept with anyone else?"

She shook her head and he let go of her arm cursing.

"Fucking Brittany, she told me she wasn't sleeping with anyone else!"

"Who…who's Brittany?"

"My new girlfriend, not that you care." He spat before turning around and storming off, as Addison let out a relived sigh, she couldn't have gonorrhoea, could she? Addison quickly turned and headed towards Nicola's, worry still filling her mind. Once she reached there she quickly walked in, shutting the door behind her.

"Hey," Nicola smiled as she left the kitchen. "Are you okay? You look pale."

"Erm, no, I just saw Steve."

"Steve? Did he hurt you?" Nicola quickly rushed forward.

"No." Addison shook her head. "But he's got gonorrhoea, I could have it." Tears filled her eyes.

"Come here," Nicola pulled Addison into a hug. "Do you know who gave it to him?"

"His new girlfriend."

"Well if he stared sleeping with her after you moved, you'll be fine, but we can go and get you tested anyway if you want."

Addison just nodded. "Oh god I can't have an STD I just can't." She started to sob.

"Shh, shh, it'll be okay, it'll be okay." Nicola ran her hand up and down Addison's back. "It'll be okay, come on, we'll go get you tested okay." Addison nodded again.

----

Addison sat with her hands shaking as she held the envelope that contained the test results. She would know now if she had an STD. Carefully she hooked her finger under the edge of the envelope and began to open it, pulling out the piece of paper. She unfolded it and began to read, tears filling her eyes.

"What does it say?" Nicola looked at Addison who just handed her the piece of paper.

"I don't have it." Addison smiled as a tear rolled down her cheek. "I'm fine."

"See, I told you." Nicola smiled as well and pulled Addison into a hug.


	25. Chapter 25

A/N: Sorry, this has taken me a while to upload it. It's all written, it just needs uploading, and I'm sure we all agree that I suck at uploading, right?

Anyway, this chapter is...well, it's not exactly fluff, but it's not exactly angst. It's more full of drama, I suppose. I'm not really sure. Anyway, just read and review, the reviews will make me update faster, if people are still reading this. Are you?

Enjoy

* * *

"I don't want you to go." Addison hugged Derek tighter.

"I know. I don't want to leave you." He hugged her back, feeling her stomach press into his. "Before you know it I'll be home though, and I'll call you okay, and you can call me whenever you want to." He placed a kiss on her hair.

"Okay, call me when you get there." Her voice was muffled by his coat.

"I will, now you better get inside before you catch a cold." He smiled and pulled back, smiling at her red nose. "Your nose is already cold." He pulled his coat tighter around him to keep out the cold November air. "Go in." He urged.

"I'm fine."

"No, in, I won't have my seven month pregnant girlfriend stood outside with no coat in winter, now in."

Addison pouted but moved back inside.

"I'll call when we get there." He lent forward and kissed her on the lips. "Take care of both of you." He smiled and dropped to his knees, kissing her bump. "Daddy will miss you, so be good for mommy while I'm gone." Derek smiled and kissed her bump again, brushing his hand over it before standing up and kissing Addison again. "I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you too, Der." She looked up at him.

"It's only ten days. I'll be back before you know it."

"I know, have fun with your gran."

"Thanks," He smiled and kissed her again. "Take care." Derek turned and headed down the steps to the car where his mother and sisters were waiting. "Go inside, Addi." He called as he opened the car door, making her roll her eyes but wave and shut the front door, walking back inside. She rubbed her bump as she walked into the kitchen and got herself a drink. Addison didn't want Derek to go away, but his family was going to visit his gran, and she couldn't say no when he asked if she would mine if he went. It was only ten days anyway; she could survive that long without him.

---

Addison sat down on the small couch in Nicola's living room. She had tried moving back in with her dad a few times but they had always ended up arguing badly and she had always ended up back at Nicola's. Nicola and Jamie had accepted her as part of the family and they had even helped her set up a nursery for the baby in the house. She had been helping Nicola plan the wedding, leaving Derek and Jamie to bond.

-

Derek had only been gone for four days but Addison missed him badly, she'd just want to snuggle up next to him on the couch when she felt fed up and moody. She just wanted him to be there with her, to calm the baby down when all they did was kick. She sighed and lent back against the cushions, positioning herself so she was comfortable and her hands rested on her bump. Addison felt the baby move and moved her hands to where they lay and she smiled, rubbing gently. Softly she began to talk, smiling the whole time.

---

Jamie mumbled slightly and pulled Nicola slightly as he heard the bedroom door open. He opened one eye slightly and frowned when he saw Addison stood there. "What's wrong?" He asked sleepily.

Addison bit her lip, a hand on her bump. "I think I'm in labour."

"What?" He sat up straight. "But you're only seven months!"

"Hmm, what's going on?" Nicola rolled over groggily.

"She's in labour." Jamie got out of bed and began to pull clothes on.

"What?" Nicola sat up as well, before quickly rushing to Addison who winced in pain as a contraction hit her. "Okay, we'll get you to the hospital, everything will be okay." She reassured Addison.

"It's too soon, something's wrong, what if I lose my baby?" Her eyes widened at the thought, tears starting to gather.

"Don't think like that, you are not going to lose your baby."

"Come on. Let's get you into the car." Jamie took hold of one of Addison's arms and began to gently lead her down the stairs and out to the car.

Ten minutes later and they arrived at the hospital, Addison being taken into a room immediately. Nicola went with her for support, telling Jamie to ring Derek. Addison lay in a bed and gripped Nicola's hand tightly as the doctors examined her.

"You're in labour, this baby is coming today." The doctor stood up looking at Addison.

"No! It's too early! They can't be coming now they can't!" She began to sob. "I want Derek, I want Derek here."

"Jay's ringing him, he'll get here, don't worry." Nicola tried to calm her down.

-

Jamie paced back and forth as he finished his phone call with Derek. Derek was going to do everything he could to get back to Addison. He was going to be there for her, he had promised. Jamie hung up and continued to pace. He had no idea what was going on in there, he just watched as nurses moved in and out of Addison's room, no one would tell him anything because he wasn't family. He sighed and wondered if her parents should be called, but then he shook the thought from his mind, knowing it wasn't what she needed.

-

"I'm sorry ma'am but you're going to have to leave, you're not family." The nurse addressed Nicola.

"No! She is not leaving!" Addison gripped Nicola's hand tighter.

"She's not family, she's not meant to be in here."

"She's like my family! She IS family to me, and she's not leaving."

The nurse looked at the determined look in Addison's eyes before she cried out from another contraction. "Okay, she can stay then." She nodded before moving back to the doctor, listening to her instructions.

"Is Derek coming?" Addison looked up at Nicola scared.

"Jay's rang him, I'm sure he's on his way."

Addison just nodded her head and tightened her grip.

----

"Okay now I want you to push on your next contraction, Addison." The doctor looked up at her.

"No." She shook her head. "Derek's not here, he has to be here." Tears rolled down her cheeks.

"This baby needs to come out now. We don't have any time to wait."

"No, I want him here, please." She sobbed.

"Addison, look at me, look at me, Addison."

Addison turned and looked at Nicola.

"You need to do this for your baby. I know Derek would be here if he could make it, but he's trying his best to get here, but you can't wait, you have to do this now okay? I'll be here the whole time, you won't be alone, and Derek will be here later okay?"

Addison just nodded.

"Good."

"Right, let's have this baby then." The doctor smiled as Addison prepared herself to push. As the next contraction hit her, she began to push, gripping Nicola's hand tightly. "That's good, keep pushing, the head's nearly out." The doctor concentrated on the baby. "Head's out! Stop pushing now, just pant for me okay, encourage her." She motioned to Nicola who encouraged Addison. "Okay right on the next contraction, give me a big push."

Addison began pushing again, concentrating on just that, before she felt a hand grasp hers and a chest press against her back, soothing words being whispered into her ear. "Derek." She gasped as she felt her baby slide from her body, and a loud cry fill the room.

"I'm here." He whispered, kissing her cheek.

"Congratulations, it's a girl." The doctor smiled and held up a tiny baby, before passing her to some nurses who immediately put her into an incubator and left the room with her.

"Where…where are you taking her?" Addison looked at the doctor.

"She's going to the NICU. They'll clean her up and run a few tests to make sure she's healthy. She'll need to stay in an incubator for a while; she's very small and needs to develop more."

"When can I see her?"

"A little later, one of the nurses will take you to go see her."

Addison just nodded numbly, leaning back into Derek who kissed her hair and ran his hand up and down her arm.

---

Addison looked down at the tiny baby in the incubator, she had tape over her eyes and she was hooked up to many monitors. Carefully she placed her hand through the hole on the side and took hold of her daughter's hand.

"Welcome to the world Jessica Samantha Montgomery." Addison felt tears sting her eyes as she looked at her daughter.

"She looks like you, you know." Derek stood behind her, a hand on the small of her back, putting his hand through the other hole, softly stroking Jessica's stomach. "She's got your red hair," He smiled.

"Yeah." Addison agreed and smiled slightly. "She's so small."

"She'll grow, won't you, Jessie? You'll grow for mommy and me. You'll grow and be a big strong girl." He smiled as he watched her turn her head to face them. "Look, she knows our voices."

"Yeah." Addison smiled and gazed at her daughter.

"I should ring my mom." He whispered and placed a kiss on Addison's hair.

"Okay." She nodded.

"Are you going to call your parents?"

"They don't deserve to know."

"Okay." He nodded, respecting her decision. "I'll be back as quick as I can." He pecked her cheek and left the nursery, pulling out his cell phone.

-----

"It's a girl!" Kathryn announced to her daughters. "Jessica Samantha Montgomery." She smiled.

"A girl!" They squealed with delight and started chatting amongst themselves.

"So you have yourself a granddaughter?" Victoria smiled at her daughter.

"I do." Kathryn grinned. "I can't wait to meet her."

"Well, I want to meet my great granddaughter."

"You will mom, but right now, she's in an incubator, I don't know if I'll even be allowed to see her."

"Don't worry, she'll get better, she's a fighter, I know she is." Victoria smiled. "Now, why don't you and the girls get yourselves ready to go home, so you can see Jessica?"

"Okay, thanks mom." Kathryn smiled and hugged her mother, calling to the girls.

----

"She looks a lot like Addi." Nicola smiled and leaned back into Jamie. They were stood outside the NICU and were watching Addison stood next to her daughter's incubator. They had left her alone to spend some time with Jessica. "They don't deserve to have to go through this."

"I know. No one does." Jamie placed a kiss behind her ear. "But they'll get through this together. Jessica's a little fighter, I can see it."

"She has amazing parents who love her so much."

"She does." They stood in silence for a while, just watching Addison.

"Maybe we should wait." Jamie whispered.

"What?"

"To have a baby, let's wait a while, until after the wedding and all, right now Addi is going to need us, she's going to need you, let's wait a little while longer for a baby."

"Yeah." Nicola nodded. "Okay."


	26. Chapter 26

A/N:Okay, sorry I haven't updated this one in a while, but I just don't want it to end and there's only three chapters after this one! This has been written for months now, I jsut don't want it to end on here :( Anyway, this is just basically fluff in this chapter, I love near the end. :D

Enjoy

* * *

A few days later and Addison sat in a chair next to Jessica's incubator, letting Jessica grip hold of her finger tightly. She had gotten a little stronger in the past few days, but they still had a long way to go. Addison watched her daughter move her legs and turn her head.

"Hey Jess." Addison smiled. "Are you growing for mommy and daddy? You need to grow for us so we can take you home." Gently she ran a finger over Jessica's nose. "Your gran and your four aunties will be in later to see you, they will, and they all want to spoil you rotten."

Jessica just turned her head towards her mother and tightened her grip making Addison just smile widely at her daughter.

"Hey." Derek smiled as he walked into the NICU.

"Hey." Addison smiled up at him as he kissed her cheek.

"How are you both today?"

"We're good, we're getting there aren't we, Jess?"

"Good." He smiled. "Hey Jessie." He placed his hand through the other hole and stroked her stomach. "Did you miss daddy?"

"I think she did, I know I missed you."

"I missed you both as well, but I brought some people with me." He smiled and turned to look as his mother and grandmother walked in. "Addi, this is my gran. Gran, this is my girlfriend Addi, and our daughter Jessica." Derek smiled proudly as Kathryn and Victoria peered into the incubator.

"She's gorgeous, Derek. She's absolutely stunning, they both are," Victoria smiled at her grandson. "You have a wonderful family here with these two."

"Thanks gran." He smiled back at her.

"She looks just like you, Addi." Kathryn smiled at Addison before looking back at Jessica. "She's a little fighter."

"She is, just like her mother." Derek grinned and placed a kiss on Addison's hair who just smiled and watched her daughter.

----

Addison smiled and accepted the sandwich that Derek offered her. He had insisted that she went with him to the canteen and got food, while his mother and grandmother stayed with Jessica.

"I don't like leaving her." Addison looked up at Derek.

"She's fine with my mom and Gran." He smiled at her. She was already proving to be a brilliant mother for Jessica.

"I know, I just miss her, I've gotten use to her being around."

"You're never going to put her down are you?" He looked at her amused and she blushed slightly. "I don't blame you. I never want to let you two go."

"You'll never lose us." She smiled at him before leaning forward and kissing him on the lips, resting a hand on his cheek.

"Good, I hope not." Derek smiled, leaning in to her touch, bringing a hand around her waist. Addison grinned and carried on kissing him. He brought his hand up to her head, tangling it in her hair as he kissed her back, his other hand pressed against the small of her back.

"I think people are looking." She mumbled but never broke the kiss.

"So what?" Derek grinned, pressing their bodies closer. Addison smiled and wrapped her arms round his neck. "I think some of the kids here are too young for this."

"Hmm, no one is asking them to look." She giggled.

"They look anyway."

"They do." She smiled at him and pulled away slightly.

"We should carry this on later," Derek smiled, cursing the fact that they were in the hospital canteen.

"Yeah, we should get back to Jess."

"Yeah, we should." Derek linked their hands as Addison smiled and leaned into him. Derek rested his shoulder on her head for a moment, inhaling the scent of her hair that he loved so much. She just smiled happily and was content to walk along side him. "Hey, Add? I have something I want to tell you." Derek tightened his grip nervously.

"What is it?" She looked up at him, placing a hand on his chest as they walked. Derek looked around, pulling Addison into an empty room. "What's wrong?" She looked at him confused.

Derek simply smiled, holding her shoulders. He looked into her eyes, the worry and expectation evident. He placed a sweet kiss on her lips, resting his forehead on hers. "I love you." He whispered, his hands moving down her arms to link their fingers once more. Addison gasped and looked up into his eyes, hers wide. "I love you, Addison." Derek whispered again, searching her eyes.

"You…you love me?" She asked him shocked.

"Yeah, yeah I do." Derek smiled.

"No…no one has ever said that to me before." She felt the tears gather in her eyes.

"I have no idea why." Derek whispered, taking her in his arms. Tears softly made their way down her cheeks. Kissing the top of her head, Derek held her tighter.

"Derek?"

"Yeah?"

"I…I don't want to hurt you, but I don't think I can tell you that I love you."

"I know, I don't expect you to, you've been through too much to take that step so soon."

She just nodded and looked up at him.

Derek smiled, cupping her cheek. "I'm not going to push you into anything."

"Okay." She smiled and leaned up, kissing him softly on the lips. Derek grinned, holding her close. Slowly Addison pulled back and just looked into his eyes. "Thank you, Derek." She smiled and kissed him again.

"Just take your time okay, Addi."

She nodded at him and he took hold of her hand, walking back towards the NICU.

------

"She's so tiny!" Nancy's eyes widened as she looked at her niece.

"She looks like Addi though." Kathleen placed her hands against the incubator.

"That's a good thing. She doesn't want to look like Der." Emily giggled.

"That's so mean, Em." Beth laughed as well.

"Look, she's looking at us!" Nancy looked at Jessica in awe as she turned her head towards the chatter.

"She's a lot like Addi." The girls just stood and watched Jessica.

Derek smiled as he stood outside the NICU, watching his sisters inside with Jessica. He couldn't wait to take her home. He just wanted to show his little girl off.

"What does it feel like to be a father then?" Jamie stood next to Derek, looking into the NICU as well.

"It's amazing, I can't describe it really. I just want to protect her. I want to show her off. I want everyone to know that she's mine." He smiled widely.

"You will do soon." Jamie smiled. "I can't wait to have kids of my own, but we're going to wait, Addi is going to need help with Jessica, so we'll wait a while."

"You don't have to do that."

"We want to." Jamie smiled.

"Okay." Derek smiled as well and continued to watch the girls.

-----

A month later and Addison watched as the nurses removed the tape from her daughter's eyes, and Jessica look around her and blinked.

"Hey baby." Addison smiled down at her and took hold of her hand. Jessica turned her head and blinked up at her mother. "Hey Jess, I'm your mommy." She smiled widely.

"Hey." Derek smiled as he walked into the NICU. "Hey Jessie." He grinned as he saw the little girl look at him and gurgle slightly. "How are you today?" He cooed at the little girl, making Addison laugh softly.

"You know she can't answer you right? She's only a month old."

"I know that." He stuck his tongue out at her and Addison just laughed some more. "Nikki will be in later, she hasn't got any lessons this afternoon so she'll come in then."

"Haven't you got lessons today?"

"No."

"Derek, you really should go back to school."

"No, I want to be here with you two." He smiled and pecked her cheek. "How is she today?"

"She's doing good." Addison smiled widely.

"Good." Derek smiled as well and put his hand through the other hole.

A nurse walked towards them. "If you want you can try feeding her." She smiled at Addison. "The skin to skin contact will help her."

"Really?" Addison's eyes widened.

"Yes."

"I do." She grinned and watched as the nurse carefully untangled Jessica from the wires.

"If you sit down in the chair over there."

Addison sat down in the chair and the nurse placed Jessica in her arms. "She's tiny." Tears sprang to Addison's eyes as she held her daughter for the first time.

"Nursing her should make her gain weight." The nurse smiled. "Do you know how to feed her?"

Addison shook her head.

"Okay, pull your top up to show your breast and move her head towards your nipple."

Addison did as the nurse said and watched as Jessica instantly turned her head towards her breast and began suckling happily. Addison gasped and Derek shifted uncomfortably.

"I'll leave you to it now. If you have any problems just give me a shout." He nurse smiled and left.

"Erm, do you want me to leave as well?" Derek looked at Addison.

"No, no stay," She smiled up at him.

"But you're…I can see your…"

"It doesn't matter." She smiled at him and he walked towards her. Jessica gazed up at them as she suckled happily, one hand resting against Addison's breast. "I can't believe I'm actually holding her."

"It's amazing." He ran his finger over Jessica's cheek and they just watched her silently as she continued to suckle.

Once Jessica stopped suckling the nurse entered the NICU again. "Does daddy want to burp her?" She looked at Derek who just nodded. "Okay, just rub her back." Derek took Jessica from Addison and rubbed her back, making her burp slightly and Derek smiled down at her. "If you want to hold her for a bit longer, hold her against your bare skin."

"Bare skin?" Addison looked at the nurse.

"Yes, the heat from your body will help her, so you can take your top off, lay her against your chest and wrap your jacket around yourself."

"Oh okay,"

"Erm I'll just leave if you want me to?" Derek shifted again.

"It's fine, Der," Addison smiled at him before discreetly taking her top off and taking Jessica back into her arms, laying her against her chest and wrapping her jacket around them. She smiled and placed a kiss on her daughter's head, holding her close. Addison could feel Jessica's even breathing against her chest and she felt her daughter move slightly to get comfortable.

"She looks quite cosy." The nurse smiled. "Just give us a shout if you need anything, she won't be able to stay out for too long, but this will help her." Once again they were left alone. Derek was just stood there looking at Addison wide eyed, he had imagine what her body looked like, but it had never been as good as it was.

"What?" She caught his expression.

"Nothing, it's just that, I mean, your body is better than I imagined." He watched as her cheeks blushed a deep red. "Sorry I didn't mean to look."

"It's okay." She smiled at him and looked back down at Jessica who was making baby noises. "I can't wait to take you home, baby." Addison placed a gentle kiss on her daughter's head. Derek smiled as he watched them.


	27. Chapter 27

A/N: There's only two chapters left after this one. :( I don't want to finish updating this fic, even thought I finsihed writing it agesssssssss ago. Anyway, I'm sure this chapter will make all of you happy. :D

Enjoy

* * *

Every day Addison would feed her little girl and hold her close to her chest, and Jessica thrived from it. She gained the right amount of weight; she grew into a healthy little baby and was finally allowed to go home. It was Christmas Eve when Addison and Derek took their little girl home.

"Welcome home, baby." Addison smiled widely as she carried Jessica into the house. Nicola smiled as she walked into the hallway, seeing the happiness on both Addison and Derek's faces.

"The nursery is all finished if you want to take her on up to there."

"Thanks." Addison smiled and they headed up the stairs. They walked into the nursery and looked around, it was perfect.

"She's finally home."

"She is." Addison grinned. "I can't believe our little girl is finally home."

"I know, it feels so unreal." Derek beamed.

"Are you staying tonight?"

"Try and stop me."

"Good." Addison smiled and kissed him on the lips and he softly kissed her back, pulling away when Jessica gurgled up at them. They smiled down at her before showing her the nursery.

---

"The house isn't going to be very quiet from now on is it?" Jamie wrapped his arms around Nicola's waist as she stood in the kitchen.

"No." She smiled. "But it'll be nice." She turned in his arms and wrapped her arms around his neck.

"That it will." He smiled as well and pecked her lips. "I can't wait to have our own."

"I know. I can't wait either."

"We will soon enough."

----

Addison sat in the bath later that day with Jessica leaning against her legs. Addison cooed and baby-talked to her daughter, making her gurgle loudly and splash the water slightly.

"Are you enjoying our little bath, Jess?" Addison smiled widely and placed a kiss on her daughter's head when the bathroom door opened and Derek walked in.

"Oh, sorry, I didn't know you were in the bath." He looked at them and Addison just looked back. "You have Jessie as well." He smiled and walked closer, kissing Jessica on the forehead.

"We're enjoying a little bath together."

"And no one invited me." He pouted. "Well shift forward."

"What?" She looked at him confused.

"Move forward." He began to get undressed. "Move forward." He repeated and she did, as he slid in behind her and pulled her to lean against his chest. "Now this is better." He smiled at Jessica over Addison's shoulder and they enjoyed their bath together.

Once they had finished Derek got out first and wrapped a towel around his waist, before holding out a towel for Addison as she stepped out and wrapped it around her and Jessica. Addison smiled at him before pecking his lips. Jessica gave a small yawn and nestled her head against Addison.

"Someone's tired."

"We should put her to bed." Addison swayed her daughter.

"Yeah." Derek got a smaller towel and took Jessica from Addison, wrapping her in the towel. "Let's go put you to bed, Jessie."

Derek smiled at Addison before leaving the bathroom and walking into the nursery. Addison followed and watched as Derek dried and then dressed Jessica ready for bed. Jessica looked up at Derek and nestled her head into his neck when he picked her up. "Someone is going to love cuddles." He smiled and turned to Addison.

"She already does." Addison walked forward and placed a kiss on Jessica's forehead before Derek swayed her softly to get her to sleep. It wasn't long before she was sleeping peacefully and Derek placed her in her crib gently and they walked back to Addison's bedroom.

"Hey Derek." She turned to face him after he closed the door.

"Yeah?"

"I love you, Derek, I really love you." She smiled softly and watched as his expression went from shocked to overjoyed.

"I love you so much, Addi." He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her softly, holding her close.

"Derek?"

"Yeah?" Derek looked at her expectantly, lacing their fingers together.

"Will…will you make love to me?" She looked up into his eyes.

A smile spread over his face as he leant down to kiss her, not needing to speak out loud. She smiled and kissed him back, letting him lead her to the bed. Derek smiled into the kiss, his hands holding her hips. Slowly her hands moved down his body to unwrap the towel from his hips. Derek grasped her towel, hesitating slightly, looking at Addison to make sure this was what she really wanted. She nodded and kissed him again, pressing her body against his. Derek smiled, removing her towel, running his hands down her body. She felt a tingle run through her body at his touch and she shivered slightly.

"You're beautiful." Derek whispered, placing butterfly kisses on her neck. Addison blushed slightly and led back on the bed, pulling him with her. Derek placed his hand on her back, letting them fall onto the bed.

She smiled up at him and ran a finger over his cheek. "What about a condom?"

Derek stopped abruptly, looking sheepish. "I didn't know this was going to happen," He bit his lip apologetically, looking worried.

"Oh…Nikki and Jamie must have some…right?"

Derek nodded. "Yeah, they might. Do you want me to go look for some?"

"Yeah." She nodded.

"I'll be right back." Derek got off the bed, wrapped the towel back around him and went to search for a condom. Addison lay back on the bed and waited for him, a smile playing on her lips.

"Got one." Derek smiled, getting back on the bed, slipping it on as he got closer to Addison.

"Good." She smiled and kissed him again. Derek's hands roamed her body as they kissed, stopping at her hips. She moved beneath him, making herself comfortable. Derek kissed her softly, one hand tangling in her hair, the other moving to her thigh.

"I'm ready, Derek." She whispered.

He broke away slightly, looking at her. "I love you." He whispered, placing himself in front of her entrance.

"I love you too." She kissed him gently. Derek smiled, moving into her carefully. Addison wrapped a leg around his waist and bit her lip lightly.

"Am I hurting you?" Derek noticed, looking worried.

"No." She shook her head. "It's just, it feels weird."

"Weird?"

"Yeah, I mean, with Steve, it was always rough and hurt, but with you, it's slow and gentle, I just wasn't expecting it to not hurt."

"I'll never hurt you." Derek smiled softly, kissing her gently as he moved inside of her.

"I know." Addison wrapped her other leg around him, feeling him inside her. Derek moaned slightly as he filled her completely, feeling her around him. Her hands gripped his shoulders and she closed her eyes. He moved faster, but gentle with his motions. He deepened the kiss, his hands holding her hips. She gasped slightly and let her head drop back. He lightly skimmed her skin with his lips, low moans escaping from the back of his throat. Her back arched up into him, her hands moving over his back. He thrust deeper into her, filling her completely as he held her closer.

Soft moans passed her lips and she kissed his shoulder, moving her legs higher. Derek moaned, feeling himself come close to orgasm, thrusting slightly faster as not to hurt her. Addison felt her muscle clench around him and her head become fuzzy. Derek gasped out her name, feeling himself come nearer, waiting for her to come first. It took a few more thrusts before she moaned his name in pleasure, her orgasm washing over her body. He called her name out, coming at the same time as her. Breathing heavily Addison came down from her high and looked up at him.

Derek looked back at her, a soft smile on his lips. "I love you."

"I love you too." She kissed him softly. "Thank you."

Derek's brow furrowed. "For what?"

"For making love to me." She smiled up at him.

"You don't need to thank me for that." Derek smiled, leaning down to kiss her softly.

"But I do." She kissed him back. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"Am I your first?"

"Yeah." He smiled. "You are."

Addison smiled sadly. "I wish you were my first." She whispered.

"In a way, I am."

"Yeah." She nodded. "You are, but I wanted you to take my virginity, not him."

"Well, blur out the past, concentrate on now, keep thinking that we just had mind blowing sex for the first time together." Derek smiled.

"Okay." She grinned and kissed him again. "I love you, Derek."

"I love you more." Derek smirked against her lips.

Addison giggled. "I don't think you do."

"Hmmm, I think I do." Derek grinned, kissing her neck.

"No." She moved her head and kissed him on the lips again as a little cry filled the room. Derek reluctantly broke away from the kiss as he sat up slightly. "I think someone's awake." She sighed.

"What time is it?"

"Nearly seven, she's not used to being on her own."

Derek sat up further, covering himself with the bed sheets as he looked at Addison.

"I'll go." She got out of bed and pulled his t-shirt and a pair of shorts on. Derek smirked as he also got out of bed, the sheets wrapped firmly around his waist. Addison made her way across the landing and into nursery. Derek followed, keeping the sheets tight against his body. Gently Addison picked her daughter up and cradled her against her body.

"Shh, Jess, it's okay, we're here, don't cry sweetie." She placed a kiss on her daughter's forehead. Derek stood behind Addison, wrapping his arms around both her and Jess. Addison grinned as Jess nestled into her neck once again. "Think we can take her back in with us? I don't want to put her back down." Addison softly swayed her daughter and kissed her hair. Derek smiled widely, watching his family, his hands resting on Addison's waist. "Do you want to come back to bed with mommy and Daddy, Jess?" Derek laughed softly as Jess yawned, stretching in Addison's arms. Addison smiled as well and started to make her way back to her bedroom. Derek followed, shutting the door to the nursery behind him. "You know I never want to let her go." Addison sat down on the bed.

"I know." Derek smiled, standing in front of them, his hands resting on her arms. Addison smiled up at him and kissed Jessica on her forehead. "I love you both." Derek whispered, sitting beside Addison.

"And we love you."

"Is it possible to be so happy that I could burst?"

"Yes." Addison grinned. "It is."

"Good." Derek leaned over and placed a soft kiss on Addison's lips.

"Jess coming home is the best Christmas present I could ask for."

"I know." Derek kissed the top of Jessica's forehead, leaning back into the headboard. Addison leaned back as well so Jessica led on her chest, sleeping soundly. Derek raised an eyebrow. "How are you going to get comfortable enough to sleep?"

"I thought I'd watch her for a while."

Derek brought an arm around her, bringing them closer to him. Addison smiled up at him and let her head rest on his chest. "I can't believe she's mine, that I gave birth to her."

"It is pretty amazing." Derek agreed, lightly playing with her fingers.

"I'm so glad you're here with us."

"And I'm glad I'm with you guys." Derek grinned.

Addison smiled widely and kissed his hand. "I want us to always be together, I want us to stay a family."

"We will, we'll always be a family." Derek kissed her hair and looked down at Jessica who was fast sleep.

"I love you, Der." she grinned.

"I love you too, Addi." He kissed her forehead and they fell into a comfortable silence.


	28. Chapter 28

A/N: Sorry this has taken ages to update, but exams took over. There is only one chapter left now. It's so sad. I don't want this fic to end. :(

Enjoy

* * *

The next day Addison awoke slowly and blinked a few times, adjusting to the light. She gave a small yawn and stretched before curling into Derek's side again.

"Morning sleepy head." He smiled and kissed her hair, smiling.

"Morning." She smiled and kissed Jessica's forehead, who was fast asleep on Derek's chest.

"She sleeps well."

"She does, it's good." Addison grinned and looked up at him.

"Merry Christmas, Ads." He pecked her lips.

"Merry Christmas, Der, merry Christmas, Jess." Addison kissed her daughter who slowly began to stir and blinked at her mother who cooed at her before picking her up for a hug. "We should go down and open our presents."

"Yeah." Derek smiled and sat up before getting out of bed and following Addison down the stairs.

"Morning." Nicola smiled at them and cooed at Jessica. "How did she sleep last night? I only heard her cry once." Nicola took Jessica from Addison and gave her a cuddle.

"She woke up about four times I think it was, once because she woke up and was alone so we took her in with us, and the others it was for food." Addison smiled and leaned back into Derek.

"That's good." Nicola smiled and tickled Jessica slightly who gurgled and reached for Nicola's hair. "Are you ready to open your presents, little one?"

"I know I am." Jamie smiled at them as he walked out from the kitchen. "Let's go and open them." Nicola handed Jessica back to her mother and they walked into the living room, sitting down on the floor around the Christmas tree. "Right." Jamie started handing presents out to people and Addison handed Jess to him as she opened a present.

"Hey, Jess, look at this," Addison smiled and held up a stuffed pink rabbit that Nicola and Jamie had bought her. "What do you think huh?" Jessica looked at it and blinked before reaching forward, grabbing an ear with her hands and taking it from her mother. "I think she likes it."

"Yeah, she does." They all grinned as they watched her.

-

By eleven o'clock all the presents had been opened and everyone was dressed and ready.

"Sorry that we can't stay here and have Christmas dinner with you but we always go to my parents on Christmas day and Jamie's on Boxing Day."

"It's fine, Nikki, honestly. We're going to Derek's anyway, spend some time with his family as well." Addison smiled.

"Okay, have a good time and look after little Jess here." Nicola smiled at the little baby who was strapped to Addison's front.

"Oh we will." Addison grinned and Derek helped her put her coat on before she put on a hat and scarf, zipping up her coat so Jessica was nice and warm against her chest. "We'll see you when you come back, have fun." Addison and Derek said goodbye before they left the house and made their way towards Derek's.

"Hmm, she looks cosy there." Derek smiled as he looked at Jessica all snuggled up against her mother and wrapped his arm tighter around Addison's waist.

"She is. It's nice to have her close."

"You're not going to use the buggy until she's older are you?" He grinned and Addison blushed before shaking her head. "It's okay, I don't blame you."

It didn't take them long before they arrived at his house. He opened the door and let Addison walk in first. He shut the door behind them and helped Addison take off her coat before taking off his own. "Your nose is red." He smiled and kissed her nose, making her giggle.

"Derek! Addi! Jess!!!" Emily and Beth came running down the stairs and towards their brother before hugging him and Addison before turning their attention to Jessica who blinked at them. "Can we hold her, pleaseeeeeee?"

Derek laughed at their enthusiasm. "I doubt you'll get to hold her yet."

"Why not?"

"Because Ads isn't going to give her up easily, you'll have to wait a while."

Addison smiled and placed a kiss on her daughter's head as they moved into the living room.

-

Twenty minutes later, everyone was sat around the tree and opening their presents. Jessica was snuggled up in Addison's arms as she lent back against the chair.

Derek smiled as he opened a present for Jessica from his sisters. "Hmm, what do you think of that, Jessie, huh?" Derek held up the pink baby blanket with Jessica written across it.

"Thank you, girls, it's so sweet." Addison smiled and shifted Jessica slightly so Derek could wrap her up in it.

-

By ten to twelve every present had been opened and they were happy with what they had been given. "Hey there's one more." Emily reached into the tree and pulled out the wrapped box. "It's for Addi and Jess." She held the box out towards Addison who took it with one hand.

"Here, give me Jessie." Derek held his arms out for Jessica who snuggled up in his arms once Addison had carefully placed her there. Very carefully she began to open the box, gasping when she saw what was inside and tears glistened in her eyes.

"What is it?"

With shaky hands Addison removed the two lockets from inside the box and held them up for everyone to see.

"There's something written on the back."

Addison turned them over and read the inscription, the first one read:

_To Addison, you are an amazing person who I am so glad to have met and fallen in love with. Our family means everything to me. I love you, Derek xxx_.

Tears rolled down her cheeks as she read the second one.

_To Jessie, my gorgeous little girl. You are a fighter and are going to break some hearts when you are older. I love you baby, Daddy xxx._

Addison looked up at Derek with tears flowing freely.

"Open them up." Derek urged and watched her expression as she did. Addison's locket had two pictures of Jessica and a lock of her hair, while Jessica's locker held a photo of Addison smiling widely, looking beautiful, and a photo of herself.

"Thank you, Derek." Addison looked up at him. "They're perfect, they really are." She lent up and placed a gentle kiss on his lips.

"I'm glad you like them." He smiled softly at her. "Em, take Jessie for me, and I'll help Addi put her locket on." He handed their daughter to Emily and turned to Addison, putting her locket around her neck.

"It's beautiful." Addison smiled at him and kissed him again.

"Jessie can wear hers when she's a bit older."

"Yeah." Addison nodded and looked at her daughter sleeping peacefully in her youngest aunt's arms. Everything was going to be okay.


	29. Chapter 29

A/N; Finally! Sorry, I've been having some problems trying to update. It seems that my usb modem doesn't want me to update, and seeing as I've been on that recently and not the wireless, it's been hard to update, but I'm updating now!! I'm so sorry for the wait. This is the final chapter now. It's over. There will be no more. Now I'm sad. I love this fic. Please leave me a review and tell me what you think. They are appreciated so much.

Enjoy for the last time!!

* * *

_One year later_

"Shh." Derek tried to quieten an excited Jessica who grinned and clapped her hands happily. "You'll wake everyone up."

"Yes!" She giggled and looked at him. Yes was her first word much to her parent's disappointment when they wanted it to be mommy or daddy. "Yes!" Jessica bounced in her cot and held her arms out for her father who chuckled and picked her up.

"Let's go see mommy then."

Jessica grinned widely and nestled her head against her father's chest. As she had grown she had become more of a cuddly person, and would snuggle up with her parents, or any of her family at any chance she got. Derek carried her back to the room that had become Addison's over the past year and a half in Nicola's house and Jessica squealed with delight at seeing her mother.

Addison stirred and slowly opened her eyes, blinking a few times before smiling, holding her arms out for her thirteen month old daughter as Derek neared the bed. Jessica snuggled down under the covers with her mother who pulled her close and placed a kiss on the top of her head.

"Good morning, baby." Addison cuddled Jessica.

Derek climbed back into bed and pulled his girls close. "Think she'll sleep again now?"

"Hmm, I hope so." Addison smiled and kissed Derek on the lips before closing her eyes again. Derek grinned and kissed Jessica on the head as well before she yawned and closed her eyes.

----

They all laughed as Jessica sat throwing the wrapping paper over her. She giggled and clapped her hands excitedly, more interested in the wrapping paper then her actual presents. Derek got the video camera out and videoed her, wanting to capture it forever.

While Addison and Derek were wrapped up in Jessica, Nicola pulled out another present she had been hiding and pushed it into her husband's hands. When Jessica was about six months old, Nicola and Jamie got married. Addison had been a bridesmaid and the wedding was beautiful. Nicola and Jamie couldn't be happier and looked at Derek, Addison and Jessica as family.

"What's this?" Jamie looked at the present before back at his wife.

"Just open it." She smiled and urged. Carefully he began to pull the wrapping paper off, opening the box to reveal a white stick in there. His eyes widened and he just stared at it, before looking up at Nicola. "Is…is it true?"

She just grinned and nodded. "Yes, I'm pregnant."

Jamie grinned and kissed her, pulling her close before resting a hand on her stomach.

They pulled back and Jamie turned to Addison and Derek. "Did you hear that? I'm going to be a daddy!" He wore a stupid grin and held his wife close, his hand resting where their baby lay.

"Congratulations, Nikki." Addison smiled and hugged her friend while Derek congratulated Jamie.

"I can't believe it. I didn't think it would happen so fast." Nicola smiled widely.

"It's amazing. You'll be a great mom." Addison smiled at her friend, happy for her

"Thanks, Ads."

---

Nicola grinned and tickled Jessica's sides making the little girl squeal with laughter and wriggle on the couch. Jamie smiled and watched from the doorway, not being able to wait to hold his baby. Addison came down the stairs with a bag and placed it on the floor by the front door and walked into the living room.

"Come on, Jess, say bye-bye to Auntie Nikki." Addison smiled as Jessica hugged Nicola and gave her a little kiss, something she had picked up lately. Addison held her arms out for her daughter and placed her on her hip and walked towards the buggy, before securely strapping Jessica in.

Jamie pulled his wife close as Derek pushed the buggy out of the door and Addison linked her arm through his, waving at Nicola and Jamie as they walked down the street towards Derek's.

"I can't wait until we can hold our baby." Jamie grinned down at Nicola and pecked her lips quickly. "How far are you?"

"I think I'm about two months, I need to check with a doctor first."

"Okay, I want to be there, I want to be there for all of it."

"Good, because I wasn't planning on having you anywhere else." Nicola grinned and kissed him again.

---

"Jess! Jess!" Emily grinned and watched as her niece toddled over to her on shaky legs. Jessica was still getting the hang of walking. "Yay!" Emily pulled her into her arms and hugged her close. "You're getting good at that you know."

Derek smiled and watched from the doorway, he loved watching his sisters and Addison with Jessica, it just made him grin widely. He felt two arms snake around his waist and a kiss was dropped on his shoulder. Derek turned and wrapped his arms around Addison.

"Hey, babe." He kissed her forehead.

"Jess with Emily?"

"Yeah. Em's amused at her walking skill." He smiled.

"Okay," Addison looked up at him and smiled. "Why don't we go upstairs for a while?" She suggested.

"And what do you suggest we do up there?" Derek grinned and they walked towards the stairs.

"I can think of a lot of things." She smiled and ran up the stairs to Derek's room, him close behind.

----

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Derek looked at Addison as they walked down the street.

"Yes, I'm sure. I said we'd go see them. We're not staying long, and we can leave if we want to." She shifted Jessica on her hip slightly and watched as she reached her tiny hands out trying to catch the snow that was falling.

"Okay." He nodded reluctantly and they carried on walking towards Addison's father's house, where they were going to have dinner with both her parents.

They reached the house and knocked on the door, it being opened shortly with Peter stood there. He smiled and let them walk into the hallway.

"It's good to see you, Ads."

Addison smiled at her father. "It's good to see you too. Where's mom?"

"I'm here." Joanna appeared and smiled at her daughter. "This is Jessica?"

It had taken a few months after Jessica was born for Joanna to realise that she hadn't treated Addison the best and she wanted to make up for it. But Addison had wanted nothing to do with her and they didn't talk for months, even though Joanna kept trying. Addison had ignored her parents until just after Nicola and Jamie had gotten married. She had spoken and saw them briefly in the street, but they hadn't spent longer than ten minutes with each other or talking, so it was a big step for them to have dinner together.

"Yes,. Addison smiled proudly and nodded while Derek stood behind her with a hand on her lower back protectively. "Our little pride and joy." She kissed Jessica's forehead.

"She's beautiful. She looks a lot like you." Joanna smiled at Jessica who buried her head into her mother's shoulder.

"Yeah, you made the right choice, Ads." Peter gazed at his granddaughter. It was the first time either him or Joanna had seen Jessica. They saw her briefly after she was born, but they hadn't seen her since and it upset them that they had missed out on things.

"I'm sorry for how we treated you, we shouldn't have. I regret what I did and said, and I am really sorry, Addison. I want us to start afresh, build a proper relationship." Joanna smiled slightly, while Addison just looked at her.

"Okay." Addison nodded. "We'll try, but Jess comes first now, and I'm not going to do anything that's going to upset her, and I won't let you upset her." Addison looked at both her parents who both nodded and agreed. Things were getting better for everyone.


End file.
